


Maybe This One's Different

by sarCATstic1



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Asthmatic Kenma, Blow Jobs, Cancer, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Kageyama Tobio/Hinata Shouyou, Eventual Smut, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Hinata Shouyou & Kozume Kenma Friendship, Hinata is a ball of sunshine, M/M, Med-school Student Kuroo, Mentions of Cancer, POV Kozume Kenma, POV Kuroo Tetsurou, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Shower Sex, Sleepy Cuddles, Slow Burn, established bokuto/akaashi, protective kuroo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2018-09-15 21:03:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 23
Words: 62,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9257159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarCATstic1/pseuds/sarCATstic1
Summary: Kozume Kenma enjoyed his life. He had a decent apartment, a cat with quite the personality, and enough time on his hands between working and sleeping to play video games.  He didn't think he needed anything else. That is, until a tall, lanky, med school student walked through the front door of the bookstore he worked at and made him question everything he thought relationships were supposed to be. Pretty soon Kenma's life is consumed with bedhead, puns, and the increasingly concerning need to let Kuroo Tetsurou into his life. But can he let go of his past and the horrors that haunt him and give Kuroo a chance?





	1. Ugh, Mornings

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy!

     A shrill ringing was what woke Kozume Kenma at what he was sure was an ungodly hour in the morning. He rolled over and fumbled a hand around on his nightstand until he found his still ringing phone, answering with a groan without even bothering to check the caller ID. Only a small handful of people had his phone number anyway.

     "Good morning to you too, Kenma-kun," a smooth, familiar voice replied. Ah, so it was Akaashi. That could only mean one thing. "I hate to bother you so early in the morning, but Hinata-kun called and said he couldn't make his shift today. If it isn't too much trouble, could you come in?"

     Kenma sighed. As much as he enjoyed Hinata Shouyou as a friend, he had a real knack for giving Kenma a headache. "Yeah," he mumbled, scratching at his sleep-mused hair. "I'll be there in about forty-five minutes."

     He barely waited for Akaashi's murmured thanks before hanging up. He threw his phone to the bottom of his bed with a little more force than necessary but couldn't be bothered to care when he looked at the alarm clock next to his bed and saw that it read 6:23 am. The bright red numbers blared stubbornly at him, reminding him that no matter how long he stared at them they wouldn't change to a more reasonable time.

     Eventually, when he couldn't put it off any longer, Kenma rolled out of his warm and welcoming bed to touch his bare feet to the icy wooden floor of his apartment. Even though he was expecting it, he couldn't help but flinch at the cold, whimpering to himself pathetically. He pulled his comforter off with him as he exited his bed, not quite ready to abandon its warmth. If there was one thing that was constant about Kozume Kenma, it would be the fact that he hated mornings. With a burning passion. While he loved sleeping, waking up was the bane of his existence.

     As he stumbled to the bathroom, the sound of paws sprinting towards him managed to tug a small smile to his lips. An orange ball launched itself at his legs, rubbing against his chilled skin pleasantly. Frank, Kenma's cat, purred up at him as he bent to pet him, both of them relishing in the affection. The cat babbled to him in the way that only cats could as if to say, "You were asleep for _six whole hours_! Do you know how lonely I was?"

     "I know, buddy. I know. I'll give you cuddles after I get home from work, okay?" Kenma murmured, and Frank butted his hand with his head before padding off towards the kitchen. Kenma shook his head in amusement before continuing on to the bathroom. He groaned when he looked in the mirror, taking in the rat's nest he called hair. Sometimes he really wondered what he did when he slept. Especially when he woke up looking like he had been struck by lightning. With a sigh, he pulled out a brush and tried to tame the mess on his head.

     It took a few minutes, but by the time he was satisfied with his hair Kenma was more or less awake. After splashing his face with water and brushing his teeth, he rushed into his room and threw on a thick, baggy sweater and a pair of jeans. He made a pass through the kitchen to fill Frank's food bowl and give him fresh water before going to his front door to pull on a beanie, coat, and some finger-less gloves.

     He called a quick farewell to Frank over his shoulder as he left and locked his door before making his way out into the throng of people going about their daily lives. The first initial gust of cold air hit him like a slap in the face once he was free of the protection of his apartment building, and for a second an uncomfortable tight feeling in his chest took his breath away. He reached into his pocket and took out his inhaler, shaking it a bit before slipping it between his lips and breathing in as he squeezed down. After a moment or two of waiting for the medication to take effect, the feeling went away and Kenma continued forward.

     It was easy enough for Kenma, with his small build, to weave through the crowds, quickly walking the short three blocks it was to his job. Dog-Eared was a little hole-in-the-wall store that carried books of all genres and interests, cramming as many stories onto their real and improvised shelves as they could. It was a place that Kenma had quickly become comfortable in, easily able to hide himself in the nooks and crannies throughout the store as he carefully placed each book where it was meant to be.

     The little bell attached to the door of the shop chimed as he pushed inside and out of the cold, breathing in the familiar and calming scent of books through his nose. Kenma let out a happy sigh as he made his way to the backroom, already pulling off his coat and beanie. After putting his things away, he went looking for Akaashi to tell him he had arrived. That is, if the bell hadn't already notified the store's owner.

     "Akaashi?" he called as he wandered through the store, letting his fingers run across book spines as he went. A muffled reply guided him to the far corner of the store where over abundant copies of books were kept. There, standing on a step-stool and reaching out to find a nonexistent spot to shove more books, was Akaashi.

     The taller male was lean with short, dark hair that curled at the ends and dark eyes that could pierce through even the toughest facade. Akaashi's cool and level-headed personality had been what really drew Kenma to the shop in the first place when he'd been looking for a job. It was relaxing to have a boss that could handle any situation with a meaningful look and the right phrase spoken in a firm but gentle tone.

     "I think it's about time we get another set of shelves put in here," Akaashi sighed aloud, without a doubt having already noticed Kenma approach him. Kenma snorted softly.

     "Where? The only place left to put any is on the ceiling." Akaashi huffed a laugh and nodded in agreement, throwing a glance around at the positively stuffed-to-the-brim store.

     "Maybe we'll expand," he mused with a shrug, stepping down from the stool. "Thanks for coming in. I know mornings aren't your thing."

     Kenma shook his head. "Don't mention it. If you or Shouyou need me, I'm quick to answer." He glanced around the unoccupied store, clear of anybody besides Akaashi and himself, and his eyes landed on a cart full of books. "Put backs?" he asked, pointing at the aforementioned books.

     Akaashi nodded, stuffing the books he'd been trying to shelf under one arm. "I'm expecting Bokuto-san to come by sometime today, just so you know. I know he can be a bit...overwhelming." After Kenma's nod, Akaashi moved past him to head toward a door a few feet away. "I have a few things to take care of today. I'll be in my office." And with a soft smile, the dark haired man disappeared into his office.

\\\

     In all honesty, Kenma knew he was lucky to not only have a job, but a job that he  _liked._ He liked the quiet that echoed throughout the store, only broken by the sound of turning pages or books being pulled from shelves and put back again. It was soothing. Almost like a lullaby of the softest kind.

     It also kept his brain busy, kept his mind from wandering too far into places he'd rather forget. Red dot goes in row 10; blue dot goes in row 4. Alphabetical order by name of author, not title. Series need to be placed in the correct order. It was all a process that Kenma had become so familiar with he could do it with his eyes closed.

     After he finished with one cart, there was another waiting for him at the front of the store. Probably put there by Akaashi. The man was almost as quiet on his feet as Kenma himself. He set to work immediately, helping a customer or two when they asked him a question.

     It had been quiet in the store for nearly half an hour, and Kenma was almost finished with the put backs. He was just placing one of the last five he had left on a display table when the door burst open with a gust of wintry wind.

     "Hey, hey hey!" Kenma nearly shrieked at the loud outburst, dropping the books in his arms and knocking the display table over in his shock. His breath rushed out of him so quickly that his head spun, and he swiftly pulled out his inhaler, sending a sharp glare in the direction the offending noise had come from as he waited for the medication to work its magic.

     "Ah, sorry, Kenma! I didn't see you there. I thought it was only Akaashi here today, since Itty-bitty called in sick." Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi's boyfriend, stood proudly in the front of the store, not looking the least bit sorry for scaring at least 10 years off Kenma's life.

     Kenma was about to snap something back at the energetic man, but he was cut off. "Bokuto-san, how many times do I have to ask you to please keep your voice down in here?" Akaashi appeared from the back of the store, bending down to help Kenma pick up the books he'd had spilled in his fright.

     A bright smile lit up Bokuto's face in way that even Kenma thought was endearing. "At least one more time, 'kaashi," he beamed, scooping the darker haired man up in his arms. Kenma sighed and finished cleaning up his mess as Bokuto spun them around.

     "Hey!" Bokuto exclaimed as he set Akaashi back on his feet, eyes shining with enthusiasm. "I have an awesome story to tell you about what happened today on my way here!" Kenma turned quickly and started to go anywhere besides where he was currently, ready to escape from the flood of words that was sure to come out of Bokuto's mouth. Only to be stopped by Akaashi's voice.

     "Ah, wait, Kenma-kun. Bokuto-san had something he wanted to tell me about a customer, and since I won't be here tomorrow I thought you should hear it too."

     Kenma hung his head but stopped and turned back to face the couple, waiting for the attack on his senses that was sure to come. Bokuto's face lit up again, this time in recollection.

     "Oh! That's right. Thanks for reminding me, Akaashi!" Bokuto pecked Akaashi on the cheek before continuing. "An old college friend of mine is moving here for school, and he's looking for some textbooks. I told him to come check here!"

     Kenma nodded. "Alright, what does he look like?"

     Bokuto shook his head and laughed, "Nu-uh! That's a surprise."

     Kenma frowned and closed his eyes tightly for a moment, trying to reign in his annoyance. "Then how am I supposed to know who he is?" he ground out after a minute. Bokuto smirked in reply, his eyes glinting mischievously.

     "Oh, trust me," he hummed lowly, "you'll know him when you see him."


	2. Bokuto's Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma hadn't known what to expect, but it certainly wasn't that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading and commenting on the last chapter! I practically squealed when I saw that I had things in my inbox. I'll do my best to not disappoint!

    Kenma barely slept at all that night. Too worried about meeting Bokuto's friend. He didn't do well with new people. He'd had a hard enough time with Shouyou and Akaashi when he'd first moved to the area. Bokuto was still a work in progress.

     "I should just treat him like I would any other customer, right?" he asked, looking away from his handheld to where Frank was curled into his side. The ginger cat blinked up at him from his spot on the bed and flicked an ear as if to say, "You're over thinking this."

     "I know, I know," Kenma murmured as he turned his attention back to his game, restarting the level because he'd died. "But it would probably be a good opportunity to make a new friend. You and I both know I could use one of those."

     Kenma turned off his handheld and dropped it in his lap when he died again, his attention elsewhere anyway. "I don't know, Frank," he sighed, dropping a hand to pet the cat clumsily. A purr rumbled against his palm, and Kenma closed his eyes, letting the sound soothe his fraying nerves as he drifted off to sleep.

\\\

     Kenma came close to throwing his alarm clock out his bedroom window when it woke him up with its shrieking at 5 am, but he refrained himself. It wasn't the device's fault he had to wake up at the ass crack of dawn to open Dog-Eared because Akaashi was gone that day. If anything, he should throw Akaashi out his bedroom window. But he liked Akaashi, and lifting the taller male would take effort, so Kenma supposed he could be forgiven.

     Frank meowed at him when he forced himself out of bed, probably shocked at seeing him awake this early. Kenma grumbled to him on his way to the bathroom, wanting none of the ginger cat's sass this early in the morning.

     After a longer-than-necessary shower (because the hot water nearly put him to sleep again) Kenma blow dried his hair and brushed his teeth, awake enough now to know that he needed to hurry. He threw a cardigan over a long-sleeved shirt and pulled on some jeans before padding to the kitchen to take care of Frank's needs and fix himself a bagel.

     Once he could close his eyes without wanting to keep them closed, he threw on his coat, beanie, and gloves and was out the door, pausing only to grab a scarf at the last second. When he left the apartment building he was glad he had. By wrapping the scarf around his mouth, he kept warm air in his lungs which fought off another attack.

     Kenma walked to work with ease, most sensible people still asleep at this hour and not clogging up the sidewalk. He huffed at the thought as he pulled out the keys to open the store, still bitter about having to wake up so early. He kept the closed sign up as he went to the back room to put his things away, deciding that a customer could wait 15 more minutes to get a book.

     Once it was time, Kenma took the sign down and officially opened the store, flicking on the little light that declared as much to anyone who passed the store front. Then he set about his daily tasks, marking the new books they had received the day before, taking care of the put backs, and anything else he could think of to keep his mind preoccupied.

     Idle thoughts were not something Kenma was very fond of. His mind liked to dig up long buried memories that he'd rather keep silent. So when everything was taken care of, he plopped himself down at the front desk and pulled out his phone. He played around on it for a while, switching between games when he got tired of one.

     Kenma barely looked up when the first customer arrived at 8-ish, glancing in their direction before going back to his game when they ignored him and went to browse. A few more showed up a little later, and Kenma was content to play on his phone as he listened to the customers shuffle around through the store.

     After dying for the fourth time to a particularly hard boss, Kenma huffed and set his phone down on the desk, frowning down at the little gadget as if it was causing him grief on purpose. A soft cough directly in front of him made him jump with a yelp and look up, his heart racing in his chest.

     The stranger jumped too, surprised by Kenma's reaction, and threw his hands out in front of him to show he meant no harm. "Sorry, sorry," a deep voice chuckled. "I didn't mean to scare you."

     Kenma shook his head as his heart rate slowed down. "No, no. You're fine. I shouldn't have been so wrapped up in my game at work anyway." He quickly locked his phone and slid it into his pocket. "How can I help you?" he asked, his eyes focusing on the customer's face. The first thing he noticed about the man was his sleep-mused hair. It was obvious that he'd woken up with it that way and decided to leave it be. On anybody else it might have looked silly, but he pulled it off nicely.

     "Oh! Uh, I'm looking for some cheap textbooks, and my friend told me I should check here. Said that you guys were really helpful." Then man scratched at the back of his head as he smiled down at Kenma.

     "Ah, you must be Bokuto's friend," he concluded, sliding off the stool he'd been sitting on to walk around the desk. "He said you'd stop by today. Though he didn't bother telling me what you looked like so I would know who you were." He gestured for Bokuto's friend to follow him as the lead the way to the area of the store where they kept the textbooks they could get their hands on, both new and used.

     The man chuckled again as he followed Kenma, keeping a comfortable distance between the two of them as they walked side-by-side. "Yeah, that sounds like something Bo would do," he commented, looking around as they passed shelf after shelf full of books. "My name's Kuroo, by the way. Kuroo Tetsurou."

     "Kozume Kenma," Kenma replied, checking the label on a shelf as they passed by to make sure they were on the right path.

     "It's nice to meet you, Kozume," Kuroo said with a smile, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

     "Oh, you can just call me Kenma. Everyone else does," he said with a one shoulder shrug, stopping in front of a large archway with a sign over it that read 'Textbooks'. "What are you looking for?"

     Kuroo dug around in his pocket and pulled out a slip of paper. "Uh...Emergency Medical Procedures and Concepts. My professor said it doesn't have to be the newest copy, a few years old would be fine." Kenma nodded and led them down the section marked 'Medical'. 

     "Alright. I don't stock the textbooks, so I don't really know where it would be. If you want I can call another employee and see if they know." While Kenma was almost certain that Shouyou had no idea where to even begin looking for the desired book, he figured it was at least polite for him to offer.

     Kuroo shook his head. "No, no. That's okay. I don't mind looking for it myself. I don't really have anything else to do today anyway." And with that, he started to brush his fingers over the shelves as he searched.

     Kenma took his moment of distraction as a chance to give the dark haired man a once over. He was tall, much taller than Kenma, and had long, lanky arms that moved gracefully despite their size. His legs, too, seemed to go on for miles. Kenma took a second to admire the way Kuroo's jacket settled over his broad shoulders, emphasizing the muscle there.

     It wasn't until his eyes had skimmed up to take in a sharp edge of tanned jaw that Kenma noticed a smirk pulling at the corner of Kuroo's lips. Kenma's eye flicked up to Kuroo's, a flush rushing to his cheeks when their gazes met. He quickly looked away, practically launching himself at the shelf to help look for the book.

     The quiet around them echoed painfully in Kenma's ears, reminding him of just how awkward he had made the whole situation. Caught staring, of all things! Maybe if he wished it to happen really, really hard, he'd turn invisible. And if that didn't work, he was doing a commendable job hiding behind his hair.

     Next to him, Kuroo cleared his throat and chuckled, "Hey," Kenma winced and waited for the 'you seem like a nice guy, but...' speech, only to be surprised when the taller man asked, "You wanna hear a joke?"

     Kenma blinked up at him, hesitating for a second before mumbling a soft, "Sure."

     "Why was the broom late to work?"

     "Why?"

     Kuroo ducked his head and snickered for a moment before turning to Kenma with a smile. "Because he overswept."

     Kenma groaned at the pun, shaking his head as he continued searching. "That was awful," he whined, chuckling despite himself. Kuroo laughed and nodded, turning to check the shelf behind them.

     "I know, I know. I just can't help myself." He glanced over his shoulder at Kenma with a small, genuine smile. " But it made you laugh, so it can't have been that bad." Kenma didn't know what to say to that, so he was grateful when the bell at the front desk dinged, meaning a customer needed help.

     "I have to go. Let me know if you need anything," he told Kuroo as he hurried off, not missing the way Kuroo's shirt rode up when he reached up to search the books on the top shelf.

     His cheeks still felt hot when he reached the front desk, helping a customer who was ready to check out. While he wanted to help Kuroo, Kenma was glad to have a break from the bedroom-eyed man. It had been a very long time since anyone had shown any interest in him, at least any that was welcomed. He didn't really know how to deal with it.

     He noticed a cart full of books to his left and huffed, deciding to get to work. Put backs were good for his thought process anyway. It was a chance for him to clear his mind and really narrow his field of focus. 

     Kenma was just finishing when a soft knock to his right caught his attention. When he looked up, Kuroo was standing at the end of the shelf, hands shoved in his pockets again.

     "Did you find it?" Kenma asked, holding the book he was about to put up to his chest. When Kuroo shook his head, Kenma frowned. "I'm sorry. We don't get a whole lot of textbooks here. Let me know if I can help you find anything else."

     "Um, actually there's another store I heard about that's supposed to carry a wider selection. I was wondering if, maybe, you'd like to come with me? Maybe get some coffee, too?" Kuroo glanced up at him hopefully, and Kenma stared at him with wide eyes.

     "I don't like coffee," he said in a soft voice, clutching the book in his hands closers to his chest.

     Kuroo's shoulders slumped a bit. "Oh," he nodded and lifted a hand to rub at the back of his neck. "Okay. That's fine. I'll just, uh, I'll head out then."

     He turned to leave, but before he could take a step, Kenma blurted out, "Chai tea!"

     Kuroo turned back. "Hmm?"

     Kenma ducked is head, feeling his face heat up as he glanced up at Kuroo again through his hair. "I like Chai tea."

     Kuroo smiled brightly and nodded. "Chai tea it is then." He dug his phone out and handed it to Kenma, and with only slightly shaking fingers, Kenma typed in his phone number and saved it. "I'll text you so we can figure a plan out." Kuroo's smile seemed to widen even more, if that was possible, as he turned to leave. "I'll see you soon," he called over his shoulder with a wave.

     Kenma fumbled with his jacket pocket once the front door closed, pulling out his inhaler, pushing it into his mouth, and squeezing as he breathed in. Ohgodohgodohgodohgod-

     "I have a date," he breathed to no one. Kozume Kenma had a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, please let me know what you thought of it. All of your comments and kudos make me all warm and fuzzy inside!


	3. Here Goes Nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma struggles with the idea of going on a date with Kuroo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Kenma. Someone please save this stressed out baby.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy! Thanks for reading!

     "You have a  _date_?" Kenma sighed at Shouyou's tone and rolled his eyes

     "It does happen, you know," Kenma muttered, throwing the ginger a dirty look. He'd closed Dog-Eared early, sure that Akaashi wouldn't mind, and called Shouyou as soon as he could. Something about the human ball of energy calmed and amused him. He was also one of the only friends Kenma had.

     "Well, yeah. I know that, but you've haven't agreed to one in a long time. This is a big deal! Like,  _uwaaa_ , it's exciting!" After his outburst, Shouyou abruptly fell into a coughing fit, leaning back into the pillows set behind him.

     The sound of footsteps reached Kenma's ears, and a few seconds later Shouyou's bedroom door opened. "Dumbass! Stop shouting. You're going to hurt your throat," a tall, scowling man growled, balancing a bowl of soup and a drink on the tray he was holding as he came in. "And you," he said, turning to Kenma, "stop exciting him."

     "But Kageyama," Shouyou whined, pouting up at his boyfriend, "this is really important! Kenma hasn't had a date in ages." Kageyama rolled his eyes and plopped down on the bed beside the ginger, gently placing the tray in his lap.

     Kenma sighed and played with a thread at the bottom of his cardigan. He hadn't meant to come and make Shouyou worse, that was the furthest thing from what he wanted, but with Akaashi busy for the rest of the day, Shouyou was the only one he had left. Granted, while Frank was a great listener, the cat wasn't much of a conversationalist. And Kenma needed someone to tell him that he wasn't crazy for agreeing to a date with Kuroo.

     "I'm so happy for you, Kenma," Shouyou beamed down at him. "I know you're probably really nervous, but that's okay. I'm sure everything will be great!" Kenma wanted to ask his friend how he was so sure. He didn't even know what had compelled him to agree to a date with Kuroo. Sure, the man had seemed kind, but as Kenma had learned the hard way, everyone lies about something.

     Kenma watched as Kageyama brushed some hair away from Shouyou's face while the sick man ate, a tender look on the usually scowling man's face. He quickly looked away, feeling like he was intruding on an intimate moment, and pretended that the carpet was the most interesting thing he'd seen all day.

     Despite the fact that Kenma went on a date about as often as someone willingly had a root canal, he really did want a relationship. It was just hard for him to trust someone that much after what had happened with-

     Kenma shook his head before he could follow that path too far. That was not something he wanted to think about right now. "Hey, I'm gonna head home. Get out of your hair," he mumbled as he stood, pulling on his beanie and gloves.

     "Aw, you're gonna leave me all alone with  _this_?" Shouyou snickered when Kageyama threw him a dirty look. He stopped Kenma before he could leave the bedroom, giving him a serious look. "You know you can talk to me whenever you need to, right? About anything."

     Kenma nodded, looking anywhere but at Shouyou. He hated making his friends worry about him, but it seemed to be a common occurrence. Kageyama followed him to their front door, helping him into his coat.

     "Hey," Kageyama started before Kenma was through the door, "I know we don't talk much, but you're Hinata's friend. So, if you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask, yeah?" Kenma stared up at him, speechless to say the least. That was probably the most he'd ever heard Kageyama say, other than when he was shouting at Shouyou.

     Kenma mumbled a soft thanks and left the couple to their night in, wrapping his scarf around his neck securely before stepping out into the cold. It wasn't a long walk from Shouyou's apartment to Kenma's own, thankfully, so he hurried his way through the crowds of people rushing home. As he walked, he kept his eyes glued to his phone, having perfected the art of game playing and walking without bumping into anything a long time ago.

     Once he was safely inside his apartment, he threw himself on his bed, coat and all. Soon after, Kenma felt the bed shift as Frank, too, jumped onto the bed, rubbing his face into the back of Kenma's head since his own face was currently buried in his matress. He groaned before turning over and pulling the ginger cat into his chest, letting the gentle purrs coming from the cat comfort him.

     "What am I going to do, Frank? You know how I am around new people. I'll look like an idiot," he grumbled into Frank's fur, curling up. "Maybe," Kenma abruptly sat up, "maybe I should just cancel. He'll text me, and I can say that I thought about it and decided I'm just not ready." After a moment of silence, he hung his head. "But he seems nice, and I really don't want to upset him," he whined, covering his face with his hands as he thought about the look on Kuroo's face when he'd almost rejected him.

     Finally, after a good ten minutes of waffling, Kenma looked up, seeing Frank watching him with calculating eyes. He straightened with a huff and held out both hands. "Okay, Frank. Left hand, I suck it up and go on the date; right hand, I tell Kuroo I'm just not ready." Frank blinked up at him slowly, not breaking eye contact until, without hesitation, he plopped his head down in Kenma's left hand, sealing the blonde's fate with a soft purr.

     Kenma let out a shaky breath and nodded.  _Okay_ , he thought to himself,  _I can do this._

\\\

     Kenma woke up much earlier than he would have liked to on his day off, but his nerves wouldn't let him sleep any later than 7 am. Kuroo had texted him the night before and asked if it was okay to get together the next day. Kenma had said that was alright, not backing out of the deal he'd made with Frank, and they'd both agreed to meet at Dog-Eared around 10:30 in the morning. Kuroo had an early class, so it was no problem for him to be up that early. Kenma, on the other hand, was fighting with his sheets and blankets to release him from their warm grip.

     Despite the fact that he'd been awake for at least 2 hours, Kenma was still having trouble getting out of bed. It was partly because of the warm covers and partly because of the fact that whenever he thought about meeting up with Kuroo it felt like there were wasps in his stomach. Okay, it was mostly the wasps thing. But he couldn't help it. It had been nearly a year and a half since he'd last gone out on anything that resembled a date. He was more than a little rusty.

     Regardless of that fact, if he didn't get up soon and get ready he would be late, and that would definitely not be good. So, despite the wasps buzzing in his stomach, Kenma forced himself out of bed and into the shower. Frank joined him in the bathroom, singing the song of his people while Kenma brushed his teeth. After a blast from the hairdryer, though, the cat bolted out of the room, probably to go wait by his food dish.

     Once Kenma was happy with what he saw in the mirror, he threw on what he believed to be his most-date-worthy outfit. It consisted on a not-as-worn sweater and some newer jeans that didn't have holes in them. He padded to the kitchen where Frank was waiting for him, eyes glued to his food dish.

     "Alright, Frank," Kenma sighed as he filled the dish, "wish me luck." And with that, he slid on his coat, gloves, and scarf, foregoing the beanie, and was out the door. He made sure to breathe through his scarf as he walked, keeping warm air in his lungs to avoid an attack. It wouldn't be a fun start to the date if he had to cancel because he couldn't breathe.

     The streets and sidewalks weren't very busy, so Kenma had an easy time walking to Dog-Eared. A glance at his phone told him that he would actually be a little early to their designated meeting place. He wasn't sure if he was happy about that or not. He could always go inside and talk to Akaashi, that way he wouldn't be standing out in the open. Of course, then Kuroo could come by and think he'd ditched him since he wasn't waiting outside-

     The thought cut off in his mind when he rounded the corner and saw Kuroo standing in front of the shop, two to-go cups in his hands. Kenma was about to get his attention when the sound of an engine revving cut through the air. Kuroo visibly jumped at the noise, eyes wide and scared for a brief moment, and Kenma was shocked at just how vulnerable he looked.

     Seconds later, a motorcycle pulled into one of the parking spacing in front of Dog-Eared, the rider hopping off and pulling their helmet from their head. It was Bokuto, of course. His grey and black hair unmistakable. The boisterous man wooped and pulled Kuroo into a bear hug, and Kenma noticed Kuroo eye the motorcycle nervously as he walked up to the two.

     The look disappeared immediately when Kuroo caught a glimpse of him, a bright smile tugging at his lips. "Kenma!" he called cheerfully, moving to meet him. "How are you today?"

     Kenma shrugged, glancing at the backpack Kuroo was wearing. "How was class?" A flush rose to Kuroo's cheeks as he scratched at his nose with a thumb, an impressive task to do while holding a cup of something steaming.

     "Actually, class was canceled today. I didn't find out until I showed up," he chuckled, holding out a cup to Kenma. "One Chai tea, as promised." The tall man grinned as Kenma accepted the drink with a murmured thanks, glad to have the warmth in his hands.

     "How long have you been out here, then?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. The tea was still hot, so it couldn't have been too long.

     "Not very long," Kuroo said as he scratched at the back of his head with his now free hand.

     "He's been out here at least an hour," a soft voice said from Dog-Eared's doorway.

     "Akaashi!" Bokuto cried, throwing himself at the quiet man, immediately falling into a narrative of how his morning had been so far. Kuroo's flush darkened as he threw a betrayed look at Akaashi, shoving his hand in his pocket.

     "Okay, so maybe I needed some time to prepare," he mumbled, taking a drink from his cup. "Besides, it let me get our drinks so we wouldn't have to wait in line."

     Kenma hummed in appreciation as he took another sip of his team. "It's very good." He looked up to see Kuroo smiling down at him, pleased. Kenma ducked his head, suddenly finding the crack in the sidewalk by his feet very interesting, which earned him a chuckle.

     "Alright, well, you ready to go?" Kuroo asked, voice laced with amusement.

     Kenma sighed and nodded, taking a swing of his tea as they started walking. "As I'll ever be." They waved goodbye to Akaashi and the still blabbering Bokuto and headed out, starting the first date Kenma had had in almost two years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please tell me what you thought. All comments are very much appreciated. At this point, they're what keep me alive. Stay tuned for more!


	4. An Interruption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma and Kuroo's date goes well, until something unexpected pops up and cuts things short.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Please enjoy smooth and gentlemanly Kuroo!

     Kuroo chattered away as they walked to the bookstore, seeming to not mind one bit when Kenma only responded with nods or soft noises. It wasn't until he started to talk about his classes that Kenma actually spoke up.

     "What made you want to go into medicine?" Kenma asked, curiosity getting the better of him. The minute the question left his mouth, he regretted it. "I'm sorry. You probably get asked that all the time," he floundered, taking a drink of his tea to occupy his mouth.

     "No, no. It's fine," Kuroo chuckled, glancing at Kenma from the corner of his eye with a smile. "I like talking about it, because it's a big part of my life." The tall man swirled a finger over the lid of his cup, his eyes distant for a moment. "My grandfather was sick when I was a kid. A lot. So he stayed with my parents and me, that way someone could take care of him. We didn't want to put him in a home when we had plenty of space at our house." Kenma nodded along, watching Kuroo's expression carefully.

     "Well, more often than not, I was the one there to help him. My parents worked a lot, so I would take care of him in the ways that I could. I got his medicine, fed him, and sometimes I just sat and talked to him." Kuroo frowned down at his cup and took a drink. "They don't mention that in Med School. That you have to be more than just a doctor." Kenma furrowed his brow in concern but didn't push the subject, not wanting to upset the dark haired man.

     "Your parents must be very proud," he commented, and Kuroo was quiet for a while, staring down at his feet.

     "Yeah," he agreed, turning to smile at Kenma brightly. "So, what about you? Going to school anywhere?"

     Kenma shook his head. "No, I'm just working for Akaashi right now. I wanted to be a game designer, but it didn't work out." He shrugged, watching a couple hold hands ahead of them. He expected Kuroo to give him the speech that everyone, even Akaashi, had given him. 'You're so smart, all you're doing is wasting your potential. Go back to school, blah, blah, blah.' Instead, Kuroo simply shrugged.

     "I'm sure everything will work itself out. You seem like a pretty resourceful person." They walked along in silence for a while, Kenma trying to fight off the cold with his dwindling cup of warm Chai tea. It wasn't until Kuroo held out a hand that Kenma noticed his own fingernails were turning an odd color, having taken off his gloves to hold his drink better. He looked up at the taller man, raising an eyebrow in question.

     "Your hand looks cold," he said by way of explanation, and Kenma abruptly flushed when he realized what Kuroo meant. Of course he'd noticed Kenma looking at the couples passing them, staring at their joined hands. More than a little hesitantly, he let go of his cup with one hand and slipped his freezing fingers into Kuroo's waiting hand, immediately surprised by how warm it was. Kuroo jumped at the touch and started down at Kenma, horrified. "Jesus! Why didn't you say something? Your hands are like ice."

     Kenma stared, wide eyed and red faced, as Kuroo raised the hand he was holding to his mouth and huffed hot air against it, muttering something about poor circulation. Kuroo tugged Kenma along, still keeping a tight hold of his hand. "Come on. The store's not too far. We need to get you warmed up," he said, still keeping his stride short enough that Kenma could easily keep up. Kenma was thankful for the cold wind nipping at his cheeks and nose, sure that it would hide his flaming face.

     He was surprised again when Kuroo held the door open for him, ushering him in out of the cold. The tall man rushed in behind him with a relieved sigh, glancing around the room. "Should we ask for help, or do you think we can find it by ourselves?"

     Kenma glanced over at the front desk, watching the girl there with a frown as she eyed Kuroo. "I think we can manage," he muttered, already searching out the textbook section. Kuroo chuckled behind him and followed him when he headed off in a direction.

     Once they reached the textbooks, Kuroo tugged on the back of Kenma's coat, snickering behind his hand when Kenma turned around. He pulled out a book, a thesaurus Kenma noted, and asked, "Hey, Kenma, what does a thesaurus have for breakfast?"

     Kenma sighed but couldn't stop his lips from twitching into a little grin. "What?"

     "A synonym roll," the dark haired man managed to get out through his laughing. Kenma shook his head and covered his mouth with a hand, hiding his smile.

     "Is this what I get to look forward to for the rest of our date?" he chuckled, raising an eyebrow at Kuroo when he smiled at Kenma fondly.

     "As long as you keep calling it a date," he replied, slipping the thesaurus back in its place. Kenma's previous flush rushed back at the comment, and he quickly looked away, suddenly finding his hands oddly fascinating. Kuroo hummed at him, amused, and Kenma quickly moved them on to the medical section.

     "So, do you have any roommates?" Kuroo asked, browsing the shelf in front of him.

     Kenma shrugged. "Well, sort of. I have a cat." A sharp intake of breath caught his attention, and he turned to see Kuroo staring at him in awe.

     "You have a cat?" the dark haired man breathed, stars in his eyes. Kenma nodded, smiling a little at Kuroo's reaction.

     "His name is Frank." Kuroo's smile widened, if that was possible, and Kenma couldn't help but find it adorable.

     "I must meet this Frank. He'll love me."

     Kenma raised an eyebrow at him. "What makes you say that?"

     Kuroo shrugged and placed a finger to his chin thoughtfully. "Bo says it's because I'm a cat in a human's body. I think we just get along easily." Kenma nodded, truly curious about how an interaction between Frank and Kuroo would turn out now.

     "What was the book you were looking for again?" he asked, running a finger along the books in front of him. None of the titles made sense to him, and he couldn't even pronounce half of them. How Kuroo could understand anything in them, Kenma had no idea.

     "Emergency Medical Procedures and Concepts," Kuroo replied, crouching down to check the bottom shelf. Kenma made a noise of agreement and moved to the bookcase behind them. He couldn't help but criticize how unorganized the books in this store were. There was no rhyme or reason here.

     "Ah," he murmured, spotting the title at the top shelf. He pushed himself to his toes and stretched out an arm, reaching as high as he could and cursing his short stature when his fingers just brushed the book's spine.

     After struggling for a minute longer, he managed to get a hold of it, pulling it down with a triumphant noise. "Hey, Kuroo, is this it?" He turned to show the book in his hands, searching the cover curiously. It was light by textbook standards, something that surprised Kenma. Even if he had only gone to college for a year he knew that the textbooks were so heavy that they could be used as weapons.

     Kuroo cheered when he saw the book in Kenma's hands. "Yes! I knew it was a good idea to ask you to come. Thank you," he beamed down at the shorter man, "I've been looking for this for almost two weeks."

     Kenma nodded and fidgeted with the bottom of his cardigan, wondering what they were going to do now. Kuroo wouldn't end the date now, would he? They'd barely spent a little over an hour together. While Kenma was more than just a little antisocial, he enjoyed spending time with Kuroo, and the thought of having to say goodbye to the pun loving man made him a little disappointed.

     As if he read Kenma's mind, Kuroo hugged the book to his chest and said, "Okay, let me go pay for this, and we'll find something else for us to do." Kenma nodded and followed closely behind the taller man, absolutely sure that his face would be burned with all of the blushing he was doing today.

\\\

     After Kuroo paid, they left the store. Once again, Kuroo offered a hand to Kenma, a gentle smile on his lips that made it impossible for Kenma to refuse. It had warmed up a bit outside while they were in the store, making it a much more pleasant walk back towards Dog-Eared. Kenma had mentioned a small restaurant close to the store that made amazing cherry turnovers. And Kuroo had been all too eager to go.

     Kenma couldn't help but notice just how much bigger Kuroo's hands were than his own as they walked. Kuroo's hand dwarfed Kenma's, almost completely wrapping it in a comforting warmth that made Kenma's stomach flip. It was a nice contrast to his usually freezing hands.

     Kenma let out a long breath into his scarf, mind whirring at a hundred miles an hour. While he liked Kuroo, he needed to keep his guard up. There was no telling if, or when, the taller man could snap and do a total 180. It had happened to Kenma before.

     A shrill ringing suddenly cut off Kenma's thoughts, and Kuroo dug around in his pocket until he pulled out his phone. "Ah, sorry. I have to take this. It's my mom." Kenma nodded and let go of Kuroo's hand, studying the soft and happy smile that pulled at Kuroo's lips as he walked a few feet away to answer. The conversation must have taken a turn, because Kuroo suddenly frowned, concern making him look almost ten years older.

     He glanced over at Kenma, clearly struggling with something, before murmuring something over the phone and hanging up. He approached Kenma with a regretful look on his face, shoulders slumped slightly.

     "I'm so sorry, Kenma. Something came up and my mom needs my help. Is there any way we could reschedule the cherry turnovers?" Kuroo asked, his features still aged with concern.

     Kenma nodded quickly, giving a small smile despite the sinking in his stomach. "Yeah, sure. I understand. Go help your mom," he replied, pulling on his gloves now that he wouldn't have Kuroo's hands to warm his own.

     "Okay, well, let me at least walk you to your apartment, " Kuroo offered, but Kenma didn't fail to notice him glance down at his phone, worry written all over his face.

     He shook his head. "No, that's okay. It's still almost four blocks from here. Go help your mom, and we'll get together for turnovers later," he insisted, waving Kuroo on.

     Kuroo gave him a smile overflowing with gratitude and nodded. "Okay. I promise, next time I won't cut our date short." He crossed a finger over his heart as he backed away, headed for the train station. Kenma flushed at the mention of the word 'date' again and nodded, waving goodbye as he watched Kuroo's broad shoulders disappear in the crowd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, poor Kenma. But, yay, some background info on Kuroo! There's definitely more to come, too.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, your comments and kudos mean the world to me. Let me know what you thought/think!


	5. Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma has a rough day, and his and Kuroo's relationship grows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There is some mention of past sexual abuse towards the end of this chapter. It's very brief and not very explicit, but I thought I should let everyone know just in case.
> 
> That being said, here's some progress in Kenma's background. At least a little bit. There will be more in the next chapter.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Please enjoy!

     "Come on, Kuroo! One more," Bokuto pleaded as he leaned forward, practically draping himself over the dark haired man's chest.

     "Yeah, Kuroo! One more," Shouyou chirped behind him, bouncing on the balls of his feet in excitement.

     Kuroo chuckled and patted the man-child leaning against him on the back. "Alright, fine. One more." He cleared his throat. "What do you call a pile of cats?" Bokuto and Shouyou stared at him, eager for the answer. "A meowtain."

     Kenma groaned from where he was standing, dusting the top of the bookcases. Bokuto and Shouyou's laughter echoed in the empty store, as it had for the past forty-five minutes. Kuroo grinned up at him, no remorse at all for the horrible puns he'd been making. Akaashi shook his head beside Bokuto, a small smile gracing his features, and sighed.

     "Come on, Bokuto-san. I need to go get these orders in before they close." Bokuto's head snapped up at Akaashi's words, his bright smile never wavering as he wrapped an arm around his boyfriend's waist.

     "Okay, Akaashi!" He turned to the others in the store, waving over exaggeratedly. "Bye guys! We'll be back when we're back!" Akaashi also murmured a farewell as they exited the store, making sure to close the front door gently.

     Kenma sighed went back to his dusting once they were gone, covering his mouth with a hand as he did so. This was his least favorite chore because of his asthma. Thankfully they only dusted the bookcases once a month, so he could manage. He glanced at Kuroo out of the corner of his eye, smiling when he saw the tall man and Shouyou conversing excitedly. The two had hit it off when they first met, not that Kenma had thought anything else would've happened.

     Kenma and Kuroo had had quite a few dates since their first one, ranging all over from coffee shops to a walk in the park where Kuroo had nearly fallen in an almost frozen pond. And despite the many, many puns Kuroo had made throughout all of their dates, he'd enjoyed himself. In fact, spending time with Kuroo had become the highlight of his day.

     Kenma coughed as he fanned the air in front of him, glaring at the dusty shelf. "Kenma, be careful," Kuroo called from where he was talking to Shouyou. Kenma rolled his eyes and muttered a response that was more sass than anything else. Ever since Kuroo had found out that Kenma had asthma he'd done just about everything he could to make sure he didn't have an attack. It would have been annoying if it wasn't so endearing.

     Shouyou rushed over and puttered around the step-stool Kenma was using. "Kenma, let me help!" He pulled another stool over and started vigorously dusting.

     Kenma frantically waved his hands, trying to get his energetic friend to stop. "No, Shouyou, wait!" But it was too late. A cloud of dust hit him in the face and his lungs immediately decided to try and do their best impression of a rustling plastic bag, stuttering in his chest as he coughed. He frantically searched his person, patting his pockets for his inhaler as his throat started closing and coming up empty handed. It was then that he remembered he'd put it in his coat pocket this morning, rather than his cardigan or pants.

     "Kenma," Kuroo's urgent voice came from behind him, and he glanced back at the wide eyed man as he wheezed and gasped, trying to suck air into his lungs as they refused to work. There were hands at his waist right before he stumbled, carefully pulling him from the stool. "Where's your inhaler?"

     Kenma struggled to find enough air to strangle out a soft, "Coat," as he grabbed at his chest. Shouyou was letting out panicked sounds to his right, pacing back and forth.

     "Hinata, go get Kenma's inhaler from his coat," Kuroo ordered in what sounded like a purposefully calm tone as he gently lowered the two of them to the ground so that they were sitting, settling Kenma against his chest. "Kenma, take deep breaths. In and out."

     Kenma wanted to snap at him that he couldn't, that was the whole point of an asthma attack, but he didn't have enough air. It was getting harder to breathe, which in turn made him panic, which then made it even  _harder_ to breathe. Pain flared in his chest as he struggled, hands clenching into tight fists in Kuroo's pants.

     Kuroo put a hand over his chest, just barely touching him so that he didn't put any added pressure. "Breathe with me." He took an exaggeratedly slow breath, and Kenma tried his best to copy him, breathing in as deep as he could before breathing out with him. They repeated those steps over and over, Kenma whimpering pathetically when his chest ached. Kuroo let him lean against his body, keeping him upright while he murmured calming words in his ear softly.

     After what felt like an eternity (even though Kenma knew it had only been five minutes at most), Shouyou came sprinting up to them. "I found it," he shouted, and Kenma nearly sobbed in relief when the familiar plastic touched his lips. His hands scrambled to grasp the inhaler, closing around the warm fingers already holding it, and squeezed down as he breathed in. He took another hit of the medication, just in case, and tried to wait patiently until it started working.

     Once he could actually breathe again, Kenma cleared his throat and rasped, "Thank you," closing his eyes against the pain of his still-throbbing head. He didn't have enough energy to flinch when he felt a thumb brush over first his left, then his right cheek, rubbing at a wetness that was on his skin.

     He blinked his eyes open to see Kuroo staring down at him, eyes full of concern. He didn't even know he'd been crying until Kuroo had wiped his tears away. "You okay, now?" Kuroo murmured to him, his voice low and shaky. Kenma nodded weakly and looked over at Shouyou, who was crying and shaking like a leaf.

     "No more dusting today," he wheezed, and Shouyou sniffled, nodding fractically.

\\\

     That's how Akaashi and Bokuto had found them when they came back a few minutes later, Kenma leaning against Kuroo's chest relishing in the feeling of air in his lungs and Shouyou sniffling a few feet away from them. Amazingly, Akaashi was able to piece together what exactly had happened without any sort of explanation, and he quickly filled Bokuto in before he could start shouting questions at them.

     "I'm so sorry, Kenma. I wasn't thinking," Shouyou whimpered for what had to be the hundredth time. Kenma shook his head again, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.

     "It's alright, Shouyou. I'm okay, just tired," he sighed, leaning his head back against Kuroo's shoulder and closing his eyes. A hand brushed some hair way from his face, and he could only assume that it was Kuroo. The dark haired man had been uncharacteristically quiet ever since Kenma's asthma had calmed down, softly touching his face or hands every once in a while, as if to assure himself that Kenma was alright.

     "Listen," Akaashi started, his voice soft and calm as usual, "let's all go home. I'll close the store early. There's supposed to be a storm coming through here anyway. Get home, and stay safe. I'll let you know about coming in tomorrow or not." Kenma wanted to sob in relief at Akaashi's words, eager to curl up in his bed with Frank and sleep.

     Kuroo helped him to his feet, hands resting on his waist for a bit to make sure he didn't stumble "I'll go get your coat," he told him, squeezing his hand gently before leaving.

     Shouyou was at his side in an instant, wrapping his arms around Kenma. "I'm sorry!  _Gah,_ that was so scary!" Kenma sighed and nodded as his friend hugged him, wrapping his own arms around the ginger, albeit much more loosely. 

     "Are you going to get home okay?" Kenma asked, pulling away to try and meet Shouyou's eyes. His friend nodded, pulling out his phone with a small smile.

     "Kageyama said he'd come pick me up when I was done with work. I'll call him and let him know we're closing early," he said, dialing his boyfriend's number as he spoke. Kenma nodded, satisfied with the plan, and sighed when Akaashi walked up to him, concern in his dark eyes.

     "I'm fine, really," he assured him, not wanting his friend and boss to worry about him. Akaashi gave him a look that said he'd worry anyway but nodded and left the topic alone, placing a hand on his shoulder before walking to the back of the store to his office.

     "You ready?" Kuroo asked in a soft voice when he came back, Kenma's coat in hand. Kenma nodded, murmuring his thanks when Kuroo helped him into his coat, and double checked with Shouyou about his way home before leaving with Kuroo.

     Kuroo immediately offered a hand to Kenma, who noticed a slight tremor in the limb but took it all the same. It had become a bit of a habit for them to hold hands while walking somewhere. At first, Kenma had rationalized it as a way to keep his hands warm, but he had long since given up on that excuse. It was just nice to know that Kuroo wanted to hold his hand.

     Kuroo walked Kenma to his apartment, something he'd done since their second date. But unlike usual, he didn't let go of his hand when they reached the building, staring down at the sidewalk below them. "Can I..." he paused, glancing up at Kenma nervously. "Can I come up? I don't really want to leave you, yet." He raised his a hand in front of him, showing Kenma the tremors that had only grown stronger, and gave him a bashful smile. "Still shaky."

     Kenma couldn't help the soft smile that twitched onto his lips in response. "Sure," he said, tugging Kuroo to the stairs by the hand. "You can meet Frank." Kuroo grinned at the mention of Kenma's cat and nodded.

     Frank made his presence known as soon as Kenma opened the door to his apartment, babbling as he came running from wherever he'd been napping to greet his owner. He paused mid-step when he saw Kuroo, staring up at the taller man curiously.

     Kuroo knelt down and offered a hand out to the cat. "Hey there, Frank. I've heard a lot about you, ya know," Frank's ears pricked forward at the sound of his name, and Kenma chuckled at the cat's slow crawl forward. He sniffed at Kuroo fingers for a few seconds before meowing and pushing his head into the offered hand.

     Kuroo grinned up at Kenma brightly, clearly pleased with himself, and stroked his fingers through Frank's short fur. "I'm impressed. He bit Shouyou's boyfriend when they came over for the first time," Kenma snorted, remembering the shriek that had left Kageyama that day.

     "What? This guy? Never," Kuroo cooed at the ginger cat, picking him up to cradle him in his arms as he stood. "He just wants some lovin'." Frank lounged in Kuroo's arms, content to stay there for the foreseeable future, and Kenma rolled his eyes as he moved to the kitchen. The minute he pulled out a can of food and opened it, Frank jumped down from his temporary bed and bolted to the kitchen.

     Kuroo gasped and put a hand to his chest in mock pain. "I feel so betrayed!" Kenma rolled his eyes again and shrugged.

     "Frank's loyalty only lasts as long as his food bowl is full," he explained, walking over to take Kuroo's coat. "Do you want something to drink? Something to eat?" Kuroo shook his head and stayed silent until Kenma had hung both of their coats up by his door.

     "Um," Kenma turned at the uncertainty in Kuroo's voice, "can I...hug you? Or something?" He blinked up at the taller man, surprised by the question. Kuroo brought a hand up to rub at the back of his neck. "Sorry, I just get kinda weird after stuff like what happened today and it makes me feel better. You know, if I know the person. Never mind. It's stupid-"

     "Yes."

     "Hmm?" Kuroo looked up at Kenma in question. Kenma back tracked, suddenly feeling bashful himself.

     "Um, yes. You can hug me." He took a small step closer to Kuroo. "I don't mind." Kuroo let out a breath, his shoulders slumping in relief, and closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around him. Kenma tensed for a moment as his heart hammered in his chest, not used to having someone this close other than Shouyou, but he relaxed when Kuroo ducked his head down and pressed his face into his neck, bringing his arms up to rest over Kuroo's shoulders.

     "I was scared," Kuroo whispered, like he was telling Kenma a secret. "You can't do that again. My hair will go grey prematurely." Kenma snorted a soft laugh and turned to press his face into the black hair brushing his cheek.

     "Please, you'd die before you let your hair go grey." He was quiet for a moment before he spoke again, his voice shaking. "I was scared, too. I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there." It was the truth. (Shouyou wasn't exactly the best person to be with in a stressful situation.)

     Kuroo let out a breath and slowly started to raise his head, lips skimming up the skin of Kenma's neck and jaw to hover over his mouth. They stared at each other for a beat of silence, Kenma sure the other could feel the heat coming off his face, until he glanced at Kuroo's lips. Kuroo closed the space between them slowly, giving Kenma a chance to pull away, but that was the last thing Kenma wanted.

     The kiss was gentle, their lips moving against each other's softly while they tried to get comfortable, and Kenma tried to calm his racing heart. Kuroo raised a hand to cup Kenma's jaw, tilting his head up just a bit, and Kenma let his eyes flutter shut, pulling the taller man closer.

      Kuroo went easily, dropping a hand to Kenma's waist, and the blonde gasped when he felt a nip at his bottom lip, letting Kuroo in with a soft moan. Kuroo pushed forward, moving Kenma back until he was pressed against the wall behind him, and suddenly alarms blared in Kenma's head.

     He jerked away, shoving Kuroo back so that there was space between them, and desperately tried to catch his breath. "I'm sorry," he gasped, "I...I can't-" Memories of being pushed to his knees and his mouth forced open flashed behind his eyelids every time he blinked. He slid down the wall until he was sitting, pushing the heels of his palms into his eyes to try and drive away the horrifying visions.

     "Kenma?" Kuroo's voice came from in front of him, concern clear in his tone. "Hey, what's wrong?"

     Kenma shook his head and bit his bottom lip, tears slipping through his lashes for the second time that day. "I'm sorry." It was all he could think to say. Here Kuroo was, a nice, trustworthy man right in front of him, and Kenma couldn't get the guy who'd fucked him up out of his head.

     Kuroo pried Kenma's hands away from his face gently. "Hey, look at me," he whispered. "What's wrong? Do you want me to leave?"

      "No!" His shout surprised even Kenma himself, and one of his hands shot out to grab a handful of Kuroo's shirt, holding on like it was a lifeline. Kuroo was good. Kuroo was kind and sweet and would help him. "No, please. Don't leave me."

     Kuroo watched him closely for a moment. "What do you need?"

     Kenma looked up at him through his tears, wrapping his arms around his shaking body. He needed comfort; he needed someone to make him feel safe. "You. I need you closer, but I...I cant-"

     "Okay, okay," Kuroo murmured to him, gently pulling him forward to lean into his chest. "I've got you. It's alright."

     Kuroo stayed with him, kneeling on the floor until he calmed down, however long that was Kenma didn't know. He coaxed him to his feet and lead him down the hallway to his bedroom when his tears dried, helping the shaking man into his bed after taking his shoes off. He hesitated for a second, but after Kenma reached a hand out to him, he took his own shoes off too, laying down next to him.

     Kuroo pulled him close, letting him bury his face in his chest. "Is this okay?" he murmured softly, and Kenma nodded, wrapping a handful of Kuroo's shirt into his fist.

     "I'm sorry," Kenma hiccuped, sniffling into the fabric. Kuroo hushed him, rubbing hand soothingly up and down his back.

     "You have nothing to be sorry for. Just get some sleep." Kenma closed his eyes and did what Kuroo said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Gasp!* KuroKen first kiss! And it's ruined by Kenma's past coming back to haunt him! But, hey, how about med-school student Kuroo being calm and collected during a crisis situation, eh?
> 
> Thanks for reading! And as always, let me know what you thought!


	6. Loose Lips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma spills the beans about his past, and Bokuto lets something slip that Kuroo hadn't told Kenma yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There's some mention of past sexual abuse in the beginning of this chapter. Again, not very explicit and pretty brief, but I just wanted to let you all know.
> 
> Thank you for reading! Please enjoy!

     Kenma woke slowly from a heavy sleep the next morning, curling into the warmth in front of him to try and soothe himself into slumber again. He froze when he felt someone playing with his hair, his memories from the day before flooding back to him, and slowly peeked up at Kuroo. The dark haired man smiled down at him softly, watching Kenma with gentle eyes as he used an arm to lean his head on.

     "Good morning, Kitten," Kuroo whispered to him, rubbing a warm hand along Kenma's back. "Akaashi sent you a text. Said Dog-Eared was closed until further notice." He glanced out the window behind Kenma. "It snowed last night. The power's out."

     Kenma hummed in acknowledgement, lifting a hand to rub at his cry-swollen eyes. He didn't want to say anything, worried the sound of his voice would trigger a conversation about what happened the night before. He didn't want to talk about it, too afraid it would scare Kuroo away. He didn't want that. Kuroo was one of the only good things in his life; he'd finally managed to let the pun-loving man in. But Kuroo seemed to have other ideas.

     "You wanna tell me what happened last night?" Despite the soft tone Kuroo used, Kenma tensed, trying his best to keep from hyperventilating.

     "Not really, but I owe you an explanation," he mumbled and looked up when Kuroo shook his head.

     "You don't owe me anything," he told him, voice sincere, "but I would appreciate it if you did." Kenma blinked rapidly in an attempt to keep the tears those words had brought to his eyes at bay, but he was fighting a losing battle. He opened his mouth to take a breath, and it was like a dam burst. Words flooded out of his mouth in a rush.

     "I had a boyfriend two years ago," Kuroo's chest tensed under his hands, the dark haired man probably already guessing where the story was going. "He was abusive. He...he used to hit me and make me do...things. He only used my mouth and hands, he never actually...." A sob cut him off, but he pushed on, wanting to get it out now that Kuroo knew. "That's why I freaked out like I did. He used to push me up against a wall and shove me to my knees and...I'm sorry."

     "Why do you keep apologizing? You've done thing wrong." Kenma cried harder at Kuroo's words, and the arms around him tightened, pulling him closer. "Oh, baby," Kuroo breathed in a strangled voice, a few tears of his own slipping down his cheeks, and pressed a kiss to Kenma's forehead.

     "I was just worried that you wouldn't want to be with me because I couldn't handle certain things, that I've...done certain things," Kenma whimpered, shivering against the taller man's body.

     "You don't need to worry about what I want regarding that, Kenma. We'll go as slow as you need. You should have said something sooner." Kuroo pulled away just enough to look Kenma in the eyes. "I mean it. If I do something you don't like, let me know. I'll leave you alo-"

     "No!" Kenma shook his head vehemently, clutching at Kuroo's shirt tightly. "No, I'll never want that." He fiercely meant the words, desperate to get Kuroo to understand how he felt. There was no uncertainty when it came to Kuroo. The dark haired man was open about how much he cared for Kenma, no hidden meanings in his words. Kuroo was a godsend, heaven on Earth.

     "Alright, alright," Kuroo cooed to him, running a hand through his blonde hair. "I don't want that either." Kenma closed his eyes as Kuroo brushed his tears away with a thumb, his lips soon following their path.

     A sudden meow from the foot of the bed made them both jump, looking up to see Frank staring at them expectantly. Kenma huffed a watery laugh and sniffled. "Frank wants breakfast."

     Kuroo frowned in false anger at the cat and rolled his eyes. "Frankie, we talked about this. You're going to have to wait. I'm having a very important conversation with my boyfriend. Can't you see your mom and I are busy?" It was Kenma's turn to frown this time.

     "Mom? Why am I Frank's 'mom'?" The rest of Kuroo's statement caught up to Kenma after his question and he blushed, looking up at Kuroo with wide eyes. " _Boyfriend?_ "

     Kuroo blinked down at him for a moment before his face flushed beet red, seeming to finally realize what he'd said. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, doing the best impersonation Kenma had seen of a fish, before he cleared his throat and looked anywhere but Kenma's face. "Um, well, yeah. I was kinda hoping that it would be okay for me to, you know, call you that. And you can call me that, too. So we'd be together. As in, like, a couple...thing."

     Kuroo's obvious embarrassment and nervousness helped calm Kenma, feeling better knowing that the usually collected man could be flustered, too. "I'd like to be a couple thing with you," Kenma chuckled, reaching up to brush some of Kuroo's ridiculous bedhead from his face, and the dark haired man beamed down at him with a blinding smile as he cupped Kenma's jaw.

     "Can I kiss you?" he whispered, pausing for a moment before adding, "Please?" Kenma sucked in a sharp breath and held it in for a second before nodding, letting it out slowly as Kuroo leaned in to his face. He waited until the last second to close his eyes, burning the image of Kuroo's face into his mind, and he sighed when their lips touched.

     Kuroo kept the kiss soft and chaste, a simple peck on the lips, and pulled away with a small smile. He watched Kenma closely for a minute before the smile slipped from his face as he grew serious. "Kenma, I meant what I said. If I ever do something that you don't like or scares you, let me know. I want you to be comfortable with me."

     "I am comfortable with you," Kenma told him, looking him in the eyes so Kuroo would know he wasn't lying. "You make me feel safe. Last night was...." He shook his head. "I was just worried and scared of you finding out about my past. Only Shouyou, Kageyama, and Akaashi know."

     A scowl pulled Kuroo's lips down as anger flared in his eyes. "Who did that to you, Kenma? Tell me his name, so I can go find him." Kenma shook his head adamantly and sat up.

     "No, Kuroo. I moved so that I could get away from him, and I'm not letting him back into my life and into our relationship just because I still have issues because of what he did to me. I'm going to get better. You're going to help me get better." Kuroo blinked up at him, anger replaced with shock, and sighed after a moment.

     "Fine. But only because my  _boyfriend_ said so," he replied, grabbing Kenma's hand and tugging him back to his chest. "Speaking of boyfriends, I believe having that title gives me the right to demand morning cuddles." Kenma huffed in mock exasperation but still snuggled into Kuroo's warmth, face pressed into the taller man's neck.

     "Frank's not going to be happy about it," he muttered but had no intention of getting up any time soon. As if to prove him right, the ginger cat stalked up the bed and batted at Kuroo's hair, meowing insistently as if to say, "Hey, I'm hungry. Get up." Kuroo replied with a mumbled complaint, to which Frank answered with another meow. Kenma then proceeded to listen to a ten minute argument between his cat and his boyfriend, trying to ignore as much as possible and enjoy the arms wrapped around him.

\\\

     "Kuroo! Bro, I missed you so much!" Bokuto's voice bounced throughout the small coffee shop.

     "Bo, I thought I'd never see you again!" Both Kenma and Akaashi rolled their eyes at the other two's antics, getting comfortable at the table they had picked to sit at.

     "You saw each other literally less than seventy-two hours ago," Kenma muttered, taking a sip of his Chai tea. Akaashi hummed in agreement as the two overly dramatic friends embraced, pulling the seat out beside him.

     "Kenma-kun's right. Come sit down, Bokuto-san," he said calmly, taking a drink from his own cup. The grey and black haired man's head popped up from where it was resting on Kuroo's shoulder, a smile on his face.

     "Okay, Akaashi! Come on, bro." The two settled into the seats beside their boyfriends, Bokuto slinging an arm around Akaashi's shoulders while Kuroo took one of Kenma's hands. Kenma noticed Akaashi glance down at their joined hands, but he didn't say anything. 

     After Kenma and Kuroo's eventful morning together, Kuroo had stayed the rest of the day, making amends with Frank by feeding him and giving him treats while Kenma curled into his side. Kuroo had gone home that night, promising to stop by the next day after his classes. Akaashi had invited them to join he and Bokuto for coffee the next morning to discuss opening Dog-Eared.

     "I already talked to Hinata-kun over the phone about opening, but Bokuto-san wanted to see Kuroo-san," Akaashi explained and Bokuto nodded enthusiastically beside him, grinning at Kuroo.

     "I didn't think I'd get to see you this much after Undergrad school, Bo," Kuroo chuckled, grinning back at his friend. "It's nice." Bokuto agreed happily and took a swig of his coffee. The two friends started up a conversation about the benefits of pun-based jokes verses knock-knock jokes, and Akaashi turned to Kenma.

     "Despite the snow and ice still on the ground, I think I should be able to open the store. Is that alright with you?" he asked Kenma.

     Kenma nodded, trying to ignore the feeling Kuroo's hand wrapped around his own gave him. "I can get to work with very little trouble now. And my power's back on, so Frank should be okay."

     Bokuto turned to him at the cat's name. "You still have that thing? It's a demon!" He exclaimed, gesturing wildly with his cup, and Kenma scowled at him.

     "Just because he scratched you after you scared him doesn't mean he's a demon," he said darkly with a glare. "Maybe it'll teach you not to pick up an animal before they get comfortable around you."

     "That's true, Bo. You do have a bad habit of trying to show your affection for something by attacking it with a hug," Kuroo agreed, shrugging at his friend. He opened his mouth to say something else, but he was cut off when his phone rang. Kenma watched him as he dug the device out of his pocket, sure that he already knew who was calling his boyfriend.

     "Sorry, I have to take this," Kuroo said, standing up to go answer his phone. "It's my mom."

     "Tell her I said hi!" Bokuto cheered as the dark haired man walked off. Kenma followed him with his eyes, frowning softly. That was the twelfth time Kuroo's mother had called him in only two days. Even if the two of them were close, that still seemed excessive.

     "Kuroo's mother has been calling him an awful lot," he murmured, staring down at the table.

     "Well, it makes sense. What with the whole situation they're going through," Bokuto said softly, uncharacteristically serious. Kenma looked up at him in confusion, brow furrowing.

     "What do you mean? What situation? he asked, not sure what the usually hyperactive man was talking about. Akaashi glanced between the two of them, his eyes wide and a little panicked.

     "What, you don't know?" Bokuto asked, and Akaashi tried to interrupt.

     "Bokuto-san." But the grey and black haired man didn't seem to hear him as Kenma shook his head.

     "Know what?" Kenma sent a glance in the direction his boyfriend had gone, seeing the look of concern on his face that was almost ever-present when he spoke to his mother.

     Bokuto's eyes grew sad as he glanced at Kuroo, too. "Kuroo's mom has cancer."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, no! Poor Kuroo! What's going to happen? Stay tuned to find out!
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, please comment and leave kudos. I love reading every single one you all send me!


	7. A Long Awaited Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma and Kuroo's relationship grows as they tackle Kuroo's fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's some emotionally distraught Kuroo! Enjoy!
> 
> Thanks for reading! Hope you like it!

     Kenma glanced up at Kuroo as they walked back to his apartment from their meeting with Akaashi and Bokuto, trying to calm his racing heart. Why wouldn't Kuroo tell him something so important? Granted, they had only just officially started dating, but that seemed like an important detail. And Kenma had told him about his past, about the abusive ex, so why didn't Kuroo tell him about his sick mother?

     Another question that plagued Kenma's mind was how was he going to bring up the subject? The rest of them hadn't said anything about it when Kuroo had come back to their table, acting as if a bomb of information hadn't just been dropped on Kenma's head. It wasn't as if he would break up with the dark haired man, quite the opposite, actually. He wanted to be there for his boyfriend. It had to be so stressful and scary, and all he wanted to do was take care of Kuroo in any way he could.

     But if Kuroo hadn't told him yet, then that meant he didn't want Kenma to know. The only problem with that was that Kenma  _did_ know, and that meant he would wonder every time Kuroo's face flickered with pain, or concern, or worry if he was thinking about his mother. It had to be a terrible burden to bear.

     "What are you thinking so hard about down there?" Kuroo asked, smiling down at Kenma as they waited for the crosswalk to turn green. Kenma shook his head, tightening his grip on Kuroo's hand.

     "Nothing," he mumbled and moved closer to Kuroo as they walked forward, brushing past people going to other way. The taller man wrapped an arm around Kenma's shoulders and pulled him in to his side, shielding him from being bumped, and let the conversation dwindle. Kenma was sure he was used to his less-than-adequate social interaction skills. In fact, his hands were itching to pull out his phone and play a game in an attempt to drown out the nagging urge to blurt out that he knew what Kuroo had been keeping from him.

     "We're here." Kuroo's voice brought Kenma out of his thoughts, and he looked up to see that they were, in fact, standing in front of his apartment building. "Kenma? Hey, you okay?" He turned to Kuroo, the concerned look on his boyfriend's face making something in his chest squeeze.

     "Yeah, I'm fine," he sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. "You want to come up?" Kuroo nodded and helped him up the ice-slick stairs that led to his apartment, nearly slipping himself in the process.

     "I'm gonna go use the bathroom. Be right back," Kuroo said, laying his coat over the arm of Kenma's couch and leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead. Kenma plopped down on his couch and turned on his TV, flicking through the channels until he found one that wasn't annoying.

     A sudden shrill ringing startled Kenma, and he searched until he found the source of the noise. Kuroo's phone. He must've left it in his coat pocket. Kenma dug the device put and stared at the screen, reading the word 'Mom' that blared out at him.

     Before his mind caught up with his body, he had swiped the answer button and put the phone to his ear. "Hello?"

     The line was quiet for a while before a weak voice spoke. "Tetsurou?"

     "No, ma'am. Kuroo's in the bathroom. This is his..." Kenma paused, not knowing if Kuroo had told his mother about them yet, "friend."

     "His friend?" The voice asked, soft and curious.

     "Yes, ma'am. Kozume Kenma."

     The voice suddenly turned cheerful. "Oh! Kenma! Oh, Tetsurou talks about you so much. I was hoping I'd get to meet you before...." Kuroo's mother trailed off, not finishing her sentence. Kenma's heart clenched painfully in his chest.

     "Actually, ma'am, I'd very much like to meet you. If that's alright?" He didn't know what made him say it out loud. Of course he'd wanted to meet Kuroo's parents, but it seemed a little early. But with Kuroo's mother being so sick, he thought it was okay to admit it.

     The bathroom door opened, and Kenma caught movement out of the corner of his eye. He turned to see Kuroo staring at him, expression unreadable as he took in the sight of Kenma on his phone.

     "Of course, dear. I would love that. As long as you don't mind listening to an old woman ramble on," Kuroo's mother chuckled softly, and Kenma grinned a little, imagining that Kuroo got his sense of humor from his mother.

     "I'd love to meet you ma'am," Kenma repeated, noticing Kuroo's eyes widen at his words, from shock or fear he wasn't sure. "I'm sure you have some embarrassing stories about Kuroo."

     Kuroo's mother laughed. "Oh, I have some doosies." The line was quiet again for a moment. "Well, I'll let you go. Just...tell Tetsurou that I love him." Kenma's chest ached.

     "Of course ma'am. I'll be sure to let him know," he promised, watching Kuroo watch him. "I look forward to meeting you."

     "I look forward to meeting you too. Goodbye, Kenma."

     "Goodbye, ma'am." And with that, Kuroo's mother hung up, and Kenma was faced with the silence that echoed in his apartment. He waited for a moment before he spoke, cautious about what to say to Kuroo. "Your mother said she loves you," he told him, returning the phone to Kuroo's coat pocket.

     "She always does," Kuroo said, slowly moving to sit down next to Kenma on the couch and running a hand through his hair. "So, you know? About her...illness?"

     Kenma nodded and clenching his fingers in his jeans, not sure if Kuroo was okay with being touched right now. "Are you angry with me?" Kenma waited anxiously for Kuroo's answer. Eventually, his boyfriend took a deep breath, shaking his head as he let it out.

     "No. I'm just...surprised. I thought I'd have more time before you found out." Kuroo glanced up at him. "How _did_  you find out?"

     "Bokuto," Kenma replied, and Kuroo sighed.

     "Of course it was Bo. I love him, but that guy can't keep his mouth shut the save his life," the dark haired man chuckled, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.

     Kenma paused, hesitant to break the silence between them. "How bad is it?"

     Kuroo let out a shaky breath, his shoulders hitching a bit. "Stage four. It's in her lungs." When he looked up at Kenma, his eyes were rimmed red and too wet. "She smoked a lot before I was born."

     "When did you find out?" Kenma wanted to hold him, wanted to share this pain with his boyfriend, but Kuroo was very purposefully not touching him.

     "She was diagnosed when I was in Undergrad. Tried to keep it from me. But with the classes I was taking, I knew the signs. I pretended I didn't know, though. Let her believe she was hiding it. Until she got too sick and started losing her hair." Kuroo shook his head again, a little stronger this time. "It was okay for a while, then. We could almost pretend that everything was okay. But now...."

     Kuroo finally broke, sobbing into his hands, and Kenma couldn't take it any more. He stretched out a hand and touched Kuroo's shoulder, tugging on his shirt. The dark haired man went willingly now, reaching out to Kenma with both arms and burying his face in his chest.

     "I don't know what to do," Kuroo whimpered, his voice raw. "I'm so scared. Every time my phone rings, I think it's going to be someone telling me she's dead." Kenma squeezed him close, his own tears streaming down his cheeks.

     "Why didn't you tell me before? You don't have to deal with this on your own," Kenma whispered to the shaking man, trying to comfort him in any way he could.

     Kuroo shook his head. "I didn't want to make you worry. You're already going through so much."

     Kenma frowned, pulling Kuroo's head back so that he could look him in the eye. "I'm here for you, no matter what. You can lean on me, too." Kuroo sniffled as he looked up at him through his tears, still shaking. "We'll get through this. Together."

     Kuroo stayed over that night, too.

\\\

     By the end of that week, there was a plan made for Kuroo to take Kenma with him to meet his mother the next time he went to visit. She didn't live far, just a short train ride away. Kuroo explained to Kenma that his mother had decided to have assisted living, rather than move in with her son. Despite his protests, she'd insisted that she would bother him and had wanted him to live without worrying about her in his own home. That didn't stop Kuroo from worrying about her, though.

     Kenma tried his best to keep from dozing off as he leaned his head on Kuroo's shoulder, but he was fighting a losing battle. They needed to leave at nearly 6 am to be able to show up when Kuroo's mother was awake, which was usually around 7:30 because she went to bed and woke up early.

     "You can take a nap," Kuroo whispered to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulder to pull him in closer. "It's about a forty-five minute ride, so you have time." Kenma wanted to stay awake and keep Kuroo company, but it was nearly impossible. He had never been a morning person, and the soft rocking of the train on the tracks and Kuroo's body heat were lulling him to sleep.

     Before he knew it, Kuroo was gently shaking him awake. Kenma blinked the sleep from his eyes, looking up when lips brushed his forehead softly. Kuroo smiled down at him, small and genuine. "Hey, Kitten. You have a good nap?"

     Kenma nodded stretched an arm over his head, groaning at the pull of his muscles. "Are we close?" he asked, covering his mouth as he yawned.

     "Yeah," Kuroo murmured, tucking a stray lock of hair behind Kenma's ear. "It's the next stop." Kenma blushed at the action, still getting used to how affectionate his boyfriend was. He stood when Kuroo did, automatically reaching out for the taller man's hand before he could even think about the movement. He noticed Kuroo try to hide a smile as he took Kenma's outstretched hand, but he didn't do a good job.

     They made it off the train and out of the station easily enough, and Kuroo expertly led them through the streets hand-in-hand with Kenma. "I've been here so much I don't even have to look where I'm going now," the dark haired man mused as they walked. Kenma hummed in acknowledgement, content to let Kuroo talk for the both of them to get his nerves out.

     "She usually stays in bed most days. But sometimes she sits in the garden, or if she has a really good day she plays some piano. When I was a kid, she'd play all the time, and it was always something that made you want to dance," he murmured, and Kenma held his hand tighter.

     Kuroo grew quieter the longer they walked. Soon enough, he stopped talking all together. Kenma didn't mind, though. He figured Kuroo was gathering his thoughts and preparing himself. It gave Kenma a chance to think about how he should act. He still wasn't sure if Kuroo had told his mother about them, and he didn't want to assume anything and make it awkward. Sure, Kuroo had talked about him to his mother, but that didn't mean he'd told her they were in a relationship.

     "We're here," the tall man said, stopping them in front of a small cottage. At the moment, there was snow on the roof and covering the yard. While it was still beautiful, Kenma could imagine how lovely it would be in the spring when the flowers bloomed. Kuroo helped him up the steps to the front door, knocking softly before stepping back.

     The door opened to reveal a blonde haired woman in her forties with a bright smile. "Tetsurou, I'm so glad you could make it!" She stepped forward and pulled Kuroo into a hug, the dark haired man returning the embrace with equal vigour. When they pulled away, she turned to Kenma.

     "Ah, Mrs. Nancy, this is Kenma. Kenma, this is Mrs. Nancy," Kuroo introduced the two. "Mrs. Nancy is the nurse who helps my mom. Been with us for quite a few years, now. She's practically part of the family."

     "It's nice to meet you," Kenma murmured with a small smile, the blonde woman reminding him a bit of Shouyou.

     "It's nice to meet you, too, Kenma," Mrs. Nancy replied, quickly waving them in. "She's had a pretty good morning. Kept her breakfast down." Kuroo's eyes lit up at the words, a small smile forming on his lips as he hung both he and Kenma's coats up in a closet by the front door. "She's in the bedroom."

     Kuroo made a B-line in the direction Mrs. Nancy pointed, and Kenma followed behind him on silent feet. The dark haired man knocked softly on the bedroom door as he opened it, poking his head through with a soft, "Hello?"

     "Hey, baby," a woman's voice gasped, a smile clear in her tone, and as Kenma stepped closer he saw who was speaking. Kuroo's mother was a beautiful woman, regardless of her illness. A soft, genuine smile pulled at Kuroo's lips as he stepped into the room, Kenma following a few steps behind.

     "Hey, Momma. I heard you were feeling better today. That true?" It was almost comical to watch the tall, lanky man settle himself on the edge of the bed where his mother was. Pillows were stacked behind her so that she could sit up with ease. Kuroo took one of his mother's hands in his own, and she grinned up at him, raising her free hand to touch his cheek.

     "Better than I've been in a while," she confirmed, glancing around Kuroo's broad shoulders at Kenma. "And this must be Kenma."

     Kenma froze when mother and son turned to look at him, and he had to fight the urge to fidget with the bottom of his sleeves at the attention. "Yes, ma'am," he replied, moving so that he could stand next to the bed. Now that he was closer, he could see oxygen tubes disappearing into her nostrils.

     Kuroo's mother snorted and waved a hand at him. "Please, dear, call me Kayoko." Kenma smiled at her, nodding his head. "I've wanted to meet you so badly. Tetsurou's told me all about you. Said you were the most adorable thing he'd ever seen. I can see he wasn't lying." Both Kenma and Kuroo blushed at her words.

     "Mom, seriously?" Kuroo grumbled, looking at the quilt covering his mother's feet. Kayoko laughed at her son and rolled her eyes.

     "Kuroo's pretty adorable himself," Kenma replied, sending an amused glance at his boyfriend. Kayoko grinned up at him, her eyes softening as Kuroo took Kenma's hand and kissed his knuckles, making Kenma's face flushed bright red.

     "Yes, he is," she sighed, and all three of them talked and talked. Eventually, Kenma even pulled a chair up next to the bed so he could sit, discussing Kuroo's childhood with his boyfriend's mother. And throughout the entire visit, Kenma couldn't help by think:

      _Please, don't take her away._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter was so sad, but I wanted everyone to know that Kuroo has some.issues too.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! And as always, please don't be afraid to leave comments and kudos. They make my day!
> 
> P. S. Now that classes have started it might be a little difficult for me to keep up with the pace I've had recently. I'll do my best, but please be patient!


	8. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma's ready to take their relationship to the next level. And Kuroo's not about to complain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first real attempt at smut, so please be gentle.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Here ya go! As promised, SMUT!

     After the first meeting with Kuroo's mother, Kenma went with Kuroo every time he visited her. Unless Kuroo asked him not to. Sometimes she had bad days, and if that happened Kuroo didn't want Kenma to have to see her like that. At first, he had protested. Kenma had said he wanted to be there for Kuroo, and he'd meant it. But after Kuroo explained that it was easier for him to only have to focus on his mom and no one else, Kenma understood.

     It hurt him sometimes to see Kuroo so exhausted and upset when he came to Kenma's apartment after a visit, though. He didn't know what was wrong, so he wasn't sure how to help. The best he could do was sit with his boyfriend while he did his homework and try to keep him from nodding off.

     At least that was something he could help Kuroo with. While he didn't understand the dark haired man's complex medical school homework, Kuroo had a nasty habit of procrastinating because he was too anxious to work. He'd told Kenma once that he felt better when someone was simply in the room beside him. So, that's what Kenma did. When Kuroo had homework he didn't feel confident in, he came over to Kenma's and did it at his apartment while Kenma snuggled up against him and played a game. It very quickly became a routine.

     "Hey, Kitten," Kuroo greeted as Kenma opened his front door, bending down for a kiss. Kenma rolled his eyes at the now-official nickname that Kuroo seemed so attached to.

     "Do you have a lot today?" Kenma asked, eyeing the backpack thrown over one of Kuroo's shoulders. The dark haired man shrugged, placing his bag on the floor so he could take off his coat. Kenma hung the article of clothing by his door and moved to wrap his arms around Kuroo's middle, and Kuroo chuckled and returned the gesture.

     Kenma had been trying his best to be more affectionate towards his boyfriend, trying to work his way up to bigger displays, and he was making good progress. Just the other day, they'd even been able to make out on the couch without his heart racing for any other reason than Kuroo's hands on his waist and in his hair. Now that he was in a healthy relationship, Kenma had begun to look forward to those moments. It didn't hurt that Kuroo was sex on legs.

     In fact, even now, when Kuroo was only wearing a pair of worn jeans and a very well-loved hoodie, Kenma still felt the itch to kiss Kuroo within an inch of his life. He was hesitant, though. Kuroo had always been the one to initiate things so far, and Kenma didn't know how the other would react if he started something.

     "It's mainly a lot of essay questions," Kuroo explained, settling in his usual spot on the couch. Kenma nodded and made his way to the kitchen.

     "Did you eat lunch?" he asked, already pulling out the leftovers from the takeout they got the other night. He'd long since figured out that asking Kuroo if he was hungry was a bad idea, because the dark haired man had a bad habit of ignoring his bodily needs when school work or his mother was involved.

     "I...grabbed a snack at Mom's," Kuroo muttered as he pulled out his textbooks, and Kenma frowned at him.

     "Translation: 'No, Kenma. I haven't eaten at all today.' Right?" He didn't even need to look to see the guilty expression on Kuroo's face as a sound of confirmation came from the living room. He sighed as he heated the food in the microwave, cursing Kuroo's inability to take care of himself. Kenma was surprised he hadn't passed out yet.

     Once Kuroo had eaten, Kenma felt better. He held off on his lecture about eating right to stay healthy, though. Kuroo already knew more about a proper diet than he did and was too focused on his homework for Kenma to willingly interrupt him. Besides, he really enjoyed watching Kuroo bite his bottom lip when he came across a particularly difficult question.

     His hand held was left forgotten in his lap as he stared up at Kuroo from his spot by his side. He watched a long-fingered hand rake through sufficiently ruffled hair in frustration as Kuroo huffed, a crease forming inbetween his eyebrows. Kenma fought the rising urge to smooth the wrinkle out with his fingers, too busy watching Kuroo's tongue peek out to swipe at his now-swollen lip. The sound of Kuroo's pencil scratching across his paper filled the air as he wrote, but Kenma barely even noticed it. He was imagining the way the skin of Kuroo's jaw would taste as he kissed along the sharp edge of it.

     Kenma's eyelids drooped as warmth coiled in his belly, his cheeks flushing when the sound of Kuroo groaning in anger sent a shiver down his spine. The dark haired man sighed and put his pencil down, looking about ready for a break. He turned to Kenma with a curious look when the blonde tugged on his sleeve, letting out a squeak of surprise when their lips touched. Kenma felt him smile a little, returning the kiss gently, before moving to pull away. Kenma was having none of that. 

     A noise of interest left Kuroo as Kenma tugged him back in for another kiss by the front of his hoodie, lips insistent, and Kenma felt a hand cup the side of his face as the kiss heated. Feeling brave, he nipped at Kuroo's lip, relishing in the soft moan he was rewarded with, and summoned up all the courage he had in his small body before gently pushing Kuroo to lean against the back of the couch. With no hesitation at all, he lifted himself to his knees and swung a leg over Kuroo's hips, settling in the taller man's lap with ease.

     He didn't give his boyfriend a chance to speak, least he break the spell Kenma had put himself under. He attacked Kuroo's mouth with his own, biting at his plump lips until they opened with another moan, and they could taste each other better. Kuroo's hands fell to his hips, squeezing every once in a while as they kissed.

     Kenma broke away from the kiss to trail his lips down Kuroo's cheek to his jaw, finally tasting the skin he'd been thinking about for hours. He bit down gently at first, and then harder when Kuroo let out a hoarse groan, sucking a mark there.

     "Fuck, Kitten," Kuroo breathed, his chest heaving as his breath rushed in and out of him. "What brought this on?"

     "You bite your lip when you do your homework," Kenma murmured by way of explanation, biting and sucking a new mark under the one he'd just made. Kuroo groaned again, his throat vibrating against Kenma's lips, and his back arched to press closer to Kenma.

     Kuroo guided him back up by his chin, taking control of the kiss easily, and Kenma moaned quietly into his mouth. He reached up and slid his hands into Kuroo's inky locks, tugging on the strands as he rocked his hips down.

     Kuroo pulled back, letting out a broken moan that went straight to Kenma's groin, and his grip on Kenma's hips tightened. He repeated the action, hoping for the same result, and wasn't disappointed when Kuroo stuttered out a curse.

     "Shit, Kenma," Kuroo whispered heatedly, leaning forward to rest his forehead against Kenma's collarbone. "You gotta tell me if you want to stop. Right now. You're too-" He cut off when Kenma ground his hips down again, letting out a shaky groan. Kenma's breath stuttered when Kuroo mouthed at his neck, teeth brushing against his skin.

     "I don't want to stop," he said confidently, and he meant it. He'd thought about taking this step with Kuroo, had prepared himself mentally for it, and he trusted Kuroo. He knew that the other man wouldn't take advantage of him. Kuroo sucked in a breath sharply and pulled back, looking Kenma in the eye.

     "Are you sure? Don't push yourself for me. I can wait as long as you need," Kuroo told him, moving a hand up to cup Kenma's face like he was something precious. Kenma leaned into Kuroo's hand, turning to kiss his palm with a nod.

     "Yes," he pinned the dark haired man with his heated gaze, shifting forward so he could brush his lips against Kuroo's ear. "I want you, Kuroo. Please."

     Air rushed past Kenma's ears, and suddenly he was on his back, pressed into the couch cushions below him. Kuroo settled over him with an expression that made Kenma moan in anticipation, his eyes dark and filled with all sorts of promises. Kuroo watched him with unwavering focus as he slid his hands down to his thighs, pulling them up and around his hips.

     Kuroo leaned down and thoroughly kissed Kenma senseless, using teeth and tongue to bring him to a moaning mess. Kenma vaguely felt a hand brush against his side before Kuroo's warm fingers raked his shirt up to his ribs, brushing a thumb over one of his nipples until it pebbled. He moaned and arched his back at the sensation, sitting up when Kuroo tugged on his shirt and helping him pull it off.

     Kenma reached for Kuroo's shirt, too, wanting to see the muscles that he'd felt so many times. Kuroo complied, leaning back so he could shuck the fabric over his head and throw it to the side, and Kenma couldn't help but press him palms against the exposed flesh. He felt Kuroo's chest expand with a sharp breath at the skin-to-skin contact.

     His eyes roamed over Kuroo's upper body, tan skin stretched over firm muscles making his blood rush south until he was throbbing. Kuroo came back to him, placing a soft kiss on his mouth before trailing his lips down to Kenma's neck. He tilted his head to the side, giving Kuroo plenty of room, and couldn't help but cry out when he felt teeth close around his skin. He felt blood rush to the surface as Kuroo sucked a dark mark into his skin, swiping his tongue across it soothingly.

     "Kuroo," Kenma whimpered as the man's lips trailed lower, his tongue poking out to barely ghost over one of his nipples.

     "Tell me what you want, Kitten," the dark haired man murmured, his voice a low rumble in his chest. Kenma gasped at the sound, shutting his eyes tight for a moment to get ahold of himself.

     "Touch me. Please, Kuroo." He barely recognized his own voice with how desperate it was. Kuroo barely waited for him to finish talking before he bent down and took one of his nipples in his mouth, sucking and flicking his tongue over it. Kenma moaned openly, fingers curling into Kuroo's hair, pulling him closer in a demand for more of the feeling. Fingers touched his other nipple, making his back arch as they twisted it gently. But when Kuroo's teeth closed over the nub his mouth was occupied with, Kenma writhed, crying out in pleasure.

     Kenma whined when Kuroo pulled away, rolling his hips into Kuroo's in search of friction against his aching cock. "Fuck," Kuroo gasped, rocking into Kenma. "We need less clothes."

     Kenma nodded frantically, his hands flying to undo Kuroo's jeans, but Kuroo beat him to it. He froze when fingers touched his hips, tracing the skin just above the edge of his sweat pants, and he gasped when Kuroo reached around and dipped his hands into the back of his pants to grip his ass. He moaned when Kuroo used the hold on his ass to grind their hips together, getting a sense of satisfaction at how hard Kuroo was against him.

     "Kuroo, please." He tried to pull away from the friction, his hips still moving despite himself. "I'm gonna cum." It had been too long since Kenma had done something like this, whether with another person or by himself.

     "Then cum," Kuroo told him, rocking harder against him as he slid a hand up to play with one of Kenma's nipples again. Kenma threw his head back against the cushions under him, mouth open in a silent cry, and Kuroo moaned above him as he moved. "Fuck, do you know how hot you are? Writhing like I'm already in you. And you're so sensitive. I bet I could make you cum just by playing with your nipples."

     As if to prove his point, Kuroo tweaked the nipple between his fingers, and with one more roll of his hips, he sent Kenma careening over the edge. Kenma cried out, spilling in his briefs, and Kuroo continued to move, prolonging his release as long as he could until he could take no more.

     "Stop, stop," Kenma gasped, shaking from the aftershocks of cumming after such a long time. Kuroo stilled and hovered over him, his chest still rising and falling rapidly, and Kenma could see how hard he still was.

     "Do you want to keep going?" The dark haired man asked, sweat beading on his forehead as he watched Kenma was lust-hazy eyes. Kenma blinked up at him, still trying to get his brain to work after cumming so hard.

     "I have condoms and lube in my bedroom," he said as an answer, his voice breathless. Kuroo smirked down at him darkly, making his heart race in the best way possible as his dick twitched with interest.

     "I'll take that as a yes," Kuroo murmured, scrambling off the couch and lifting Kenma in his arms. Kenma wanted to thank him, not sure if he would've been able to walk to his room, but lips were suddenly on his, effectively keeping him from talking.

     Kuroo laid him on the bed, making quick work of his sweats and briefs. Kenma shivered at the sudden cold that enveloped him, but he quickly forgot about it as Kuroo worked on his own jeans. He couldn't help but stare as the tall man slipped out of his jeans, long legs just as tan as the rest of him and his boxers tented impressively. It was then that Kenma noticed a large scar on Kuroo's right thigh, about six inches long and an inch wide. Before he could ask about it, Kuroo spoke first.

     "Like what you see?" Kuroo teased with a grin, playing with the elastic of his boxers. Kenma nodded, looking up at Kuroo through his lashes.

     "I'd like it better if I could touch," he whispered, already working his way to half hard again. Kuroo was on him in a heartbeat, slipping out of his boxers so that they could have full skin-on-skin contact and sucking a mark on his chest. They kissed for a while, the mood shifting from heated to gentle as Kuroo ran his hands all over Kenma's body, like he was memorizing every nook and cranny.

     Soon, Kuroo reached over to Kenma's nightstand and dug around in his drawer until he pulled out a small bottle of lube and a condom. He raised an eyebrow at Kenma was a good natured smirk, and Kenma blushed. "You been thinking about this for a while?" 

     Kenma shrugged and looked away. "I knew I could trust you, so I wanted to be prepared," he mumbled, surprised when Kuroo leaned forward to press a kiss to his forehead.

     "I did, too. Just in case." Kuroo kissed him, making Kenma's heart race when he popped open the bottle of lube. "Have you done this before?"

     Kenma nodded. He'd had boyfriends before the abusive ex, so he definitely wasn't a virgin. "But it's been a while," he breathed, trying not to flinch when Kuroo touched his entrance with a slick fingertip.

     "I'll go slow," Kuroo assured him, nipping at his neck as he pressed in gently. Kenma winced at the first initial stretch, trying his best to focus on where Kuroo's mouth was instead of the pain, and Kuroo rewarded him once he found a sensitive spot on Kenma's neck. He bit and sucked at his pale skin, leaving Kenma moaning and panting as his hands scrambled on the bed to find something to hold onto.

     Once Kuroo couldn't slide his finger in any further, he slowly started to thrust in and out, gently opening Kenma up. It wasn't long until he added another finger, mindful of whenever Kenma flinched. It was a process, they both knew, but when Kuroo had three in him, he twisted them just right. And Kenma screamed.

     "Ah! There! There, please, again," he sobbed, hips moving against Kuroo's hand to search out that pleasure. Kuroo smirked above him and curled his fingers, sending sparks and stars flashing behind Kenma's eyes. After a few more brushes against his prostate,  Kuroo pulled his fingers out, and Kenma couldn't stop a whine from leaving his mouth at the loss.

     "Shh, Kitten. I've got you," Kuroo hushed him, ripping open the condom with his teeth. Kenma moaned at the action, finding it unbelievably hot, and spread his legs more.

     "Please," Kenma begged, eyes glued to the way Kuroo rolled the condom on and slicked his dick with lube. "Kuroo, I want you."

     "I've got you," his boyfriend repeated, lining up with Kenma's entrance. "Tell me if I need to stop." And with that, he started pushing in slowly. Kenma did his best to stay relaxed, focusing on the way Kuroo's muscles rippled in his arms and chest, but every once in a while he couldn't help but whimper at a flash of pain. Kuroo stilled every time he did, giving him time to get adjusted, before slowly inching forward.

     Once Kuroo's hips met his ass, Kenma let out a breath, looking up at Kuroo to see his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes clamped shut. His fingers on Kenma's hips trembled and his chest heaved as he panted.

     "Fuck," Kuroo breathed, "you're so tight." Kenma whimpered again at his words, shifting his hips to try and get Kuroo to move already, but Kuroo stopped him. "Wait, don't-...You feel so good."

     Kenma stilled and waited for Kuroo to be ready, keeping himself preoccupied by watching Kuroo's abs flex with every breath. Finally, Kuroo pulled back a bit and thrust forward gently, and Kenma groaned at the feeling. It had been so long since he'd had anyone inside him, and he was glad he'd chosen Kuroo. The dark haired man was being so gentle with him, thrusts slow and hands soft against his skin.

     Kuroo angled his hips and used his hands to do the same to Kenma's, thrusting purposefully until Kenma writhed and threw his head back. "Found it," he said with a smirk, holding Kenma at that angle as he started to thrust harder.

     Kenma gasped and reached up to grip at tanned shoulders, pulling Kuroo down to him for a messy kiss that was more tongue and teeth than anything else. Kuroo groaned into his mouth, low and rough, and Kenma answered the noise with a desperate moan of his own.

     Kuroo's mouth was all over him, leaving marks on his chest and neck, and Kenma's cries pitched higher and higher with every thrust. "Kuroo, I-I'm...gonna cum. So close," he warned, voice urgent, and Kuroo moved a hand between them to pump his cock.

     "Me too," Kuroo whispered to him, breathing hot against his ear. Kenma moaned and moved with Kuroo, raking his nails down the strong back his hands had been pressed flush against. "Cum for me, Kenma."

     And he did just that, screaming his release. "Tetsurou!" Kuroo's hips stuttered against his as the dark haired man groaned, thrusting one last time before stilling deep inside Kenma, his muscles tense.

     "Kenma," Kuroo moaned, and another wave of pleasure washed over him at the sound of his name on the other's lips, Kuroo's hips giving small thrusts as he rode out his orgasm. Kenma's eyes fluttered shut at the aftershocks that trembled through his body as Kuroo rocked into him.

     Eventually, they both stilled and tried to catch their breath, Kuroo settling over Kenma so that he didn't crush him. Kenma whimpered as Kuroo pulled out carefully, taking off the condom and tying it off before throwing it away in the trashcan by Kenma's bed. He blinked his eyes open when he felt something rubbing against his stomach, looking up to see Kuroo wiping his cum off with his hoodie.

     Kuroo smiled down at him gently when he noticed Kenma looking at him, wiping himself off too before laying down beside him. He pulled Kenma into his chest, tugging the blankets over them, and Kenma sighed, content to stay where he was for the rest of his life. 

     "Thank you," Kuroo murmured to him, brushing some of his blonde hair away from his face, "For trusting me."

     Kenma hummed to him, eyes sliding closed with exhaustion. "Thank you for giving me a reason to." Kuroo's arms wrapped around him tightly, and Kenma couldn't think of a time when he felt safer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah, smut. Hooray! I figured you all deserved some after all the pain I've out you through.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! Let me know if you liked it. I love all of your comments and kudos! Stay tuned for more!


	9. An Unwelcome Reminder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma gets an unwelcome reminder of all the things he's been through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There is some almost rape towards the end of this chapter. Nothing explicit, but read at your own risk.
> 
> I figured I should treat you guys to some more smut after the good feedback I got from the last chapter. Also, I feel bad about what I had to do to poor Kenma later in the chapter.
> 
> So, here you go! SMUT!

     Kenma groaned as he struggled to come back to the waking world, everything in him demanding that he go back to sleep. The warm body next to him didn't help either. The shoulder he was pressed against shifted, and he looked up to see Kuroo's face stuffed between two pillows with on arm wrapped around Kenma's waist. If he wasn't still trying to get his brain to work he would have laughed at how absurd it looked.

     A meow from the foot of the bed caught his attention, and he looked up to see Frank staring at him with what looked like an impressed expression. Kenma glanced back at Kuroo's still sleeping form, taking in the scratches on his back, and nodded.

     "I know, right?" he whispered. "I think that was the best sex I've ever had." Frank flicked his tail at him as he jumped off the bed, as if to say 'I didn't need to hear that'.

     Kuroo groaned next to him, turning his head to blink at him sleepily. "Good to know I didn't disappoint," he mumbled, rolling over to scratch at his chest. "It's been a while for me, too." Kenma snorted, finding it hard to believe that someone like Kuroo hadn't had sex in a long time.

     "Yeah, and I'm a social butterfly," he huffed sarcastically, enjoying the morning stubble that had grown on Kuroo's jaw. The dark haired man shook his head, rubbing at an eye with the palm of his hand.

     "No, really. I haven't really had much time to...get out recently. You know, with Mom and school. Besides, I was more than willing to wait until you were ready once we started dating." Kuroo yawned and ran a hand over his face.

     "Speaking of school, when are your classes today?" Kenma asked, lifting one of Kuroo's arms so he could snuggle into his chest. Kuroo hummed at the attention and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

     "Not 'til 6. Late class tonight. All about blood born pathogens this week," he said, a fake cheerful tone in his voice.

     Kenma made a noise of in the back of his throat. "I forgot. You didn't finish your homework last night."

     "And whose fault is that?" Kuroo chuckled, burying his face into Kenma's hair. Kenma blushed and huffed softly, pressing his face into Kuroo's chest.

     "I don't remember you complaining," he mumbled, trying his best to hide his burning face.

     "You're right." Kuroo shrugged and pulled Kenma closer. "I would much rather have sex with my boyfriend than do my homework, and I'm not ashamed to admit it." Kenma rolled his eyes and stretched against Kuroo's warm chest.

     "Hmm, I need a shower," he sighed, making a face at the feeling of dried sweat all over his body.

     "Can I join you? I promise to be good." Kuroo grinned down at him and trailed his fingers lightly over his back. Kenma pretended to think about it, looking up at Kuroo suspiciously for a moment before nodding.

     "Might as well conserve water," he reasoned, letting the sheets slip off of him as he stood. He groaned at the ache in his lower back, not used to it anymore.

     "Sorry," Kuroo said from the bed, and Kenma turned to look back at him in question. "I may have been a little rougher than I planned." The dark haired man looked at him bashfully, scratching at the back of his head.

     Kenma shook his head. "Don't apologize. I didn't complain either. Quite the opposite, actually, if I remember correctly." His cheeks burned when his words caught up to him, and Kuroo chuckled as he stood too. Kenma definitely did **not**  stare at his boyfriend's naked form for an obscenely long amount of time. Nope, totally didn't. And he definitely didn't notice the little dimples that rested above said boyfriend's perky and toned ass.

     "Come on, Kitten," Kuroo all but purred to him as he made his way to the bathroom, and Kenma was quick to follow.

     The first few minutes passed innocently enough. Both of them washed their hair and helped each other with their backs. But when Kuroo's hands paused on his waist after making sure to rinse off all the soap, Kenma knew the dark haired man had other ideas for the rest of their time.

     Kenma tilted his head automatically when he felt lips against his neck, pressing kisses to the soft skin there. "What happened to 'being good'?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder. Kuroo chuckled and slid his hands lower, splaying his fingers over the tops of Kenma's thighs.

     "I said I'd be good. I never said anything about behaving myself," he murmured against Kenma's skin, tongue flicking out to lick at the moisture there. Kenma moaned and lifted a hand to clutch at the back of Kuroo's head, fingers curling into the short hair there.

     One of Kuroo's hands finally migrated to his cock, fingers wrapping around him with just the right about of pressure. He gasped, eyes slipping closed as the hand slowly moved over him, and Kuroo made a low noise of want behind him.

     "Kuroo," Kenma breathed, hips starting to roll into the taller man's fist, and he cried out and threw his head back against the shoulder behind him. Kuroo had lifted his free hand from Kenma's hips to tease one of his nipples, rubbing and pinching the sensitive nub.

     They stayed like that for a moment, Kuroo pumping him steadily as Kenma moved with him, moaning and whimpering as Kuroo sucked new marks into his neck. Once Kenma was hot and heavy in Kuroo's hand, though, the taller man turned him around and carefully pushed him back until he met the shower wall.

     Kenma looked up at him with wide eyes, heart suddenly racing for a different reason as memories flared in his head. "It's okay," Kuroo told him, voice calm and steady, and kissed the corner of his mouth. "I'm never going to make you do that. Ever." Kenma visibly relaxed and frowned at Kuroo in confusion.

     "Then what are you..." He trailed off when Kuroo's lips traveled down his neck, and then his chest, until the dark haired man was on his knees in front of him. Kenma stared down at him in awe, body hot at the sight before him.

     "Is this okay?" Kuroo murmured to him, peppering open-mouthed kisses along his left hip. Kenma shuddered at the brush of Kuroo's tongue against his skin and whimpered a yes, hands slipping on the wet tiles behind him.

     Kuroo glanced up at him, eyes half-lidded and dark for all the right reasons, and slid his hands up Kenma's legs until his fingers were splayed over the inside of his thighs. Kenma moaned and spread his legs more, panting when Kuroo ran his tongue up the underside of his dick. Lips wrapped around the head of his cock and Kenma cried out at the wet heat, hands scrambling for something to grip. Kuroo sunk down on him, sucking and using his tongue, and Kenma writhed, voice echoing in the small room.

     Kenma nearly jumped when he felt something touch his hand, Kuroo's fingers closing around his wrist and pulling his hand down to rest on his dark locks. He curled his fingers into Kuroo's hair, glad to have something to hold onto. Kuroo's throat vibrated with a groan around his cock when he tugged on what he could grasp, the taller man swallowing around him.

     "Ah, yes!" Kenma gasped, fighting the urge to close his eyes least he be robbed of the sight that was Kuroo staring up at him. He nearly sobbed when Kuroo pulled away, wanting that warm heat back around him.

     "Say my name, Kenma." He shuddered at the command, Kuroo's voice low and gravely.

     "Kuroo, plea-"

     "No," Kuroo growled, his eyes smouldering with desire as he watched Kenma. "Say. My. Name." Breath caught in his throat, all Kenma could do was nod and cry out when Kuroo went back to his task at hand, sucking Kenma deep into his throat.

     "Tetsurou," he choked out, hips twitching with the need to move. Kuroo made a sound of encouragement and moved his hands to cup Kenma's ass, pulling him forward a bit to show him what he wanted. Catiously, Kenma rolled his hips, sliding his cock through Kuroo's lips and down his throat, and Kuroo moaned, sucking harder.

     Kenma started thrusting in earnest after that, trusting that Kuroo knew what he could and couldn't handle. Soon, both his hands were tangled in inky locks, tugging at Kuroo's hair and scratching at his scalp, and Kuroo's hands were tight enough to bruise on his ass. He panted at the mounting pleasure roiling low in his stomach, his voice pitching higher and higher the closer he got.

     "Tetsu...gonna cum...." Kenma warned, knuckles turning white with how tight he was holding on to those dark locks. Kuroo hummed to him and shifted one of his hands, slipping a finger in the cleft of Kenma's ass. He brushed over Kenma's entrance, and that's all it took.

     Kenma keened, high and broken, his hips twitching against Kuroo's mouth as he came. Kuroo held him through his orgasm, swallowing and milking him of all he had, and Kenma whimpered and gasped as aftershocks rocked through him. He slipped out of Kuroo's mouth, shaky and boneless from his release, and soft sounds of pleasure came from below him.

     "Fuck," Kuroo gasped, and Kenma opened his eyes,  _when had he closed them?,_ and looked at him through his tears of pleasure. His breath stuck in his throat at the sight before him. Kuroo's arm jerked quickly as he slid his hand over his dick, the dark haired man moaning when he locked eyes with Kenma.

     Kenma's eyes traced over Kuroo's red mouth and mused hair. He looked utterly ravished as he panted up at Kenma, eyes lidded and begging while he worked to get himself off. Kenma reached a hand down, brushing his fingers over Kuroo's stubbled jaw, and cupped his boyfriend's face.

     "Cum for me, Tetsurou. I want to see it," he whispered hotly, still breathless from earlier. Kuroo moaned brokenly, his eyes clenching shut and his brow furrowing, and his mouth went slack as he finally came, spilling on the floor of Kenma's shower.

     "Shit," Kuroo gasped, slumping against the shower wall. Kenma nodded and ran a hand through his blonde hair, noticing that the water had turned cold.

     "We should get out," he mumbled, barely holding himself up on his jelly-like legs. Kuroo hummed in agreement, glancing up at him with a hopeful smile after a moment.

     "Cuddles?"

\\\

     Kuroo couldn't stay all day, unfortunately. He had to leave around 4 pm so he could get a change of clothes from his apartment and make it to his class on time. The time that he was over, though, made Kenma's day. They'd spent the rest of the morning tangled up with Frank on Kenma's couch, watching some medical show that Kuroo seemed fascinated by. But Kenma had hardly looked away from Kuroo's face the entire time.

     He wasn't used to this. He wasn't used to being in a healthy, loving relationship with someone who really cared about him. He could _get_  used to it, though.

     "I'll let you know when I get home after class," Kuroo promised as he paused in Kenma's doorway, bending down to press a kiss to his forehead.

     "Okay," Kenma murmured, watching Kuroo walk down the stairs and out of his apartment building. Usually he didn't have a problem when Kuroo left, content with the fact that his boyfriend would be back soon, but this time was different. He couldn't put his finger on the reason why, though.

     It wasn't until Kenma caught Frank pawing at something under the couch that he thought he found that reason. It was Kuroo's textbook. They must have kicked it there by accident the night before. Kenma glanced at the clock on his wall, seeing that it was almost 5:30.

     Kenma spat out a curse and scrambled to his feet, running around to throw on his shoes and coat before grabbing his wallet and hurrying out the door. He knew where Kuroo's university was, so he rushed out of his apartment building to catch a cab. Once he managed to flag one down, he told the cabbie the address and sat back, drumming his fingers against the cover of Kuroo's textbook. 

     It wasn't until he was standing at the entrance of the university that Kenma realized that he had no idea where Kuroo's class was. He stood there for a few minutes, trying to decide what he should do. He could text Kuroo, ask him what building and room number his class was in, but decided against it after checking his phone and seeing that it was already 6:15. Kuroo's class had already started, and he didn't want to interrupt it.

     "Hey." Kenma jumped at the sudden voice that filled the air around him. He looked in the direction it had come from and saw a guy standing a few yards away from him, a back pack thrown over one of his shoulders.

     "Hello," he replied quietly, pulling his shoulders up to his ears in an attempt to make himself less noticeable. Outside of his job, Kenma had a hard time talking to strangers. Especially after what happened with his ex.

     The guy walked up to him, a friendly grin on his face, and stopped beside him. "You lost?" Kenma debated lying to him. He didn't know this person. But Kuroo needed his textbooks, and this guy was obviously a student here. Maybe he could help. Kenma settled on giving a small nod in reply.

     "Great!" Kenma looked at the stranger oddly, and the guy backtracked. "I mean, I can help you. I live on campus, so I know my way around pretty well. What are you trying to find?"

     Kenma showed him the textbook in his hands, keeping his eyes down. "I need to give this to one of the students here. His name is Kuroo Tetsurou." Recognition sparked in the guy's eyes.

     "Ah, Kuroo-san! Yeah, I can take you to him. I know his schedule. We're in a class together this semester." Kenma looked up in surprise, finally seeing a ray of hope for getting Kuroo's book to him.

     "Really?" Kenma asked, looking up at the stranger with wide eyes. "Well, then let's hurry. His class started a few minutes ago, and I'm sure he needs his book." The guy nodded and gestured with his head in the direction they needed to go.

     "My name's Mori, by the way. You?" The guy, Mori, glanced at him with a smile.

     "Kenma," he replied, following Mori with a respectful distance between them. Mori nodded and shifted the bag on his shoulder. They walked in silence for a while, Mori holding onto his backpack and Kenma clutching Kuroo's textbook to his chest.

     After about a close to ten minute walk, Mori finally spoke. "Kuroo-san is in the Med. Building. Just over there."

     "Ah, thank you." Kenma moved to walk around Mori, ready to give Kuroo his book, but a hand grabbed his arm, effectively stopping him.

     "Thing is," Mori said, his voice suddenly dropping and taking on a tone that sent ice through Kenma's veins, "Kuroo-san marked you up pretty good, which means that you must be something worth fighting for." Mori's smile had seemed friendly before, but now, standing on the barely-lit sidewalk, it just looked threatening.

      _When did it get so dark?_ Kenma thought to himself, casting terrified glances at the dark buildings around them. Surely someone would come out soon and stop this. Mori drug him backwards by the arm until he was pressed against a cool wall, the taller man looming over him.

     "Please stop," he breathed, his voice trembling almost as bad as his hands. "Don't do this." Kuroo's textbook falling from his hands and hitting the sidewalk was a distant sound in his ears.

     Mori either didn't hear him or ignored him, because he crowded Kenma even more, pressing up to him chest-to-chest and sliding a leg between his thighs. Kenma's heart fluttered in his chest and his vision blurred as he felt a hand worm under his shirt to scratch at his skin, and he was vaguely aware of the fact that he was hyperventilating.

     "I'll make it good for you, baby. Don't fight it," Mori whispered in his ear, lips brushing the skin of his jaw as he moved to kiss him. Kenma was as still as a statue, eyes wide in horror. Unable to do anything against the man molesting him.

     Hands groped his ass, Mori groaning in his ear at the feeling, and Kenma wanted to scream. He wanted to cry and yell and fucking claw this guy's eyes out of his fucking head. But all he could see were his memories of the same thing happening and the consequences that came with fighting. It only made it worse when you couldn't actually fight them off.

      _Please stop,_ he whimpered again in his head, one of Mori's hands moving to palm the front of his pants.  _Please don't make me go through this again._ After everything he'd done to get away from the person who'd started this all. After all of the progress he'd made with Kuroo.

_Kuroo._

     The name shook him from his stupor, giving him strength that he didn't know he had. Kenma shoved against Mori's chest, trying to get space between them, and struggled to get enough air in his lungs for a good scream. Mori chuckled at him, like he thought Kenma's efforts were comical, and simply pressed in closer.

     "Kuroo," Kenma breathed, shutting his eyes tight against the feeling of Mori's tongue on his neck.

     "Sorry, baby, but he can't help you now." Kenma shuddered at the husky voice that vibrated against his throat, but he shook off the fear that those words placed in his chest and took a deeper breath.

     "Kuroo," he shouted this time. "Kuroo, help!" His voice echoed in the night air, his breath visible in front of him. Mori hissed at him to shut up, but Kenma ignored him. "Tetsurou! Help me!" His throat felt raw with the power of his screams.

     Mori pulled away and slapped Kenma across the face, making his head swim and his ears ring. "Shut your mouth, you bitch!" he snarled, eyes flashing angrily. He reared his hand back, like he was going to strike Kenma again, but he didn't get the chance to.

     A fist shot out from the edge of Kenma's shaky vision, something in the back of his mind screaming that it belonged to someone familiar, and connected with the side of Mori's face. The taller man went sprawling on the sidewalk and turned, ready to face his attacker, but stopped when he saw who it was.

      _"What_ _the fuck are you doing to him?"_ Kuroo's voice roared from somewhere next to Kenma, furious not even beginning to describe how he sounded. Now that Mori wasn't holding him up anymore, Kenma slid down the wall he'd been pinned against until he was sitting, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.

     He was vaguely aware of a fight going on near him, angry words and curses flying through the air as much as fists. After what felt like an eternity, but in all reality was probably only about two minutes or so, someone knelt in front of him. Kenma flinched away from a touch at his shoulder, still not really seeing who it was.

     "Kenma." He looked up at the sound of his name, his wide eyes finally focusing on his boyfriend's face.

     "Kuroo," he murmured, "I brought your textbook. You left it at my apartment." Even to himself, his voice sounded hollow. Kuroo reached out to him again hesitantly, his eyes filled with pain and fear.

     "Kenma, are you okay?" His voice was soft and calculated. "Did he hurt you?" Kuroo touched his cheek, and it was like his touch made everything a reality.

     "Kuroo," he whimpered, tears quickly gathering in his eyes. "I...he...." He didn't get to finish before a sob clawed its way out of his mouth. He reached out to Kuroo willingly now, burying his face in his boyfriend's neck.

     "Oh, Kitten," Kuroo choked out and wrapped his arms around him, pressing his lips into Kenma's hair. "I've got you now. You're safe."

     Kenma pretty much crawled into Kuroo's lap, trying to get as close as to him as he could. Kuroo would make everything okay. Kuroo was smart and kind and would never do anything to hurt him.

     Kuroo held him tightly, rocking him gently back and forth like you would a child and murmuring soft things to him. It helped, but only a bit. Everything that happened kept playing over and over again in his head, like it was on a never ending loop. He wanted it to stop, wanted to stop feeling that sicko's hands all over him. He could still feel Mori's lips on his skin.

     Kenma shuddered at that and pulled his head back, immediately searching out Kuroo's lips with his own. He wanted to only feel Kuroo. He felt so dirty and slimy with Mori's phantom touch all over his body.

     "Kenma, wait," Kuroo mumbled against his lips, trying to pull away. Kenma curled his hands into Kuroo's dark hair and held him still, demanding that he not move.

     "I can still feel him," he explained, tears making his words warbled. "I can feel his touch. Make it stop. Make it go away." He was begging at this point, trying to get Kuroo to understand.

     It seemed that Kuroo did, because he leaned down and kissed Kenma senseless. There was nothing sexual about it, though. While it was still filled with passion and wanting, it was more like Kuroo was claiming him. His hands were all over Kenma, gripping his hips with bruising force and running over his back possessively.

     Kuroo kissed him until the knot in his chest loosened and his hands stopped trembling. Once he could breathe properly again, Kenma pulled away, leaning forward to sniffled into Kuroo's neck.

     "Come on," Kuroo whispered, helping him to his feet. He wrapped his arms around himself while Kuroo picked up his textbook, coming back to him to wrap a secure arm around his shoulders. Kuroo guided him back to the university entrance and down the sidewalk, glaring at anyone who stared a bit too long. Kenma closed his eyes as they walked, trusting Kuroo to maneuver him correctly.

     He was so tired....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Kenma! But don't worry! Kuroo's not going to let him handle it alone.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, please leave comments and kudos. They make my day! Stay tuned for more!


	10. We'll Be Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma deals with what happened the night before, and Kuroo comes to understand something during a visit to his mom's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's some feelings to help patch up the pain I caused last chapter. Thanks for reading! Please enjoy!

     Kenma blinked awake to the feeling of someone rocking him. The soft sway made something warm settle in his chest, like when his mother used to card her fingers through his hair and tell him everything was going to be okay. It took him a moment to take in his surroundings.

     He was in an unfamiliar room, but that didn't worry him. Because, when he looked up, he could see Kuroo. The dark haired man had his head leaned back against...it took Kenma a few more seconds to realize they were sitting in a rocking chair, Kenma draped across Kuroo's lap his head resting on Kuroo's shoulder. Kuroo's eyes were closed, but it was obvious from the continuous swaying that he was awake, rocking them soothingly.

     "Good morning," he whispered, voice raspy from the crying he did the night before. Kuroo jumped a little and looked down him with gentle eyes. Now that it wasn't dark, Kenma finally got a good look at his boyfriend. There was a dark bruise on the left side of his jaw and his bottom lip was busted, and dark circles rested under his eyes.

     "Good morning, Kitten," Kuroo cooed to him, adjusting the blanket that Kenma had just noticed was wrapped around them.

     "You're hurt." Kenma lifted a hand and touched the tips of his fingers to Kuroo's bottom lip. The taller man let him trace over first the cut on his lip and then the bruise on his jaw, before taking Kenma's hand in his own and kissing his fingers.

     "I'm okay," Kuroo said quietly, watching him with concerned eyes. "What about you?" Kenma grew silent. "I know you're not okay, but...I need to know if you're hurt. If he did anything to you. You didn't tell me last night."

     Kenma shook his head. "I'm sorry. I don't remember what happened after...you know."

     "You cried a lot." Kuroo's voice was rough when he spoke. "The only things I could get out of you were apologies, and you kept asking me to not leave you." Kenma looked away, tears burning in his eyes.

     "Hey," Kuroo gently took Kenma's chin and turned his head so he had to meet his gaze. "I will never leave you. Do you understand me? I don't care what you do or what is done to you, I will always be here for you. As long as you want me."

     Kenma hiccuped a soft sob and wrapped his hands around Kuroo's, seeing that his knuckles were bruised and bloody, too. "I'll always want you." Kuroo smiled down at him softly, reaching out with his free hand to tuck a lock of blonde hair behind his ear.

     "I need to know, Kenma. Please," he whispered, and Kenma nodded.

     "H-He reached up my shirt and felt up my ass. I can't really remember much of it. A lot of it's a blur," he mumbled, pressing his face into Kuroo's neck. The dark haired man held him close and rubbed a warm hand up and down his back.

     "Your pants were undone. When I got him off you. So, I didn't know...." Kuroo trailed off and Kenma shook his head. He didn't remember Mori getting that far.

     "No, I...he didn't get any further." He curled into Kuroo's chest. "He kissed me. And my neck." Kuroo let out a shaky breath filled with anger and frustration.

     "I should have beat the shit out of him," he growled. "I should have done more than just rough him up and report him to campus police." Kenma shook his head.

     "I don't want to talk about this," he whimpered. "I- Can I take a shower? I feel...dirty."

     "Of course." Kuroo helped him to his feet and led him to the bathroom. Kuroo stood in the doorway awkwardly, fidgeting with his fingers. "Do you want me with you?"

     "Yes, please," Kenma whispered, the thought of being separated from the dark haired man made his chest clench painfully. Kuroo smiled at him softly and nodded, moving to start the shower. Kenma started to fumble with his pants, his fingers not working like he wanted them to. He huffed in annoyance and jumped when Kuroo's fingers touched his hand.

     "Let me," the taller man murmured, and Kenma nodded, moving his hands to Kuroo had more room. Kuroo undressed him carefully, sliding his pants and briefs gently down his thighs and holding Kenma steady as he stepped out of them. He pulled the bottom of Kenma's sweater up next, easing the fabric over his head and placing it in a pile with his pants.

     Kenma watched as Kuroo quickly shed his own clothes, focusing on the way his muscles flexed under his tan skin. Kuroo looked up at him and sucked in a sharp breath. Kenma looked down at himself, curious as to what had made Kuroo react that way, and saw rows of red running down his stomach. Marks left behind by Mori when he'd slid his hands up Kenma's shirt.

     His hands shook as he looked at the scratches, a new wave of disgust washing through him. He whimpered again and wrapped his arms around himself, trying to keep the memories at bay. Another pair of arms wrapped around him and pulled him into a warm chest.

     "I've got you," Kuroo told him, his voice steady and even. "Come on. Let me take care of you." Kenma let himself be led into the shower and directed under the spray of water, humming softly as the hot water cascaded down on him. The sting from the heat felt good on his tense muscles, helping with the deep ache that was throbbing through his whole body.

     Kuroo let him stand under the water for a while, letting it soak into his hair while the taller man waited patiently behind him. After a few moments, he guided Kenma back gently and let him lean against his chest. Kenma heard Kuroo pop open a bottle and sighed when Kuroo's fingers started to massage shampoo into his hair.

     Kenma closed his eyes and let Kuroo do as he pleased, rinsing the shampoo from his hair. Kuroo shifted him further away from the water and lathered a bar of soap between his hands, rubbing the suds into Kenma's skin gently. There was nothing sexual about Kuroo's touch, simply washing Kenma with care and brushing soft kisses over his shoulders every once in a while.

     Once his body was clean, Kuroo rubbed conditioner into Kenma's hair and rinsed his hands off, letting the product sit in his hair for a bit. Kenma sighed again when Kuroo wrapped his arms around him and started rocking them back and forth slowly, humming a song quietly under his breath.

     "I have work," Kenma gasped suddenly. "And I need to feed Frank." He started to move, trying to get out of the shower, but Kuroo stopped him.

     "I already called Akaashi. He said to take all the time off from work that you need and that he'd take care of Frank," the dark haired man explained slowly, easing Kenma back against his chest. It was silent for a moment, Kenma waiting for his racing heart to calm again.

     "Why do you have a rocking chair in your apartment?" he asked quietly, opening his eyes to glance up at his boyfriend. Kuroo smiled down at him with a thoughtful look and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

     "It was Mom's. She used to rock me in it all the time when I was little." Kuroo chuckled softly. "I was such a crybaby when I was a kid. I'd scrape my knees or cut myself doing something stupid and go running to her, bawling my eyes out. Every time I did, she would give me a bandaid, kiss my boo-boo, and go rock me in that chair until I calmed down."

     "How is your mother? I haven't gotten to visit her in a while," Kenma mused, turning in Kuroo's hold so he could rinse the conditioner out of his hair. While Kenma took care of his hair, Kuroo started to wash himself.

     "She's been doing well. I was supposed to go visit her today, actually. But I'll give her a call and tell her I can't make it."

     Kenma frowned at him. "Why can't you make it?" Kuroo looked at him for a moment, pausing as he lathered shampoo in his hair.

     "Well, I thought you'd want me to stay with you?" Kenma moved out from under the water so that Kuroo would rinse his hair and folded his arms in front of his chest.

     "I'd like to stay with you, but we can go visit your mother. If you don't mind me tagging along again?" Kuroo grinned down at him.

     "Are you kidding? Mom loves you. Of course you can come." Kuroo hesitated. "As long as you're up to it, that is. I don't want you to push yourself."

     Kenma shook his head, finding Kuroo's concern more than a little endearing. "It'll be good for me. Besides, I like talking to your mother."

     Kuroo's smile widened and he quickly started to wash his body. "We better hurry then, huh?"

\\\

     After their shower, they had quickly gotten ready, Kuroo letting Kenma borrow one of his hoodie (which Kenma was determined to keep because it was comfy and smelled so good), and made their way to Kuroo's mother's house. After the times Kenma had gone with Kuroo to visit his mother, he'd started to notice a pattern to Kuroo's emotions along the journey.

     On their way to the train station, Kuroo would hurry, using the full length of his long legs and making Kenma stretch his own to keep up with him. It was understandable. Kuroo was excited to see his mother. Once they reached the station, the dark haired man would babble on and on about his mother, telling story after story about her. Even if Kenma had heard the story before, he let Kuroo tell it anyway, listening just as intently as the first time even if it was the third time. It seemed to put Kuroo as ease, anyway.

     When they reached their stop, though, it was like someone flipped a switch. Kuroo stopped talking as much, leaning into Kenma's soft touches on his arm or leg, and he hesitated just a bit before stepping through the train's doorway. After that, he would take small, slow steps on the walk to his mother's house. Almost as if he didn't want to see her.

     The final stage, the one they were at now, was the worst, in Kenma's opinion. Kuroo stopped at the house's walkway, and Kenma did the same. He glanced up at the dark haired man out of the corner of his eye and studied his face. It was drawn and his skin had paled considerably, his eyes wide with fear and misery. Kenma's heart ached for him.

     "Come on," he murmured, tugging on Kuroo's hand to lead him up to the front door. Kuroo followed him less hesitantly, swallowing thickly when they reached the door. He closed his eyes and swallowed again before taking a breath and knocking softly, looking more or less like his usual self.

     The door opened quietly, revealing a worried Mrs. Nancy, her lips pursed into a concerned frown. "Oh, Tetsurou," she sighed, relief coating her words. "I'm so glad you're here."

     Kenma immediately sensed Kuroo tense. "What's wrong?" The dark haired man's voice was purposefully calm, something Kenma was sure his medical classes had taught him.

     "She's having a bad day," Mrs. Nancy explained, looking over her shoulder back into the house, and Kenma's heart hammered not his chest. "She wouldn't even eat breakfast. I need to go to the store and get some groceries and her prescriptions, but I didn't want to leave her alone."

     Kuroo nodded and squared his shoulders, a determined look settling across his face. "Okay. You go to the store. Kenma and I will take care of her."

     Mrs. Nancy nodded gratefully and stepped back to let them in the house, giving Kenma a small friendly smile. Kuroo hung both of their coats up and took out Mrs. Nancy's, handing it to her once she had her car keys.

     "I'll be back as soon as I can," she told them, pulling on a knitted beanie over her blonde hair as she turned to Kuroo. "She's awake right now. If you can get her to eat something, that would be great. I know that she always does what you say."

     Kuroo's lips twitched into a small smile and he shrugged, and Kenma nodded in the background. He found it hard to say no to Kuroo, too. Mrs. Nancy hugged them both goodbye and was on her way, shutting the front door quietly behind herself.

     "I'm sorry," Kuroo mumbled, running a hand through his hair nervously. "I didn't know how she was feeling today."

     Kenma shook his head. "It's fine, Kuroo. I don't mind helping you take care of your sick mother." He looked up at his boyfriend, trying to show him that he really could help. "What do you need me to do?" Kuroo smiled at him gratefully and sighed again.

     "Let's see how she's doing, first. We can think about what needs to be done after." Kenma nodded and followed Kuroo to his mother's room quietly, pausing behind him as Kuroo gently knocked.

     "Yes?" Kenma held his breath at the soft, croaking voice. Kuroo pushed opened the door stepping inside quietly, and Kenma peeked around him, his breath catching in his throat at what he saw.

     Kuroo's mother was a deathly shade of white, dark circles under her eyes and her cheeks sunken in so that shadows fell over her face. Her chest shook every time it rose and fell, like every breath was a struggle. It made Kenma feel like he was suffocating, himself.

     "Hey, Momma," Kuroo whispered, a small smile on his lips as he crossed the room to his mother.

     The sickly woman sucked in a ragged breath that made Kenma flinch and smiled widely. "Tetsurou, I was worried you wouldn't come today," she rasped, reaching out a shaky hand to her son. Kuroo took it gently and kissed her fingers.

     "Oh, come on. You know I'd never forget about you." Kuroo glanced over his shoulder when Kenma stepped into the room. "I brought Kenma this time. He wanted to see you, too."

     Kayoko glanced around her son, her eyes warming when she saw Kenma, and waved him closer. "Oh, Kenma, I'm so glad you came! Come here, come here."

     Kenma smiled at her enthusiasm, still herself despite not feeling well. He quickly moved to the other side of her bed, taking the hand that Kuroo wasn't holding. She didn't flinch as how cold his hand was, just squeezed his fingers and grinned up at him with the same look Kuroo had given him more times than he could count.

     "I wouldn't miss this for the world," he told her, taking comfort in her motherly presence. "I can't go very long without having one of our conversations, after all." Kayoko wheezed a laugh at him and lighty hit him on the arm with an open palm.

     Kenma snickered with her, looking up to see Kuroo watching him with a fond smile. He blushed and glanced away, picking at the bottom of his 'borrowed' hoodie.

     "So," Kuroo started, clearing his throat to get his mother's attention. "I heard you haven't eaten anything yet today, Mom. If I made you some soup, would you eat that?" Kayoko gave her son a pained look and sighed.

     "I don't know, baby. I'm not feeling very well today," she whispered.

     "It would make Kuroo and I feel better if you at least had something," Kenma murmured gently, surprising both mother and son at his words. They both turned and blinked at him before Kayoko sighed again.

     "And I thought Tetsurou had perfected the Puppy Dog Eyes," she said dramatically, shutting her eyes tightly. "Oh, fine. Just stop looking at me like that, both of you." Kuroo smiled at Kenma and mouth a 'thank you' to him, and he waved him off. Kenma wanted her to eat just as much as Kuroo did.

     "Okay, I'll go make you some soup," Kuroo said as he stood, leaning down to place a gentle kiss on first his mother's forehead and then Kenma's. "Do you need anything else while I'm in the kitchen?"

     Kayoko shook her head and waved Kuroo off. "Go, go! How are we supposed to gossip about you if you don't leave?" Kuroo chuckled and nodded, leaving them to go cook his mother's meal. Once her son was out of earshot, Kayoko turned to Kenma, her mood suddenly serious. "Do you want to tell me what happened to both of your faces? Or do I need to ask my son?"

     Kenma's eyes widened in shock, not prepared for the question, and his face flushed with shame. "U-Um, I didn't think you had noticed," he muttered, looking down at his lap.

     "Kenma, I'm dying, not blind." Kenma flinched at her words, but she ignored him. "What happened?"

     "I-I, um, was...." He didn't know if he wanted to tell her the truth. It might upset her and make her condition worse. "I was...attacked, and Kuroo saved me. Last night. Kuroo left one of his textbooks at my apartment, so I brought it to his campus." He shut his eyes at the flood of memories that came rushing back, trying and failing to keep the panic they brought with them at bay.

     "Someone offered...to help me, but he...and then he...." Kenma couldn't finish his sentence, instead he buried his face in his hands as tears leaked through his lashes. Kayoko was silent for a moment as Kenma cried quietly, and then Kenma felt a hand brush over his hair softly.

     "Oh, honey," Kuroo's mother breathed, her voice laced with pain and understanding despite Kenma trying to keep it from her. "Come here, baby. I've got you." She tugged at the sleeve of Kenma's hoodie until he crawled unto the bed beside her, maneuvering his head until it rested on one of her boney, but steady, shoulders.

     Kenma tried to keep his sobs quiet, not wanting to alert Kuroo to his outburst, and Kayoko simply rubbed his back and combed her fingers through his hair soothingly. Murmuring, "Let it out, sweetheart," into his ear, she rested her head on the top of his and hummed to him softly.

\\\

*Kuroo POV*

     Kuroo found them like that when he came back, soup and a glass of water balanced on a tray in his hands. Kenma had his head tucked under his mom's chin, tears still rolling down his cheeks despite the fact that he was obviously fast asleep. The image sent a stab of pain and sadness through his chest.

     His mom looked up at him, a look of concern making her look older than she was. "This isn't the first time it's happened to him, is it?" she asked, and Kuroo didn't need to ask what she was talking about. He shook his head and sat in the chair by her bed, setting the tray down on her bedside table.

     "No. He had a boyfriend, a couple years ago." Kuroo ran a hand over his face and sighed. "It really messed him up."

     His mom nodded, brushing some of Kenma's blonde hair away from his face. "He's been through a lot." Her eyes scanned over Kenma's face. "Poor thing."

     Kuroo nodded. "He needs rest. He tossed and turned with nightmares for hours last night. Couldn't get him to calm down until I rocked him in the chair." His mom's lips curled into a small, knowing smile.

     "The chair always works," she murmured, and Kuroo nodded, taking a moment to look at Kenma. He looked so at peace when he slept, despite the tears still dripping from his eyes. Kuroo grabbed a tissue from his mom's nightstand and gently dabbed at his boyfriend's face, clearing the tears easily enough. Kenma barely even twitched, sleeping so soundly in the presence of Kuroo's mom.

     Kuroo sat back in his seat, running a hand through his hair tiredly. He bit his bottom lip nervously and glanced up at his mom, seeing her already looking him. "Mom, I...I think I-" Kuroo cut himself off and glanced at Kenma, not sure he could voice the words.

     His mom watched him with wise eyes, her expression gentle and understanding. "You love him."

     "Yeah," Kuroo whispered, eyes soft as he watched Kenma. "I do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Gasp* Awe! So cute! What's gonna happen next?!
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, your comments and kudos make me so happy! Stay tuned for more!


	11. The Calm Before the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut, because these two deserve it. And who doesn't like smut? Also, some more back story for Kuroo! (This is totally a filler chapter. And not very good. I'm so sorry.)
> 
> Thanks for reading! Please enjoy some fluffy lovey-dovey love!

     Kenma had been so embarrassed when he woke up after falling asleep on Kuroo's mother's shoulder. He had apologized repeatedly until Kayoko had gently hit him on the arm again, giving him a firm look.

     "I don't get to be a mom very often anymore," she'd told him, taking his hand. "So stop apologizing for letting me take care of someone rather than the other way around." After that, Kenma stopped apologizing.

\\\

     "Bo, bro, I gotta show you something," Kuroo said urgently, grinning widely as he waved his friend over. Kenma raised an eyebrow in question, but ignored them and turned back to Akaashi.

     "Really, I'm fine to come back to work," Kenma told his boss, looking around him at the bookcases. "I miss it here." An arm wrapped around his neck and a blur of orange hair flashed in his peripheral.

     "Yeah, Akaashi! It's all _boouu!_ here without Kenma. We need him back," Shouyou chirped as he bounced beside him. Kenma smiled down at his friend, glad to be around the little ball of energy.

     "Well," Akaashi sighed, "as long as you're sure-"

     "No way! How is that even possible?!" Bokuto's booming voice cut Akaashi off, and everyone turned to look at him. He was standing next to Kuroo, staring down slack-jawed at Kuroo's phone, the dark haired man snickering and nodding his head.

     "I know, right?" Kuroo glanced up at Kenma, mirth swimming in his eyes. Kenma frowned and quickly made his way to the giggling friends. He swiped Kuroo's phone from his hands, and his eyes widened in horror at what they had been looking at.

     It was a picture of Kenma curled up against Kuroo's mother, sleeping soundly as Kayoko grinned up at the camera. Kenma felt his face heat with a flush as both Akaashi and Shouyou leaned very him to see what all the commotion was about.

     Shouyou gasped, eyes wide and sparkling. "Kenma, you're so cute!" the ginger exclaimed, cooing down at the picture. Akaashi made a noise of agreement, and Kenma frowned.

     "I'm deleting it," he announced, fingers tapping on the phone's screen to do just that.

     "What? No!" Kuroo snatched the phone from Kenma's hands before he could press delete, holding it up well out of Kenma's reach. "This is the only picture I have of you and my mom together." Kenma paused at his words, suddenly feeling guilty about wanting to delete it.

     "Fine," he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. Akaashi chuckled softly behind him and Kenma shook his head.

     "Oh, bro! You should totally let me take you for a ride on my bike! I got a tune up, and she's so smooth now," Bokuto crooned. Kuroo froze, and Kenma immediately noticed. The dark haired man sent a nervous look out the front window of Dog-Eared at the motorcycle parked out front, his mouth set in a firm line.

     "Maybe some other time, Bo," he mumbled, focusing all his attention on his phone. Kenma watched him closely, studied the tense set of his jaw and the defensive hunch in his shoulders. It made Kenma want to hold him close and tell him everything was alright.

     "Kuroo, do you want to head out? I'm done here." Kuroo looked at him gratefully and nodded, giving first Bokuto and then Shouyou a hug goodbye. Kenma waved to everyone as they left, slipping his hand into Kuroo's waiting one as they walked, and Kuroo smiled down at him.

     They were headed towards Kenma's apartment, but when they walked by a park Kenma changed directions, tugging Kuroo along by the hand. The taller man didn't question him, being quiet enough to worry him. Kenma led them through the park for a while, glancing back at Kuroo every once in a while when he stayed silent.

     Eventually, he stopped them by a pond, settling down on the grass with Kuroo. The dark haired man sat behind him so that Kenma was between his legs, wrapping his long arms around his waist. Kenma leaned his head against Kuroo's shoulder and closed his eyes with a sigh, enjoying the weather now that it was starting to warm up a bit.

     They sat in silence for a while, watching the sun sink while Kenma played with Kuroo's fingers and Kuroo pressed soft kisses into Kenma's hair. But Kenma knew as soon as Kuroo sucked in a breath and held it for a moment that he was about to learn something important.

     "I was in an accident," Kuroo murmured into his hair, "when I was ten."

     Kenma opened his eyes and looked at Kuroo, touching one of Kuroo's hands to let him know he was listening. Kuroo took another deep breath before continuing. 

     "I was going for a ride with my dad on his motorcycle. He gave me his helmet because it was just supposed to be a drive down some back-roads." Kuroo paused for a moment, closing his eyes against what Kenma could only imagine were painful memories. "But there was a truck. It took a turn too tightly and got in our lane. My dad tried to swerve out of the way, but it clipped our back tire. We lost traction and rolled." Kuroo stopped, and Kenma turned in his grip to look up at him. The dark haired man opened and closed his mouth a few times, looking like he was choking on his words, and took a shaky breath.

     "Then what happened?" Kenma whispered, lifting a hand to touch Kuroo's cheek. He knew it must hurt Kuroo to talk about this, but he also knew that if Kuroo had started telling him, then he really wanted Kenma to know the whole story. Kuroo leaned into his touch and nodded, pushing on.

     "My dad was thrown from the bike and hit a tree. He died on impact. I was pinned under the motorcycle and broke my femur. I don't remember much because I passed out from the pain, but when I woke up in the hospital the staff told me I had a severe concussion and several stitches. They had to wait for the swelling in my leg to go down before they could do surgery to set the bone."

     "Here," Kenma murmured, reaching out to trace over his pants where the scar was on his right thigh. Kuroo nodded.

     "I was in physical therapy for eight months. My mom took it all in stride, my dad's death, my injuries, the medical expenses. Everything." He shook his head as a few tears trickled down his cheeks. "I don't know how she did it. I was a wreck."

     "She had to. She was taking care of you." Kenma cupped Kuroo's face and wiped his tears away with his thumbs. "You are so strong, Tetsurou. You go to school, you take care of your mother, you take care of  _me_. Even though you don't have to." Kenma shook his head in exasperation.

     "I want to take care of you," Kuroo insisted, taking one of Kenma's hands in his own. "In fact, I love it. I love  _you_."

     Kenma's eyes widened in shock at Kuroo's words, his field of focus narrowing until all he could see was the dark haired man in front of him. Who currently looked like he had just swallowed a fly.

     "What?" he breathed. "What did you just say?" Kuroo let out a shaky breath, his expression melting into what Kenma could only describe as adoring.

     "I love you," Kuroo whispered earnestly, his voice thick with emotion. "I love you so much it feels like I'm going to explode. I can't not say it anymore. I'm sorry if it scares you, and I'm sorry if you feel like this is all moving too fast, but I love you. And I won't apologize for that."

     Kenma threw himself at Kuroo as his response, knocking the taller man to his back and crushing their lips together clumsily. His heart pounded in his chest, rushing adrenaline through his veins as Kuroo kissed him back with just as much passion.

     Kenma pulled away from their kiss, gasping with the emotions that were coursing through him, and stared down at Kuroo. "I love you, too," he told him. "I love you. So much." He needed Kuroo to understand. Kuroo wasn't just a person anymore, he was a home. He was Kenma's first thought in the morning and his last thought at night. Kuroo was...he was....

     "You're my everything." And Kenma meant every word. Kuroo had become such an important part of his life that he honestly couldn't think of having to be without him.

     "Me too," Kuroo said, brushing some hair out of Kenma's face. He pecked him on the lips softly and sat up. "You make me so happy." Kenma couldn't stop his lips from splitting into a wide smile, so he hid his face in Kuroo's chest, curling his fingers into the fabric of his shirt.

     "I love you," he whispered one more time, his lips pressed over Kuroo's heart.

\\\

     They made their way to Kenma's apartment about half an hour after that. Kenma had realized that Frank was probably waiting on his dinner, ready to snub his owner as soon as he got home. He was willing to accept that punishment, though.

     Kuroo held him close their entire walk to Kenma's apartment, foregoing their usual routine of holding hands to wrap an are tightly around Kenma's waist. Kenma was more than happy to let him do as his boyfriend pleased, enjoying the warmth pressed against his side.

     Sure enough, Kenma was right. The moment they entered his apartment, a ball of orange fur came sprinting out of the bedroom babbling up a storm. Frank slipped right past Kenma and threw himself into Kuroo's legs, rubbing and purring like his life depended on it.

     "Frankie," Kuroo cried, bending down to scoop the cat up. "I missed you so much these days that we were apart."

     The cat meowed up at him as if to say, "Do you know how hungry I've been? I could have  _starved_."

     "I know, I know. Momma and I were doing something important, but now we're home. I'll feed you." Kenma rolled his eyes at Kuroo and watched the dark haired man take his cat into the kitchen with a fond smile. It really was amazing how quickly those two had bonded.

     Once Frank's needs were taken care of, they all three sat on the couch to watch a movie, Kenma and Kuroo's dinner in their laps. Frank seemed to have forgiven him now that his belly was full, because he spent the entirety of the show curled up into his side. Kenma couldn't help but smile at the rumbling purr that came from the cat.

     Kenma leaned into Kuroo's side closed his eyes, sighing contentedly. Kuroo pulled him in closer, letting him settle against his chest while they watched. Barely five minutes later, Kenma was dozing against Kuroo, having a hard time keeping his eyes open when he was so relaxed.

     "Hey, you awake still?" Kenma heard Kuroo whisper to him, lips brushing his ear. He made a soft sound of recognition and turned his face upwards, toward the sound of his voice, but kept his eyes closed.

     He cracked them open when he felt lips touch his, returning Kuroo's kiss immediately. A sudden wave of arousal washed through him as Kuroo gently closed his teeth around Kenma's bottom lip and sucked, a low moan escaping him. Kuroo took the opportunity to slip his tongue into Kenma's mouth and deepen the kiss, pulling Kenma closer.

     He went eagerly, turning so he could wrap his arms around Kuroo's neck, sliding a hand into the shorter hairs at the back of his head and pulling gently. Kuroo groaned into his mouth and wrapped a hand around under one of Kenma's thighs, easily tugging him into his lap.

     Kenma gasped when he shifted in Kuroo's lap and felt how hard the dark haired man was, pulling away from the kiss to look down at him with heavy eyes. "Excited?" he teased goodnaturedly, but Kuroo only stared up at him with half-lidded eyes, his cheeks tinted pink.

     "I want to make love to you," he murmured, and Kenma's heart fluttered in his chest, all sense of playfulness gone. "I want to show you how much I love you. Not just say it." Kenma let out a shaky breath.

     "Show me," he whispered softly, and Kuroo nodded, leaning forward to kiss and nip at Kenma's neck.

*Kuroo's POV*

     Kenma was beautiful like this. Well, actually, Kenma was beautiful all the time. But right now, straddling Kuroo's lap with his throat bared to Kuroo's teeth and lips, Kuroo couldn't help but think he was just  _so beautiful_.

     He told him as much, mouthed the words into his throat, and he felt Kenma's skin heat with a flush, warming his lips. Kenma usually brushed his compliments off, not really believing them, but Kuroo meant every word. And he was going to make sure Kenma understood that tonight.

     "I love you." Kenma shivered against him at his words, letting out a soft moan that made Kuroo's heart stutter. He kissed down the pale expanse of skin in front of him, gripping Kenma's waist and holding him steady while he rolled his hips up into him.

     "Ah, Kuroo," Kenma gasped, his small hands clutching at Kuroo's shoulders, and Kuroo repeated the action. The blonde moaned for him, his golden eyes pinning Kuroo where he was, and rocked down as he thrust up, creating more friction.

     Kuroo couldn't take anymore grinding like teenagers on Kenma's couch. While the idea of watching Kenma cum in his pants without being touch was certainly arousing, Kuroo wanted to have all of him. He wanted to show Kenma just how precious he was to him. So, he shift until there was enough room to slide Kenma's legs around his waist and stood, lifting his boyfriend easily and holding him close.

     Frank meowed up at them angrily, upset that they had disturbed his sleeping place. "Sorry, Frankie." Kuroo threw the apology over his shoulder as he made his way to Kenma's bedroom, the blonde's mouth was too busy trailing light kisses along his neck to utter any kind of response to his pet.

     He laid Kenma down softly on the bed once they reached it, immediately following him and sliding his hands up under his sweater to feel his soft skin. Kenma arched under his touch, barking out a short cry of pleasure when his fingers brushed over a perky nipple. Kuroo closed his eyes tightly against the stab of arousal the noise sent through him, making his dick throb in his pants. He had to be gentle. He wanted to make love to Kenma, not fuck him.

     He eased the sweater over Kenma's head, enjoying how much the action ruffled his blonde hair, and pulled his hoodie off, too. Kenma was staring at him when he looked up from throwing the fabric to a corner, eyes glued to his stomach. Well, to his abs, to be more specific. He couldn't stop a smile from worming its way onto his lips as Kenma glanced up at him and flushed when he was caught staring.

     "You can touch me," he whispered and inched forward, moving between Kenma's legs to take one of his hands. He pressed the blonde's fingers to his stomach, the contrast between their skin tones making Kuroo admire Kenma's skin even more. Kenma sucked in a breath and slid his hand around to Kuroo's hip, rubbing his thumb along the edge of the sharp 'v' his muscles made.

     Kuroo let Kenma admire him as he continued undressing him, making sure to brush his fingers against the spots that made the blonde shiver. "You look so gorgeous like this," he murmured, watching Kenma blushed at his words. He traced at finger over his collarbones, where the rush of blood was prominent, up his throat, to his lips.

     He ran his thumb along Kenma's bottom lip and bent down to press a chaste kiss there, keeping his eyes open to watch Kenma's flutter closed. As their lips moved together, he slid a hand down Kenma's body until his palm rested over his cock.

     Kenma gasped and rocked his hips up against his hand, whimpering when Kuroo ground the heel of his palm down. "Ah! Oh, Tetsu- ah, Tetsurou!"

     "That's it," he breathed, watching Kenma's face twitch as he fondled his dick through his underwear. "I wanna hear it. Tell me what you want."

     "Off," Kenma panted. "Clothes. Off." Kuroo was more than happy to oblige with that request. "Yours first."

     Kuroo froze with his fingertips under the edge of Kenma's briefs and glanced up. He grinned and backed off the bed, Kenma watching him closely. He slowly undid his jeans, letting them pool around his ankles with his boxers before he stepped out of them.

     He crawled back over Kenma, noticing the wet patch that had formed in his briefs, and mouthed at his neck. "What now?" He trailed a hand down to palm at Kenma's cock again, listening to the stuttered moan that left Kenma's pretty pink lips.

     "Off," the blonde repeated. "Please, Tetsurou." Kuroo nodded and slipped Kenma's underwear off. He reached over to Kenma's nightstand and pulled out the lube and a condom.

     "Is this still okay?" he asked, a slick fingertip touching Kenma's twitching entrance. He wanted to be sure that Kenma wanted this; he refused to force the blonde into anything he didn't feel comfortable with. Kenma nodded and spread his legs, sending a while rush of heat through Kuroo.

     "Show me, Tetsurou," Kenma whispered, and Kuroo wasn't about to deny his boyfriend anything, let alone that.

     He trailed open-mouthed kisses along a pale collarbone as he eased a finger into the small body beneath him, taking his time so that he didn't hurt Kenma. He groaned at the feeling of Kenma squeezing around his finger, imagining how it would feel to be buried in that heat. The thought made his dick twitch, and he eased another finger in, immediately searching out that little bundle of nerves.

     After a few searching thrusts, Kenma cried out, throwing his head back and clutching at the pillows underneath him. "There! There...please, Tetsu...again." And how could Kuroo say no when he was asked so nicely?

     "Anything for you, Kitten," he replied and curled his fingers again, slipping another finger into the tight entrance as Kenma writhed. Once Kenma started to thrust back against his hand, he pulled back. He brushed a soothing hand down the blonde's side when he whined up at him, hushing him as he reached for the condom.

     "I love when you do that." He looked up at the small voice, seeing Kenma watching him as he ripped the condom open with his teeth. He grinned, slipping the condom on and slicking himself with lube.

     "That's why I do it," he said, lining himself up with Kenma's entrance. "Let me know if I need to stop." Kenma nodded up at him, and he started to inch himself forward, groaning at the tight squeeze.

     Kenma panted under him, his eyelids fluttering as he whimpered. He didn't stop him, though, so Kuroo continued pushing forward, gasping for breath when he bottomed out. He waited for a moment, trying to ignore the sucking feeling around him to let Kenma relax.

     "O-okay," Kenma stuttered out, already starting to move his hips against Kuroo's. "You can move." And Kuroo did just that, pulling back a few inches and thrusting forward. They both groaned at the feeling, and Kuroo leaned forward to kiss Kenma, needing something to ground him.

     "I love you," he murmured against the blonde's lips, keeping his thrust slow but powerful. "I love the way you scrunch your nose when you play video games. I love how grumpy you are in the morning, and how sweet you are at night." Kenma moaned at his words and squeezed tight around him, reaching up to drag his nails down Kuroo's shoulders when he ground against his prostate.

     "Ah, God! I love it when you do that," he growled, thrusting a little harder now. "Love when you mark me up, let everyone know I'm yours." He sucked a mark onto Kenma's neck too, feeling a possessive streak flare through him.

     "Tetsurou," Kenma gasped, his hands now clawing at Kuroo's back, "gonna cum." Kuroo nodded and slipped a hand between them, wrapping his fingers around Kenma leaking cock. It only took a few jerks of his hand and another well placed thrust to push Kenma over the edge, his thin body arching up into Kuroo's as he screamed his release.

     Kuroo's hips jerked as Kenma fluttered around him, thrusting a few more times before stilling deep inside the trembling body beneath him. He breathed Kenma's name, his arms shaking as he tried to keep himself up. Kenma tugged him down anyway so that he settled on top of him, and even though he was sure he was crushing Kenma, the blonde didn't complain. He simply ran his fingers through Kuroo's thoroughly mused hair while they caught their breath.

     "I love the face you make when you're trying to get your coffee just right, tasting it over and over again as you add creamer and sugar. I love that you're willing to make sure that I'm okay with something before you do it." Kenma paused, and Kuroo looked up at him, wanting to hear more. "I love how devoted you are."

     Kuroo smiled up at him, genuine happiness and love coursing through his veins, and rolled over so he could pull Kenma to his chest. "I'd do anything for you," he told him, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

     Kenma nodded and closed his eyes, and Kuroo's smile only grew when he heard the blonde whisper, "Me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you all know, good things can never stay that way. At least, not in my stories. What could possibly go wrong after something so stuffed to the brim with love and happiness??
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! As always, please leave comments and kudos. I love each and every one of them! Stay tuned for more!


	12. Surprises Aren't Always Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neither of them were ready for this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry that I haven't written in pretty much a week! My school work is starting to build up, and I known that's not much of an excuse but it's true!
> 
> Please enjoy this kinda angsty chapter that I wrote with love for all of you!

     A few days later, Kenma woke up to the feeling of Frank pawing at his nose. The cat was eager for his breakfast. Kenma batted a hand back at him, wanting to sleep just a little longer, but a quick look at his alarm clock crushed that hope. He had to be at work in less than an hour.

     He spat a curse and jumped out of bed, struggling to get his legs free from the sheets. After rushing through a shower and brushing his teeth, he threw on some clothes, towel dried his hair, and ran to the kitchen. Frank followed after him happily, not at all caring about his owner's dilemma. Kenma quickly filled the cat's food bowl and tossed his towel on the kitchen counter. He'd take care of it when he got home.

     He hurried to his front door, grabbing his keys and wallet and throwing his coat on, and shouted a farewell over his shoulder to Frank as he slipped out of his apartment. He speed-walked to Dog-Eared, patting his pocket where his inhaler was, just in case. He hadn't had an attack in quiet a while thanks to the warming weather. Well, that and his extremely attentive boyfriend. Kuroo was very adamant about keeping Kenma's asthma under control.

     Still, Kenma didn't hesitate to use his inhaler when he felt his lungs start to struggle for air. Even if it was just a tickle of a feeling. Akaashi gave him a pointed look when he came in with his inhaler already pressed between his lips, but he waved the dark haired man off, the feeling already dissipating.

     "Kenma!" He nearly jumped at the familiar cheerful shout, turning to face his friend.

     "Good morning, Shoyou," he responded with a smile, watching the ginger bound over to him.

     "I'm so happy that you're back! I wouldn't stop talking about it, Kageyama will tell you all about it!" Shouyou grinned, throwing his arms around Kenma in a tight bear hug. Kenma huffed but hugged his friend back, happy to be around the ball of energy after so long.

     "I'll take your word for it," Kenma chuckled and patted Shouyou's back. The ginger pulled away and gave Kenma a serious look.

     "You know that you can talk to me any time, right? About anything," Shouyou murmured, taking Kenma's hands in his own. "I'm here for you."

     Kenma nodded, a fond smile tugging on his lips. "I know, Shouyou. Thank you for being such a good friend," he replied softly, squeezing the fingers wrapped around his own. After a moment, he looked around and spotted a cart full of books. "Those put backs?" he asked in hopes of changing the subject.

     "Yeah, I figured you would want to do them. I know how much you like put backs," Shouyou chirped as he moved to go help a customer at the front desk. Kenma made a noise of appreciation and started with the task, moving to the children's section to begin.

     As he worked, Kenma felt his shoulders relax, the stress of the morning and the days before slowly rolling off him. He sighed and closed his eyes for a second or two, enjoying the moment. The quiet sounds of the Dog-Eared customers going about their business was like music to his ears.

     The quiet was broken when Akaashi suddenly burst out of his office with his cell phone pressed against his ear. "Kenma-kun!" He jumped at the shout from the usually quiet man. "Get your things. Right now."

     Kenma did as he was told, too shaken by how uncharacteristically Akaashi was acting to question him. He hurried to the back room and threw on his coat, his heart racing in his chest. When he came back to the front of the store, Akaashi was talking to Shouyou in a low and purposeful voice and buttoning up his coat.

     "I probably won't be coming back, so once you get all the customers that are currently shopping out, close up the shop." Shouyou nodded once, already moving to check out a customer.

     "What's going on?" Kenma hesitated for a beat. "Is something wrong with Kuroo?" Akaashi took a breath and lifted his phone.

     "That was Bokuto-san. Kuroo-san's mother is in the hospital." Kenma's heart jumped into his throat and his eyes widened in shock.

     "W-what?" he choked out, his voice a soft wheeze. Akaashi's eyes softened in sympathy as he nodded.

     "It's true. I don't know the specifics, but she's currently in surgery." The dark haired man paused for a moment, as if he was weighing whether or not he should go on. "Bokuto-san's worried that Kuroo-san is going into shock. He said he asked for you but hasn't said anything since."

     Kenma let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding and nodded. "Okay." He nodded again and repeated, "Okay." If Kuroo was really as bad off as Bokuto said, then Kenma would need to be strong for him. "Let's go, then." Akaashi nodded and lead him outside to his car, both of them quickly jumping in once he unlocked it.

     The ride to the hospital was tense and consisted of the sound of Kenma's leg bouncing up and down as he counted the seconds that passed. As quickly as Akaashi was driving, it still wasn't fast enough for Kenma. Kuroo needed him, and he needed him  _now._

     Akaashi didn't say anything as he drove, but his presence was calming nonetheless. It helped keep Kenma's racing thoughts under control. What had happened to Kayoko? Had Kuroo been with her when it had happened? Was she going to be okay?

     Kenma was pulled from his thoughts when Akaashi touched his shoulder. "We're here," the dark haired man murmured gently, and Kenma blinked and look out the passenger window. Sure enough, they were sitting in a parking lot overlooking what appeared to be the entrance to a hospital's emergency room.

     Kenma took a breath and opened the car door, quickly stepping out and shutting it behind him. He barely waited for Akaashi to lock the car before he jogged to the hospital's doors, needing to find Kuroo. Once they entered the hospital, they were greeted with the sight of a familiar grey and white haired man standing by a coffee machine.

     "Bokuto-san," Akaashi called softly, and Bokuto's head snapped up at his voice.

     "Akaashi," he sighed, his shoulders slumping forward in relief. Kenma barely took any notice of them, rushing up to Bokuto.

     "Where is he?" he asked, barely even pausing his stride long enough for Bokuto to point down a hallway.

     "He's in the Waiting Room. Third turn on your left." Kenma nodded, even though he was sure Bokuto wasn't paying attention to him anymore, and ran down the tiled floor, counting the turns to his left as he passed them. One or two of the hospital staff told him to stop running, but he ignored them, too focused on finding Kuroo to be bothered by them.

     Once he reached the third turn in the hallway, he rushed into the Waiting Room and scanned the area. A hunched figure sitting in a chair at the far wall was the only one in the room besides Kenma. Even though the man's face was buried in his hands, Kenma knew it was Kuroo. He would recognize him anywhere.

     "Kuroo," he murmured softly, not wanting to startle the dark haired man. Kuroo's head whipped up to look at him, his eyes dark and haunted.

     "Kenma," he gasped and shot out of his chair, and Kenma opened his arms to him. He let Kuroo collapse against him, moving a hand to the back of Kuroo's head to guide his face into the crook of his neck. Kuroo crushed him to his chest, clutching at Kenma like he was the only thing grounding him to reality.

     "I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner," he whispered into Kuroo's hair, holding the shaking form of his boyfriend tightly. Kuroo shook his head.

     "I'm just glad you're here now," he said, his voice wobbly. "I'm sorry I didn't call you. I was...taking everything in."

     This time Kenma shook his head, carding his fingers through Kuroo's hair. "You don't need to apologize," he told him. "Come on. Let's sit down." Kenma guided them to the only couch in the room so that they'd be more comfortable.

     Kuroo leaned into his side heavily, resting his head on his shoulder, and Kenma let him. It was quiet for a while before Kuroo spoke up, his voice still strained. "She passed out because her oxygen level was too low. Her lungs are finally giving up." Kenma slipped his hand into Kuroo's and squeezed.

     "Were you with her when it happened?" Kuroo shook his head with a sniff.

     "No, I was with Bo. We were out shopping." The dark haired man let out a broken sob and turned his face into Kenma's neck again. "I'm such a terrible son. I should have been there with her. She must have been so scared."

     Kenma frowned and pulled back far enough to look Kuroo in the eye. "I don't want to hear you say that again," he hissed through his teeth, and Kuroo's eyes widened at the harshness of his voice. "I know that's not true, and your mother would be so angry with you if she heard you say something like that about yourself."

     Kuroo sniffled but nodded, laying his head on Kenma's shoulder again. "I just...I'm so scared," he whispered, clutching at Kenma's hand. "I don't know what's going on. Nobody will tell me anything." Anger flared in Kenma's chest at the hospital staff. He understood that it was difficult to to be absolutely sure of what was going on with Kayoko, but they shouldn't just leave someone in the dark like that.

     "Let me go talk to them. Maybe I can get some information," he said, starting to stand, but Kuroo clutched at his hand and shook his head.

     "Don't leave me. Please." Tears rolled down the dark haired man's cheeks as he spoke. "I want you with me. I need you."

     "Okay," Kenma murmured, settling back down beside Kuroo. "Okay. I'm not going anywhere." The taller man buried his face into Kenma's hair, sniffling and shaking as he held him tightly. Kenma let him cry; let him get it all out. The words that Kuroo so often whispered to him coming to mind. "I've got you."

\\\

     Hours later, Kenma sat on the same couch with Kuroo, the taller man leaning against his chest as he slept. After Kuroo had cried himself out, he'd practically passed out, exhausted from the fear and pain coursing through him. Akaashi and Bokuto had joined them soon after, settling themselves down in chairs not far from them.

     "What happened?" Kenma asked, keeping his voice low so as not to wake Kuroo. Bokuto shook his head and glanced at Kuroo with a pained look.

     "We were out shopping. Kuroo wanted to get you something, and I thought I'd tag along and get something for Akaashi." The quiet man reached over and touched Bokuto's hand. "Kuroo got a phone call, and...." Bokuto's expression darkened, his eyes sad. "I've never seen him that scared before. He took off running. Nearly got hit by a car."

     It was silent for a while, before Akaashi spoke up. "Then what happened?" Bokuto took a breath before continuing.

     "When we got here, Kuroo's mom was just getting in. We saw her wheeled in, just briefly. I think Kuroo thought he was dreaming. He just kept blinking and shaking his head. One of the nurses came and talked to him. I didn't understand a lot of it, but Kuroo did. That's when he asked for you." The grey and white haired man shook his head again, sighing as he squeezed Akaashi's hand.

     Kenma looked down at Kuroo and felt his heart clenched painfully at the stress still etched on his boyfriend's face even while he was asleep. He carded his fingers through his dark hair and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

     "He doesn't deserve this," he mumbled. "Neither of them do. Kuroo and his mother are good people."

     "Sometimes bad things happen to good people," Akaashi whispered, and Kenma shook his head.

     "It's not fair." Akaashi and Bokuto both agreed with him.

     Nearly forty-five minutes later, a man in a white lab coat came into the Waiting Room. He glanced down at the clipboard he was holding and flipped through the papers there. Once he was done looking over whatever was written there, he cleared his throat and looked up.

     "Kuroo Kayoko?" Kenma shook Kuroo's shoulder gently to wake him.

     "We're here for her," he responded while Kuroo blinked awake and sat up quickly. The dark haired man glanced around until his eyes fell on the doctor, and he stood abruptly, closing the distance between them in two long strides. All three of them followed after him.

     "What's wrong? What happened to my mom?" Kuroo asked, his hands trembling like when Kenma had his asthma attack. The doctor looked around at them all with wide eyes for a moment, before clearing his throat again.

     "Your mother's lung cancer has progressed much more rapidly than expected." The rest of the explanation was filled with medical terms and went way over Kenma's head.

     "So, what does that mean?" Bokuto blurted out, his brow furrowing in confusion.

     "Her lungs aren't functioning well enough to get enough oxygen to her brain," Kuroo explained softly, his voice hollow. He stared at his feet for a second before looking up at the doctor again, his eyes determined. "So, what do we do? Up the oxygen that gets fed to her?"

     Kenma blinked up at Kuroo and sighed softly in relief, glad to have the dark haired man back to his usual self. He could see the gears in Kuroo's head turning, probably putting all his medical knowledge to good use. The doctor's eyebrows arched in surprise, undoubtedly not expecting any of them to have any understanding of what he'd said.

     "Yes," he responded, nodding robotically. "That's the idea. We can also start her on another course of chemotherapy once she's stable enough. I'm not sure it would do much, but-" Kuroo shook his head.

     "She doesn't want anymore chemo," he cut the doctor off. "She told me a few days ago." Kenma gaped at Kuroo, trying to process what he'd just heard. There was no way Kayoko, the loving, tough-headed woman he'd come to know, would willingly give up on this fight.

     ' _I'm dying, not blind.'_ Her words echoed in Kenma's mind like a broken record, and he realized something. She was ready. She had accepted the fact that she was dead no matter what and had decided to go out her own way.

     The doctor nodded again. "I see. Well, we can prescribe her more pain medication as well. To help." Kuroo murmured his thanks.

     "When can we see her?" Kenma asked from beside Kuroo, and the doctor frowned down at him.

     "It's family visitation only, for right now," he responded, eyeing Kenma suspiciously. Kenma saw Kuroo scowl at the doctor, looking very much like he was about to argue, but Kenma stopped him with a gentle hand on his forearm.

     "Alright. I understand. But Kuroo can see her now?" He just wanted Kuroo to see his mother and be put at ease. The doctor glanced between he and Kuroo and nodded hesitantly, waiting for a moment before telling Kuroo his mother's room number and leaving.

     Kenma turned to Kuroo, tugging on his sleeve until the taller man focused on him. "You go see your mother. I'll be here when you're done," he told him, giving him a look that cut off any argument he had.

     "Fine," Kuroo sighed, leaning down to press a kiss to Kenma's forehead. "I'll be back soon."

     Bokuto already had his arms open when Kuroo turned to him, ready for a hug. "I'm here for you, bro." Kuroo happily accepted the affectionate gesture, patting Bokuto on the back. Akaashi softly touched Kuroo's bicep with his fingertips.

     "We both are," he murmured in his gentle tone. Kenma watched Kuroo's Adam's Apple bob as he swallowed thickly and nodded, blinking rapidly to keep his tears at bay.

     "You guys can go home, if you want. Kenma and I will leave once I'm done," Kuroo said softly, squeezing Bokuto's shoulder when the grey and white haired man opened his mouth to argue. "Really, Bo. There's not much else I need."

     Bokuto closed his mouth with a grunt. "Fine. But I want you to call me first thing in the morning." Kuroo nodded and crossed a finger over his heart with a forced smile.

     "Of course, Bo." Kuroo's friend pulled him in for another hug before saying goodbye. Akaashi murmured a goodbye as well, telling Kenma that he didn't need to come in to work for the next few days, and Kenma nodded in thanks. He couldn't help but think of how Akaashi's business had suffered the past few days, feeling immensely grateful to have such an understanding boss.

     Kuroo waited until the other two left before he went to see his mother, giving Kenma another kiss on his forehead as he went. Kenma watched him go with sad eyes, wanting to be there for him. But he hadn't wanted to start a fight with the doctor that could've kept Kuroo from seeing his mother. He would never forgive himself if he was the reason the two were kept apart.

     So, he went back to the couch he'd shared with Kuroo and sat down, pulling out his phone to play a mindless game he'd downloaded a few days ago. Before he knew it, his eyelids were drooping low and he was having a hard time sitting up. All of the day's emotions were catching up to him, exhausting him to the point that he nearly dropped his phone.

      _I'll just close my eyes,_ he thought to himself.  _Just for a few minutes._ and before he knew what was happening, he'd fallen asleep.

\\\

     Kenma was shaken awake he didn't know how much later by a gentle hand. When he blinked the sleep from his eyes, Kuroo was smiling down at him softly with red-rimmed eyes. Kenma sat up and rubbed at his eyes, stifling a yawn.

     "Everything okay?" he asked as he tried to stand, stumbling a bit. Kuroo caught him easily enough and steadied him.

     "Yeah. Mom was asleep and probably will be for a while. I thought we could go to your apartment to feed Frank and sleep. If that's okay with you?" Kuroo looked at him in question, and Kenma nodded.

     "Of course. I'm sure Frank will be happy to see you." Kenma took one of Kuroo's hands. "Let's go home."

     Kenma was right. Frank was more than happy to see Kuroo when they arrived at his apartment, rubbing against the taller man's long legs with a purr. Kuroo chuckled and bent to pick the ginger cat up, taking him to the kitchen. Kenma followed him, watching from his spot by the counter as Kuroo filled Frank's food bowl and set the cat down so he could eat.

     Once Frank was fed, Kenma took one of Kuroo's hands and tugged him to the bedroom, ready himself for more sleep. Kuroo went willingly, shoulders already slumping forward with exhaustion. They both stripped down and changed into their sleep clothes, briefs and a long sleeve for Kenma while Kuroo wore his boxers and a T-shirt.

     The minute they settled into the bed, Kuroo seemed to melt into Kenma's soft touches, stroking his fingertips over tanned skin lovingly. "Thank you for coming when I needed you," Kuroo mumbled sleepily, sighing when Kenma slid his fingers in his dark hair.

     Kenma leaned forward and kissed Kuroo's forehead. "Thank you for letting me come. I love you." Kuroo shifted closer to him, eyes already shut tight as he buried his face into Kenma's hair.

     "I love you too." The response was muffled but there all the same, so Kenma closed his eyes and let sleep take him away. If only for just a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Kuroo just can't get a break! And Kenma gets to play the hero for a change!
> 
> Only problem is, now I'm a little stuck. Heh. This was as far as I planned....So, if any of you have some ideas for how this should go, please let me know!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you so much for reading. As always, I love your comments and kudos more than I probably should, so leave 'em if you wanna! Stay tuned for more!


	13. Piecing Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma tries his best to be there for Kuroo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SO SOOOOO SORRY! I've been super busy with classes, and it doesn't help that I've had major writer's block for this! I was serious when I said I needed you guys to give me some ideas haha. I'm sorry this one is so short, too. I'm still struggling with ideas to get this story going.
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy this long overdue update! And again, I'm so sorry!

     Kenma woke the next morning curled into Kuroo's chest, warm and comfortable. He blinked a few times and rubbed at his eyes before he looked up at his boyfriend, only to see him already watching him.

     "Morning," Kuroo whispered softly to him, lifting a hand to brush some hair from Kenma's face. Kenma reached up and did the same, taking a moment to touch the dark circles under Kuroo's eyes.

     "You didn't sleep well." A humorless smile curved the dark haired man's lips, and he shook his head.

     "No." Kenma frowned but nodded in understanding. Of course he couldn't sleep last night. His mother was in the hospital.

     "Okay. Well, why don't you go take a shower, and I'll make some breakfast and take a shower after you. Then we can go see your mother," Kenma offered, knowing that Kuroo was probably beside himself with worry. His boyfriend smiled, genuine this time, and nodded, bending down to press a soft kiss to his forehead.

     "Thanks," Kuroo whispered as he got out of bed. Kenma waved him off and forced himself out of the warmth of his sheets and covers soon after, throwing on a pair of loose sweats. He shuffled out of his bedroom and to his kitchen, Frank trailing after him at the promise of breakfast.

     "What do you think, Frank? Scrambled eggs and some toast?" he asked as he carefully avoided his pet, who was weaving himself between Kenma's legs and purring.

     The ginger cat barely missed a beat and let out a few meows as if to say, "I don't really care what you guys eat as long as I get food."

     Kenma chuckled and shook his head. "Yeah, that's what I thought you'd say." He padded into the kitchen and stood on his tippy-toes to open a cabinet and pull down a can of cat food. Frank started meowing like crazy, brushing up against Kenma's legs to show how pleased he was with the idea of being fed.

     "Yeah, yeah. I know. Your food bowl has been half empty all night. Obviously you almost starved, you poor thing," Kenma muttered as he opened the can and set it down for his cat. Frank flicked his tail at him as he ate, clearly annoyed with him but not willing to give up his food.

     Kenma rolled his eyes and moved to his fridge, pulling out milk, eggs, and shredded cheese and setting everything on the counter. After oiling a pan and putting it on the stove to heat up, he pulled out a large bowl and mixed everything together with a little salt and pepper.

     Not long after he poured the eggs into the pan to cook, Kuroo came into the connected livingroom with his phone pressed to his ear and a towel draped over his shoulders.

     "I know I didn't call you as soon as I woke up, Bo, and I'm sorry. But I needed a shower." Kuroo glanced at him and rolled his eyes with a grin as he paused to listen to what Bokuto had to say to that. "I know I promised you I would, but I wasn't exactly thinking clearly when I woke up. You know how I am in the morning."

     Kuroo sighed and shook his head in exasperation as he glanced at Kenma with a fond smile. Kenma watched his boyfriend closely, studying the dark circles under his eyes and the way he curled his shoulders in like he was expecting something bad to happen. Kenma frowned and gestured for Kuroo to come closer with his finger.

     The dark haired man did as he asked, giving him a curious look, and stopped when he was close enough to touch. He held his hand out for Kuroo's phone and made sure his expression was set with something that resembled innocence, and Kuroo handed it over without even a hint of hesitancy.

     Kenma stirred the eggs as he pressed the phone to his ear, catching the last bit of Bokuto's end of the conversation. "And another thing, if you make a promise then you should keep it no matter wha-"

     "Goodbye, Bokuto," he cut the rambunctious man off, hearing his name squawked from the other end of the line right before he hung up. He silenced the phone with a nod of satisfaction and handed it back to Kuroo, who laughed at his actions.

     "He's gonna be so mad at you. I bet he's complaining to Akaashi right now," he snickered as he took his phone back and slipped it into his pocket. Kenma shrugged and focused on their eggs.

     "He was being dramatic." Kuroo rolled his eyes again and moved to wrap his arms around Kenma's waist loosely.

     "Have you met Bokuto? That's like pointing out that water is wet." Kenma made a noise of agreement and leaned back against Kuroo's broad chest as he stirred the eggs again.

     "I love you," he murmured softly, and he felt Kuroo's muscles relax instantly. The taller man buried his face in Kenma's hair and let out an exhausted sigh.

     "I love you, too." Kuroo's voice was small and honest, and it made Kenma's heart throb with feeling. They stood together in silence for a fee moments, just enjoying each other's company, before Kenma decided that the eggs were done. Kuroo let him go, giving him a gentle squeeze before releasing him, and moved to pull out two plates from one of the cabinets so he could scrape their breakfast off the pan. While the eggs cooled, Kenma stuck two slices of bread into his toaster and waited, glancing over at Kuroo when he moved to pull the butter out of the fridge.

     He was suddenly struck, like a physical blow, by how...domestic the situation was. It hadn't really occurred to him that Kuroo had been to his apartment so often that he knew where everything was. It made him feel a little bad, having only been to Kuroo's apartment once or twice. On the other hand, he had a close relationship with Kuroo's mother, so surely that had to count for something.

     The thought of Kuroo's mother sent a stab of pain through his chest, and he suddenly didn't feel very hungry. Kuroo glanced at him, his expression mirroring Kenma's, and made a noise of sympathy, crossing the kitchen to wrap Kenma up in his arms.

     "She's going to be okay," Kenma whispered in a shaky voice, the statement more of a question than anything else. Kuroo nodded into his hair, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

     "Yeah," the dark haired man replied, "she's too stubborn to die. Especially now that I finally got a boyfriend." Kenma let out a strained laugh and couldn't help but agree. They both jumped when their toast popped up, not expecting the loud noise, and Kuroo let Kenma go with a sigh.

     They ate in silence leaning against the kitchen counter beside one another, taking comfort in each other's presence. Kenma finished first and kissed Kuroo's cheek, hurrying to the bathroom so he could quickly take a shower. Once he was finished, he barely took the time to dry his hair and brushed his teeth before he threw on some clothes and rushed into the livingroom.

     Kuroo was ready when he came in, taking his coat off Kenma's coat hook and pulling it on. Kenma quickly pulled on his own shoes and moved to grab his coat, only to see Kuroo holding out so that he could help him put it on. He smiled up at his boyfriend gratefully, fighting off a blush, and they both told Frank goodbye as they walked out the door.

\\\

     Kenma stood in what he had claimed as his designated area, which consisted of a small square on the tiled hospital floor, while Kuroo spoke to one of the nurses at the front desk. From what he could hear it was all medical talk that flew over his head, so he decided to stay back and let the Med student handle it. Kuroo would explain everything to him in layman's terms later anyway.

     His hands itched to pull out his phone and play some mind-numbing game to distract himself from the anxious air that filled the hospital, but he stopped himself. He needed to focus on Kuroo, not some pointless game. He couldn't help but fidget with his fingers, though. He didn't really like hospitals all that much. After he'd had to spend a night in one when he was little when his grandfather died they'd left a bad taste in his mouth.

     "Well," He jumped at the sound of Kuroo's voice, not expecting it. "She's stable, for now. They said she was in and out of consciousness early this morning, but they've managed to get her lungs working a little better now. We should both be able to stay in her room for a while today. In case she wakes up." Kenma nodded and reached for Kuroo's hand, needing something to ground him to reality.

     Kuroo squeezed his fingers and motioned to the right. "Come on. Let's go see if she's awake." Kenma followed closely behind his boyfriend as they walked, doing his best to let Kuroo know in a non-verbal way that he was here for him.

     They passed room after room occupied by various patients. Most of them were adults and elderly people, but there were a few children and teenagers. Kenma did his best not to stare, but he couldn't help studying the vacant look in the eyes of the ill. The familiar look of apathy towards life sent a cold shiver down his spine.

     He hoped more than anything that Kayoko wouldn't have that same look in her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I'm sorry this chapter is so short and doesn't really have all that much content. Writer's block is a real bitch. Seriously, let me know what you guys think should happen. It would be much appreciated!
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this little blurb. Please let me know what you think! And as always, thanks for reading! Stay tuned for more!


	14. Chapter 14 - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma and Kuroo spend time at the hospital with Kayoko.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was an accident! I didn't mean to post this chapter yet! I was still working on it! I'm sorry!!!
> 
> (Also, surprise! I'm not dead! I'm so sorry it has taken so long for me to update. My friend's mother was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and so I've been helping her with that. And then school started up, so yeah.)

     Everything seemed to stop around them as they walked to Kayoko's room, the noiseless air around them making Kenma's ears ring. His palms itched with the need to hold something, and he had half a mind to reach out and take Kuroo's hand. But after glancing up at his boyfriend and seeing the distracted look in his eyes he thought better of it, taking the bottom of his shirt in his hands instead. He couldn't bother Kuroo with his problems when the dark haired man obviously had his own to deal with.

     They passed by a few more rooms before Kuroo slowed to a stop in front of a door, the numbers along the plaque on the side reading 153 in black. The door to the room was cracked open, so Kuroo smoothly ducked his head in the small opening, knocking lightly on the door.

     "Mom?" Kenma stayed back in the hallway, not wanting to intrude if the mother and son weren't comfortable with him being there. Kuroo received a soft response, muffed by the door, and soon after, a nurse pulled open the door quietly and brushed past them.

     With tense shoulders, Kuroo entered the room, and Kenma followed close behind him, shutting the door softly. He kept his eyes on the floor for the first few seconds he was in the room, counting the blue and white tiles. There was a stain that had turned a white tile brown in the far side of the room, something having spilled that had been impossible to clean up completely. It made Kenma's stomach lurch uncomfortably.

     He finally lifted his eyes and immediately regretted it. Kuroo's mother was laying in the hospital bed, wires and tubes attached to her from what Kenma could only describe as everywhere. Her skin was paler, too, which was something Kenma had thought was impossible. Just looking at her made Kenma's own body ache in sympathy.

     He watched as Kuroo pulled up a chair and sat beside his mother's bed, reaching out to gently place his hand on top of her's. The difference in their skin tones made Kenma's heart sink even lower. He watched them for a few minutes, feeling uncomfortable in the presence of such a personal moment, and he debated making some excuse about going to get a drink just to leave Kuroo with his mother for a few minutes. But Kuroo beat him to it. The taller man reached a hand out to him, glancing at him with a helpless look.

     "Come here, Kitten," he murmured, a tired smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. Kenma immediately took his hand, glad to have something to anchor him, and didn't protest when Kuroo tugged him into his lap. In fact, he relaxed a little when Kuroo wrapped his arms around his thin waist and rested his head on his shoulder.

     Kenma lifted a hand and tangled his fingers in Kuroo's inky locks, relaxing even more when he heard Kuroo groan and felt him bury his face into the back of his neck. Kuroo sighed, his warm, moist breath heating the back of Kenma's neck, and pressed a soft kiss against his skin.

     "She talked about last night." Kenma sat up a little straighter at those words. "My mom," Kuroo clarified. Kenma looked over his shoulder at his boyfriend, his brow burrowing in confusion.

     "I thought you said she was asleep?" Kuroo smiled a little and nodded.

     "She was for most of the time I was with her, but she woke up for just a little bit." Kenma's eyes traveled to Kuroo's mother, watching her breath fog up the oxygen mask over her mouth with every exhale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here's how this chapter is going. Don't worry, though! I'm currently working on the rest of it. You all deserve a much longer chapter than this one! Please be patient! If you have any ideas for where you think the story should go, let me know!


	15. Chapter 14 - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys, here's the second half of chapter 14. It's a little later than I promised (sorry about that), but hey, here it is!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy it.

     "What did she say?" He asked quietly, not really sure he wanted to know.

     "She was kind of out of it, for obvious reasons, but when she finally managed to think through the anesthesia, she asked me how you were," Kuroo chuckled, tightening his arms around Kenma's waist. "She wanted to make sure that I wasn't causing you too much grief."

     Kenma hummed softly, watching the way Kayoko's eyelids flickered as she slept. "What did you tell her?" Kuroo shrugged and pressed a kiss to his hair.

     "I told her I make your life hell with all of my puns and displays of affection."

     Kenma made a noise of agreement. "Your puns are pretty terrible."

     Kuroo laughed softly and nodded. "Can't argue with that."

     Kenma glanced at Kuroo out of the corner of his eye, taking in the dark circles under his eyes. The taller man really needed to sleep. Kenma was about to say as much when a tall woman dressed in black slacks, a dark green blouse, and some black heels stepped into the room. It was obvious from the white lab coat draped over her shoulders that she was a doctor, and from the way that she had so easily walked into Kayoko's room, it was obvious that she was the cancer patient's doctor.

     "Oh," the woman gasped quietly, probably not expecting Kenma and Kuroo to be in the room. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know anyone was here." Kenma quickly scrambled off Kuroo's lap, an embarressed flush burning his cheeks, and Kuroo stood up, too.

     "No worries," Kuroo said, holding out a hand in greeting. "My name is Kuroo Tetsurou. I'm Kayoko's son." The doctor shook his hand with a small smile. "This is Kozume Kenma, my boyfriend." Kuroo gestured with a hand in Kenma's direction. Instead of offering the doctor his hand, Kenma simply nodded at her. He didn't want to shake her hand with palms as sweaty as his currently were. She didn't seem offended, though, nodding back to him with the same friendly smile she gave to Kuroo.

     "It's nice to meet both of you. I'm Dr. Karen Anderson. I'll be the oncologist taking care of your mother." Dr. Anderson moved to take a look at the chart that was hanging at the end of Kayoko's bed. "Do you have any questions for me?"

     Kuroo sighed and scratched at the back of his head, and Kenma turned his attention to the one window in the hospital room. "I'm not really sure where to start."

     Dr. Anderson nodded and put the chart back where it had been. "Alright. Well, why don't you come with me? There's some paperwork to fill out, and I can tell you everything that we know. Then, we can go from there, okay?" Kenma wanted to hug the woman for being so understand and personal about everything. He knew from experience that wasn't always the case.

     "Okay," Kuroo said, turning to Kenma. "You wanna stay here?" Despite the way Kuroo worded the question to sound like it was for Kenma's benefit (even though he knew that Kuroo always kept Kenma's feelings in mind), he knew what the dark haired man was really asking.  _Will you stay here in case my mom wakes up, so she sees a familiar face?_ And Kenma was more than willing to do so.

     "Sure," he murmured, moving to sit in the chair beside Kayoko's bed. Kuroo bent to kiss him on the forehead, whispering his thanks against his skin, and left with Dr. Anderson. Kenma sighed once the door closed with a soft click and finally let himself relax a little.

     Kenma shuddered as he looked around the now silent room, the only sounds coming from the machines hooked up to Kayoko. He may have been more familiar with hospitals than he'd let Kuroo believe. He had often called himself a frequent flyer at the hospital where he used to live. When asked about his many visits, he'd simply brushed it off as being ridiculously clumsy. But after a while, that answer made others look at him with pity in their eyes, instead of sympathy, and watch the way he flinched away from his boyfriend a little more closely.

      ** _Ex_** _-boyfriend_ , Kenma reminded himself. That relationship was long over and done. He was with Kuroo now, and Kuroo would never treat him like that.

     That didn't stop the phantom pain of his once broken arm from flaring up again.

     Kenma stood up suddenly and made his way to the window, needing to look at something other than hospital machinery. While the grey hospital parking lot wasn't much to look at, the fluffy clouds that had settled in the sky helped settle his nerves. Clouds almost always reminded him of Shouyou, and thinking of Shouyou almost always made him smile.

     The little ginger had been one of the first people to talk to him when he moved to his current place of residence, second only to Akaashi. At first, Kenma had been nervous around him, not used to all the energy that was stored in such a small body, but eventually he warmed up to the ball of sunshine.

     Shouyou's boyfriend had been another matter entirely. Kageyama Tobio was not what Kenma had been expecting at all when Shouyou had told him he had a boyfriend. That being said, even though Kageyama often yelled at Shouyou and called him a dumbass, it was obvious to Kenma that he cared for the ginger. And that was enough for Kenma to believe he was decent enough to at least try and get to know.

     In comparison, Kenma's meeting with Akaashi had been boring. Though Kenma had already talked to Akaashi on the phone before to set up a meeting, the first time they talked to each other face-to-face was during Kenma's job interview for Dog Earred. He had just recently moved and was still settling into his apartment, more nervous than usual to be around so many people.

     Akaashi had been kind and soft spoken, but Kenma hadn't missed the way the quiet man's eyes had lingered on the still fading bruises that had littered Kenma's skin. It had embarrassed him to let someone he didn't even know see how vulnerable he was, but Akaashi hadn't said anything other than let Kenma know he was hired.

     After that, it was history. Kenma was the connection between Shouyou and Akaashi that had helped the ginger get his current job, and the other two helped Kenma battle his inner demons. They were the best friends Kenma could ever ask for.

     And then, Kuroo came into his life, and his whole outlook on life changed.

     Kenma had thought that he would never be able to trust another person enough to have a relationship with them, but Kuroo had taken that thought and turned it on its head. Kuroo was gentle and loving and would never do anything to hurt Kenma if he could help it.

     Kenma was determined to do everything he could to make Kuroo happy for as long as the other man would let him.

     A soft noise behind him made Kenma jump and whirl around, thinking that Kuroo was back with Dr. Anderson. Instead, he saw Kayoko looking at him through half-cracked eyes, a tired smile tugging at her lips. Kenma's eyes widened, and he quickly hurried to her side, pulling the chair Kuroo had used closer to the bed so he could sit by her.

     "Hey. Hi. Hi, there," he whispered in a rush. "U-Um, Kur-I mean, Testurou will be back soon. He went to fill out some paperwork." Kayoko shook her head a bit and reached a slightly shaking hand up to her oxygen mask, tugging it off of her face so she could talk.

     "I wanted to talk to _you_ , honey," she told him, her voice soft and weak. Kenma watched the way her chest shook when she took a breath. It made his heart ache and his eyes sting, but he ignored both feelings and nodded, leaning forward to take one of Kayoko's hands.

     "Of course," he whispered, focusing all of his attention on the woman in front of him.

     "Tetsurou is my everything, and I want him to be taken care of." Kenma nodded along as she spoke. "But I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to be here for him."

     Kenma squeezed her hand and took a breath that was more like a sob. "You don't know that," he whispered, more than a little desperately. Kayoko gave him a look that made him duck his head.

     "You and I both know that I'm just about at the end of my rope. I don't want to leave my baby, but I don't think I have much of a choice." Kayoko reached out shakily and touched Kenma's chin, making him look up at her. "I need to know that you'll be there for Tetsurou. I trust you, but more importantly he trusts you. And you both need each other."

     Kenma blinked to try and keep his tears at bay. "I love your son, and I will do everything I can to make him happy. I promise." Kayoko smiled up at him and nodded.

     "I'm happy I got to meet you." Kenma smiled back and rubbed his fingers over the back of her hand lightly.

     "Me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *peeks from behind fingers* please don't hate me? I know no one wants Kayoko to die, but...she might? We'll see how things go.
> 
> As always, thank you all so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed my little tidbit I added here. I should be done with the semester soon, so hopefully I'll be able to write more often. Also, I signed up to coach a volleyball team, so that's exciting!
> 
> Anyway, please leave a kudos or comment, if you feel like it. They make my day every time. I'll try to get to work on the next chapter and will hopefully have it posted soon! Stay tuned for more!


	16. Rough Waters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get worse before they get better. At least, that's how the saying goes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, everyone. Here's another chapter! I know it's kinda short, but I have some plans I'm working on regarding the story, so you can expect more soon enough. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
> 
> This is my finals week in college, so after this I'll have more time to write. Also, the volleyball team I'm coaching has their first tournament this weekend, so wish us luck!

     Kayoko was asleep again by the time Kuroo came back, and Kenma had calmed himself down. He didn't want to worry Kuroo more than he already was. He knew the situation hadn't gotten any better when Kuroo walked in with red rimmed eyes. Kenma didn't bother asking him if everything was alright. He already knew the answer.

     "She woke up for a few minutes," he murmured as Kuroo came to a stop beside his mother's bedside. "She wasn't in any pain." Kuroo nodded but didn't look up, picking at the blanket in front of him.

     "Dr. Anderson said that we need to be realistic about the time frame that we're dealing with." His voice shook. "That there is a good possibility that she won't see next year." Kenma's heart clenched in his chest.

     "They don't know for sure," he murmured gently, careful around Kuroo when he was this emotionally unstable. He didn't want to say the wrong thing and make things worse. Kuroo shook his head and reached out and brushed his fingers over his mother's hand.

     A tear trickled out of one of Kuroo's eyes and dripped off the tip of his nose. "I don't want her to die," he choked out softly with a sniffle. Kenma stood up and moved to his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around the taller man's slim waist. He didn't know what to say. I mean, what  _do_ you say in that situation? Nevertheless, he settled for a murmured apology.

     They both stood there for a few minutes, Kenma rubbing Kuroo's back soothingly while Kuroo softly sniffled into his two-toned hair, until there was a soft knock on the door. Kuroo lifted his head to wipe at his eyes and cleared his throat.

     "Come in," he called softly as he took a step away from Kenma, squeezing his hand before he let go. The door to the hospital room opened, slow and quiet, and a familiar head of dark hair poked through.

     "Is this a bad time?" Akaashi asked softly, keeping the door pulled tight against his body, undoubtedly keeping a very enthusiastic Bokuto out of the room. Kuroo looked back at his sleeping mother for a moment, probably debating whether or not to let Bokuto in and risk waking her. "Bokuto-san has promised to behave himself."

     Kuroo chuckled and nodded. "Let him in, Akaashi. A promise from Bokuto is as good as a signed contract." Akaashi nodded and opened the door further, making room to let the grey and white haired man into the room.

     Bokuto was immediately on Kuroo, wrapping him up in his muscled arms so tightly that Kenma's body ached with sympathy pain at just the sight of it. Kuroo returned the embrace with equal enthusiasm, and the two men stood there, hugging, in silence. Akaashi moved further into the room to set a vase of flowers on the table that was pushed against one of the walls. They were daisies, Kenma noticed; common flowers that meant  _Get well soon_.  He'd been given a few of them in his lifetime.

     Before his mind could follow that dark path any further, his train of thought was cut off by a soft squeak from the doorway. He looked up and was surprised to see a mop of shocking orange hair poking its way into the room.

     "Shouyou?" Kenma questioned, not expecting to see his younger co-worker and friend. The smaller man jerked out of sight at his named but was quickly shoved back through the doorway.

     "Come on, dumbass. You're not going to chicken out after Akaashi so graciously drove us here." The familiar voice of Kageyama, Shouyou's boyfriend, floated through the air with a tinge of slight irritation. Shouyou was forced the rest of the way into the hospital room by Kageyama, his eyes dancing around the room like he didn't know what was safe to look at.

     Kenma smiled at his friend when he was stopped in front of him, a nervous look on the ginger's face. "Sorry," the young man murmured. "I'm not good with hospitals." He glanced over at Kayoko and paled when he took in everything that was attached to her. Kenma understood him all too well.

     "That's okay," Kuroo said from where he was standing, still hugging Bokuto. "It means a lot that you came anyway." Kenma nodded.

     "Thank you, Shouyou." The ginger flushed at all of the attention.

     "Is this the Kageyama I've heard so much about?" Kuroo asked, finally separating from Bokuto, who pouted and made grabby hands at his friend. Kuroo reached out towards Kageyama, offering a handshake. "I'm Kuroo Tetsurou. Shrimpy here never shuts up about you, you know that?" Shouyou flushed darker and buried his face in his hands.

     Kageyama shook Kuroo's hand firmly, bowing slightly. "Hinata speaks of you often, as well. It's nice to be able to put a face to the name." Kuroo made a sound of agreement, smiling at the shorter, embarrassed man.

     A soft sigh from Kayoko made everyone freeze, silence ringing throughout the room. After a moment, in which no one even breathed, Akaashi gestured to the door, saying, "Maybe we should take thus somewhere else?" Everyone agreed with him.

\\\

     'Somewhere else' turned out to be the hospital food court. Kuroo didn't want to go too far from his mother and Bokuto was hungry, so it was a good compromise. Bokuto's plate was piled high with both breakfast and lunch foods, scrambled eggs, bacon, and pizza being just a few of the foods stacked on his tray, and across from him Akaashi sat sipping on a soda. Hinata and Kageyama sat beside each other, Hinata chewing on some chips and Kageyama drinking some milk. Kenma had settled for a fruit cup, content to pick at its contents and make it at least  _look_ like he was eating something. Kuroo, on the other hand, had his hands folded and resting on the empty space of the table in front of him.

     Kenma wished the dark haired man had at least gotten something to drink. He needed to keep his blood sugar up. He slid the rest of his fruit cup in front of him, making a point to make a face that said he didn't want the rest of it. Kuroo huffed at him with an endearing smile but started eating anyway, humming in appreciation when the sweet fruit touched his tongue.

     It was Bokuto who spoke first, his voice muffled by all the food in his mouth. "So, how's Mom?" Kuroo froze and set his fork down, and Kenma glared at the exuberant man, angry that he had upset Kuroo enough to make him lose his appetite.

     The dark haired man recovered quickly and shrugged with a sad half-smile. "Not really sure. Dr. Anderson said that the tests hadn't all finished yet," his voice shook a bit before he could stop it, "but it doesn't look good." Kenma touched Kuroo's should, and Akaashi reached across the table to rest one of his hands over Kuroo's folded ones.

     "She's tough," Bokuto said, stabbing at his scrambled eggs. "I know she can kick cancer's ass." Kenma remembered Kayoko's words from earlier when they were alone and decided to not mention them.

     "She's not in pain," Kenma piped up. "That has to be making her feel better." Kuroo nodded beside him.

     "Yeah, one of the nurses said that she even kept some food down this morning." Kuroo's expression lightened a bit at that. "And Kenma said that she woke up for a bit earlier, too." It was Kenma's turn to nod this time.

     "That's good to hear," Akaashi said, and the others round the table nodded.

      "It's not bad news, that's for sure. Right?" Shouyou questioned around a barbeque flavored chip. Kuroo nodded and began eating the fruit cup again, something that Kenma was extremely grateful for.

     "How long has it been since you've been out, Kuroo?" It was Bokuto who asked the question, being uncharacteristically serious. Kenma watched Kuroo duck his head, like he was physically trying to dodge the question.

     "Not that lo-"

     "It's been weeks, hasn't it?" Kuroo's silence was incriminating enough. "That's what I thought. You need to take care of yourself, Kuroo. And that means getting out every once in a while. Come out and have a drink or two with me tonight. Nothing big. Just a chill night out."

     Kuroo didn't say anything at first, just rolled the empty fruit cup around in his hands. It was easy to see that he was fighting with himself; it made Kenma's heart ache to see him struggle with wanting to be with his friend but also not wanting to leave his mother alone.

     "I can stay with your mother, if that will make you feel better," he offered. If it would give Kuroo some peace of mind, Kenma would be more than happy to stay with Kayoko. "Hinata can check on Frank for me, if that's okay?" He looked at his friend and received a nod. "That way someone is always with her, and I can even send you updates if something happens."

     Kuroo glanced back and forth between the two of them, obviously debating with himself, before he sighed and nodded. "Fine." Bokuto smiled and started bouncing in his seat. "But just a chill night out. No parties, no clubs."

     Bokuto held up one hand and placed the other over his heart. "Scout's honor. Just a hang out night. Like old times."

     Kuroo sighed again but didn't argue. After a moment, a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips and he let out a soft chuckle. "Hey, what's a dinosaur's least favorite reindeer?"

     "What?" Hinata pipped up, looking up at Kuroo in amused excitement, and Kenma could have hugged him right then.

     Kuroo's smile widened. "Comet." Everyone at the table jumped when Akaashi snorted, coughing at the pop that was suddenly coming out of his nose. Kenma couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Kuroo so red with laughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hooray! Puns are back! So, how's Kuroo and Bokuto's night out going to go? You'll just have to wait and see! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. It felt nice to have some progress in the storyline. Let me know what you guys think! You know how much I love hearing from you guys.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading, and, as always, I'll see you again next time!


	17. The Road To Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo's night out doesn't go as planned, and Kenma sees Kuroo's vulnerable side again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo....this chapter is a little more angsty than I thought it would be, but oh well! *shrugs* Here's some Kenma taking care of Kuroo again.
> 
> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoy it!

     Akaashi, Bokuto, Hinata, and Kageyama all left after lunch, Bokuto claiming that he needed time to prepare for their 'Bros Night Out'. Kuroo had rolled his eyes but hadn't say anything, content to let Bokuto do whatever it was he believed he needed to do. That was usually the easiest way to handle an excited Bokuto.

     Kayoko had been awake when Kenma and Kuroo had come back, and when her son had regrettably told her that he couldn't be with her that night because he was going out with Bokuto, she'd nearly cried with joy.

     "You're wasting some of the best years of your life fussing over me," she'd said in her raspy voice. Kuroo had opened his mouth to protest, but she'd quickly cut him off. "I just want you to enjoy your life, Tetsurou. I don't want you to have any regrets."

     Kuroo had started to protest again but had let the subject go, just happy that his mother was happy. Kenma couldn't have agreed more.

     Kuroo spent as much time as he could at the hospital, but eventually Kenma had to point out how late it was getting. "You're going to be later than you already are if you wait much longer."

     Kuroo sighed but nodded, standing from the seat that had been his home for the past half day. He walked over and kissed his mother's forehead, careful to not wake her up.

     "Would you tell her that I said I love her, if she wakes up before visiting hours are over?" He asked as he moved to Kenma. Kenma nodded and reached out to grasp at the bottom of his boyfriend's shirt. He wanted to ask for a hug, but he wasn't sure if Kuroo would be okay with that. The dark haired man had been uncharacteristically somber after their lunch with the others.

     Of course, Kuroo could never say no to him. Even if it was to an unspoken question.

     He couldn't contain his smile when Kuroo tugged him up and against his chest, sighing in relief. He always felt better with Kuroo close to him.

     "I love you," he murmured into the fabric of Kuroo's shirt, right over his heart. Kuroo let out a sigh of his own and squeezed him tighter against himself.

     "I love you, too. So much." Kuroo tilted Kenma's head up with a finger under his chin. His cheeks warmed when soft lips pressed against his own, and he sighed when the gentle pressure turned into something more intimate, the rest of his body starting to heat comfortably as their breath mingled between their mouths.

     As if his body had a mind of its own, his teeth closed around Kuroo's bottom lip gently, a tingle rushing through his body at the groan the action drew out of the taller man, and he barely muffled a gasp when Kuroo pulled him tight against his body. He whimpered into the other's mouth as one of Kuroo's hands settled in his hair, his fingers tangling in the two-toned locks and tugging with just the right amount of pressure.

     Kenma panted when Kuroo pulled away, an attractive flush having settled on the dark haired man's cheeks, and Kuroo made a noise of appreciation as his dark eyes roved over Kenma's face. "Maybe I should just cancel with Bo," he murmured lowly, and Kenma shivered at the husky arousal coating Kuroo's words.

     But, despite everything that his body was telling him, Kenma huffed and pushed at Kuroo's chest, gentle but firm. "Go out and have a good time with Bokuto. I'll be at my apartment when you're done."

     Kuroo grinned at him playfully and nodded, his eyes dancing with mischief. "I'll remember that, Kitten." They shared one last kiss, this one much more chaste, and released each other. Kuroo sent one last worried look at his mother before he left, waving goodbye to Kenma on his way out.

     Kenma was immensely less comfortable once Kuroo left the room. The taller man was a welcome distraction from the less-than enjoyable memories Kenma had associated with hospitals. Bloody noses, black eyes, broken bones, a concussion or two; they all flooded back to him in a rush when he was here alone.

     Akaashi had seen it while he and Bokuto were visiting, could see it in the way Kenma stood just a little too close to Kuroo, the way his eyes darted nervously around the room, and the way he jumped at the beeping machines. The quiet man had pulled him aside when they had the time to talk to him.

     "I can stay with you when Kuroo-san leaves, if you'd like," Akaashi had murmured, no judgement in his voice, just simple concern. Kenma had still flushed in embarrassment and shame.

     "No, thank you, Akaashi. I'll be okay," he'd whispered, unable to look his boss and friend in the eye. "It'll only be for an hour or so." Akaashi had given him a look that said he didn't believe him, but he hadn't said anything else as they'd walked back to the group.

     Now, Kenma wished he'd accepted Akaashi's offer. Without anyone else to focus on, Kenma was left alone with his thoughts and memories. And that was the last place Kenma wanted to be while he was here.

     He moved over to the window again, needing to look at something other than the white walls around him. It was dark, now. The streetlights had turned on, and the cars driving on the street in front of the hospital had their headlights on, looking like phantom limbs reaching out into the darkness in front of them.

     Kenma shivered. It looked lonely out there, and more than a little ominous. Maybe he should call a cab when he had to go home. He wasn't exactly comfortable walking home alone after the incident with Mori.

     A sudden noise from the behind him made Kenma jump and whip around, heart beating out of his chest. The person who had come in jumped as well with a gasp, clutching at his chest. They both stared at each other for a few minutes, catching their breath. Kenma took in the other man's appearance with wide, cautious eyes. He was tall, maybe even taller than Kuroo, and broad shouldered. From what Kenma could see of his arms past the short sleeved shirt he was wearing he was fit, his muscles bulging underneath his dark skin. It took Kenma a few minutes to realize that the man currently standing in the doorway was wearing a pair of scrubs.

     It then took Kenma another (ridiculously long) moment to finally realize that the strange man was a nurse. Kenma felt like slapping himself because of how long it took him to actually make that connection.

     The nurse chuckled after a moment, letting out a relieved sigh. "Sorry, man. I didn't think anyone else was in here."

     Kenma let out a breath and shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Dont worry about it." The nurse nodded and moved to Kayoko's bedside, checking the various machines that were hooked up to her. He averted his eyes as the nurse checked her IV, making sure that the needle was still firmly attached to her. He didn't do needles.

     "This one right here is a fighter." Kenma jumped again when the nurse suddenly spoke. He glanced at him before nodding, a sad feeling tugging at his gut. The nurse seemed to notice his change in mood. "Sometimes fighters get tired, though."

     Kenma stiffened and glanced at him again, unsure what to say. "I suppose so," he tried.

     "I mean, you can only fight so many rounds before you feel like your legs are lead and your arms are full of cement." Kenma watched the nurse carefully adjust Kayoko's blanket, tucking it in around her sides so it wouldn't come loose. "Sometimes not fighting is the bravest thing you can do. Even if it's the hardest choice to make."

     Kenma shifted nervously, fidgeting with his fingers. He swallowed, trying to dislodge a growing lump in his throat, and stared at his feet. He had a sudden urge to share what Kayoko had told him with this nurse, but he wasn't sure why. Maybe it was because the nurse was a stranger who would probably forget Kenma as soon as he stepped out of the room. Or maybe it was because the man looked like he had been through a lot in his life and could empathize with what Kenma was fighting with at the moment. Whatever it was, Kenma couldn't keep quiet any longer.

     "What do you do when you want to tell someone something but at the same time you don't because you're afraid it might hurt them?" The nurse paused in his task of refiling the cup on Kayoko's bedside table, turning to blink up at Kenma in surprise. Kenma immediately regretted ever opening his mouth and was about to apologize when the nurse cut him off.

     "That depends. Is this hypothetical situation a matter of life and death?" Kenma glanced at Kayoko's prone form, looking exhausted and sickly, before he looked back at the nurse and nodded hesitantly. "Well, then look at it this way. Would you want to be told, if you were the one who didn't know?"

     That question threw Kenma for a bit of a loop. Would he want to know? Kenma wasn't close to his parents, hadn't been since they found out he was gay. If someone asked him how he felt about them, he usually answered with a noncommittal shrug. But if it were someone important to him, someone like Shouyou, Akaashi, or (God forbid) Kuroo, would he want to know?

     To him, the answer was obvious. If someone had information that concerned how much time he would get to spend with that person, then he would absolutely want to know.

     After a moment of silence, the nurse spoke up. "Did that help any?"

     Kenma nodded. "Yes, thank you."

     The nurse shrugged with a gentle smile. "Happy to help." His smile faltered as he glanced up at the clock above Kayoko's bed. "Ah, sorry, but visiting hours are almost up for people who aren't immediate family."

     "Oh, right. I figured it was about time for me to go home anyway." Kenma pulled his coat on and hesitated at Kayoko's side. "If she wakes up before we're back, will you tell her that her son said he loves her?"

     "Of course," the nurse said, a sad smile tugging at his lips. "I'll take good care of her."

     "Thank you." And with that, Kenma left the room, taking a second to glance one last time at Kayoko. More than anything, he wished he could do more to help the two people who had become like family to him in such a short period of time.

\\\

     Kenma jolted awake to the sound of his phone ringing. Normally he would just silence his phone and ignore the call (especially since when he looked at the clock on his phone it read  **3:20 AM** ), but when he read the name on the Caller I.D. he was quick to answer.

     "Akaashi?" He tried to stiffle a yawn as he lifted a hand to pet Frank, who had decided that he needed attention right then and there.

     "Kenma-kun, I'm sorry for waking you up so early, but I'm afraid I need your help. No one is hurt, but Bokuto-san and Kuroo-san have been drinking more than they planned and things are a little out of hand." Kenma could hear noises over the phone in the background that sounded much like a bar. A sudden loud and unintelligible shout echoed through the phone. "Bokuto-san, please," Akaashi sighed. "I think it's time Kuroo-san went home."

     Kenma let out a sigh of his own and pushed himself out of his warm bed and away from his loving cat. "Alright. I'm on my way. Can you text me the address you guys are at?"

     And that is how Kenma found himself standing in a bar in his pajamas, houseshoes, thick winter coat, and fluffy beanie watching Akaashi try to wrangle a drunk Bokuto, who was attempting to climb onto the bar so he could dance "where everyone could see him".

     Akaashi spotted him as soon as he stepped through the door, his shoulders noticeably relaxing at the sight of him. "Kenma-kun, thank you for coming at such short notice. I thought I'd be able to take care of both of them, but Bokuto-san is much further along than I thought he was."

     Kenma eyed the hand that was wrapped firmly around a handful of the bottom of Bokuto's shirt before nodding and looking around the dimly lit bar. Akaashi motioned around a clingy Bokuto towards a table at the back of the bar.

     "Kuroo-san is sitting at the table in the back. He's...not doing very well." The concern that had been sitting in Kenma stomach ached with renewed vigor. If Akaashi said someone wasn't doing well, then they  _really_ weren't doing well. Kenma nodded hesitantly and headed towards the back of the building.

     There weren't many people there. Actually, Kenma was more than a little surprised that there was a bar that even stayed open as late as 3 in the morning. Kenma would have to ask Akaashi about that some other time. With a direction to go and no crowds to obscure his field of view, it was easy for him to spot the familiar mop of dark hair.

     Which was currently face down on the table in front of the person said hair belonged to.

     The fingers of one of Kuroo's hands were loosely curled around an empty glass, the other hand resting close by his head. Kenma couldn't see his face from the angle he was at, but he could tell that something other than than one too many drinks was wrong. The way that Kuroo held his shoulders, stiff and ridgid, spoke of some sort of tension and turmoil that was eating away at the other man.

     Kenma approached his boyfriend slowly, careful to not startle him in any way. Even though Kenma trusted Kuroo to never hurt him, he couldn't stop the bad memories this type of situation brought up. Once he was by Kuroo's side, he gently touched his shoulder.

     "Kuroo?" He received no response. "Kuroo," he tried again and still got nothing in return. "Tetsurou." The muscles underneath his fingers moved as Kuroo shifted and turned to look up at whoever was calling his name.

     A sliver of a brown eye peered up at Kenma, and after a moment a look of recognition sparked in the glazed expression. "Kenma," Kuroo mumbled, his voice impressively slurred. He sat up slightly and rubbed a large hand over his face, clearing his throat. "What're you doin' h're, Kitten?"

     Kenma couldn't stop the small smile that tugged at his lips at the nickname. "Akaashi called me. Said it was time for you to come home." He glanced at the empty whiskey bottle that lay on its side not far from where Kuroo sat. "I have to agree with him."

     Kuroo let out a gravely groan and shook his head, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. "Don' wanna g'home."

     Kenma frowned and sat down in the chair next to Kuroo. "Well, you can come over to my apartment, if you'd rather?" Kuroo shook his head again, and his shoulders trembled. He muttered something that Kenma didn't catch, distracted by Akaashi dragging Bokuto over to them.

     "What?" Kenma asked, now paying attention to his inebriated boyfriend. Kuroo drew in a shaky breath and sniffed, and Kenma's growing concern skyrocketed.

     "I'm a terrible son," Kuroo whimpered, burying his face further into his hands. "I left my mom alone so I could go drink."

     A loud groan from behind Kenma made him nearly jump out of his skin. "C'moooon! He's not on that again, is he?" He looked back to see Bokuto whining into the crook of Akaashi's neck.

     Akaashi frowned at his boyfriend. "Bokuto-san," he warned, not willing to put up with the ecstatic man's nonsense, but Bokuto didn't let it go.

     "He's been like this since we got here! Akaaaashiiii! Make him have  _fun_!" Bokuto whined loudly, hanging on Akaashi like a toddler wanting to get his way. Kuroo suddenly threw a glare at his friend.

     "I'm sorry that I can't focus on having a good time while my mom is sick," he spat, suddenly very sober, and shoved his chair back so that he could get to his feet and stare down at Bokuto. The other man frowned and released Akaashi with a roll of his eyes.

     "Just because your mom's sick doesn't mean that you can't have a life. You think that's what she wants?" Kenma stood, too, when he saw the muscles in Kuroo's jaw jump as he grit his teeth. Things were getting a little too heated for his tastes.

     "That doesn't mean I should leave her alone. I shouldn't be enjoying myself while she's scared and sick."

     Bokuto snorted and rolled his eyes. "You call this enjoying yourself?" Akaashi tugged at Bokuto's sleeve, trying to get him to stop, but Bokuto ignored him again. "Come on, Kuroo. You can have fun every once in a while. One night alone won't kill her."

     The change in Kuroo once those words left Bokuto's mouth was like a physical feeling in the air around them. Kuroo's eyes widened in horrified shock for a split second, before they hardened with hate and anger. Kenma watched as Kuroo balled his hand into a fist and cocked his arm back. He tried to jump in front of the taller man, to stop him, but he was too late. Kuroo lunged forward, face set in a grim expression, and smashed his fist into Bokuto's nose.

     Blood erupted from Bokuto's face as he fell back, Akaashi struggling to keep his boyfriend upright, and Kenma half expected Kuroo to follow him and keep swinging. He didn't, though, and Kenma was thankful for that. He still stepped forward and pushed against Kuroo's chest, feeling incredibly small in front of his boyfriend. It was then that he realized Kuroo was trembling.

     "What do you know?" His voice was strained as he spoke. "You have no idea what it's like. To have to go through this with someone." Kenma buried his face into Kuroo's chest, trying to show him that he was here for him. "Do you have any idea what it's like to watch the person you care about the most slowly wither away and die? To watch them lose their will to live no matter how hard you try to make them see how much you care about them and want them to live?" Kuroo paused for a moment before he shook his head and sagged against Kenma, letting out a shaky breath. "I wanna go home, now."

     Kenma's chest ached at how small and vulnerable Kuroo sounded. He nodded and glanced back at Akaashi. The quiet man shook his head and waved him on, a look in his eyes telling Kenma they would all talk about this at another time. Kenma nodded and helped lead Kuroo out of the bar, trying to ignore his own wrecked nerves.

     It took some struggling, but Kenma eventually managed to hail a cab and stuff Kuroo into the backseat with him. Kuroo told the cabie his address and was silent afterwards, staring out his window with tense shoulders. Kenma fidgeted with the bottom of his shirt. The last time he'd ever taken care of a drunk person was when he was still with his ex, and things had not gone well for him.

     This was Kuroo, though. And even though he was upset, Kenma trusted him enough to know that he was never hurt him. It didn't ease his nerves, though. Alcohol made people unpredictable, and if there was anything Kenma hated it was unpredictability.

     It wasn't long before they pulled up to Kuroo's apartment building. Kuroo paid the cabie before he got out of the taxi. Kenma wasn't sure if Kuroo wanted him to follow, but when a hand was offered to help him out, he took it.

     Their walk up to Kuroo's apartment was quiet, too, the jingling of Kuroo's keys when they reached his door echoing loudly in the empty hallway. Kenma shut the door quietly behind them and help Kuroo out of his coat, hanging both his and Kuroo's up on the hooks next to the door.

     Finally, he felt that he should say something. "Kuroo," he started, but the taller man shook his head, his back to Kenma.

     "I don't want to talk about it." His voice left no room for discussion, but Kenma wasn't about to keep quiet. Instead, he tried again. Just a gentle push to let him know that it was okay to open up. To get it out.

     "Tetsurou," Kuroo's head ducked at Kenma's voice, and he shook his head again, albeit shakily.

     "I-I don't w-want...to talk a-about it." His voice trembled, and he sniffled wetly. Kenma's heart clenched painfully as he watched Kuroo's shoulders hitch with a silent sob. He suddenly fell to his knees and let out a heartbreaking cry. "It's not fair!"

     "Tetsurou," Kenma crouched beside his boyfriend and rested a hand on his back. Kuroo ignored him, though.

     "It's not fair!" He repeated. "She did nothing to deserve this! Why does she have to go through this pain?!" Kenma shook his head, not knowing what to say. "I don't want her to die! Not my mom!"

     He let Kuroo cry, let him shout and scream and just get all of the pain and hurt out of his system. If Kuroo's neighbors had a problem with it, then Kenma would be more than happy to tell them where they could shove their problem.

     Eventually, Kuroo settled down until he was whimpering and all he could get out were raspy sputters. He slumped against Kenma's side, needing his support to keep him up. Kenma glanced around Kuroo's living room, looking for something to help, when his eyes fell on the rocking chair that sat in the far corner of the room.

     "Come here," he murmured, tugging Kuroo up to stand and maneuvering him over to the chair. Despite how ridiculous he was sure they looked, and how uncomfortable he knew he'd be, Kenma sat in the chair and gently moved Kuroo down into his lap. Kuroo leaned into his chest, curling his much larger body against Kenma so that they both fit somewhat in the small piece of furniture.

     Kenma guided Kuroo's head into the crook of his neck and started rocking them, keeping one hand on the back of Kuroo's head and the other on his waist. The dark haired man sobbed and whimpered against his skin, clutching at him like he was the only thing keeping him grounded in this world.

     "I'm sorry," Kenma whispered, pressing a kiss into Kuroo's hair. "I'm sorry you both have to go through this."

     Another sob tore through Kuroo. "It's not fair," he whimpered. "It's not fair."

     "I know," Kenma murmured, a few tears of his slipping down his cheeks. "I'm sorry."

     They didn't talk after that, just held each other. Kenma rocked them in the chair until Kuroo fell asleep, and then he played with Kuroo's hair until he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALL ABOARD THE PAIN TRAIN! CHOO CHOO! Better buckle up, cuz more stuff is comin' your way!
> 
> Thanks so much for reading! Let me know what you guys think! Kudos and comments give me life!
> 
> (By the way, the team I'm coaching has their first tournament last weekend! We lost most of our games, but it was a great learning experience for them! Wish us luck for the next one!)
> 
> Oh, yeah! And my brother got married!


	18. An Unwelcome, Familiar Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma gets a surprise that he never wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm alive!
> 
> Hey, guys! It's been a while, but I swear I've been working on this. I've just been a little busy with my job and coaching, and school's started now, so yeah. Good news is that I have an idea for at least a chapter or two, which means that I won't have too much writers block with them. Bad news is that I might not have much time to write for a bit. BUT! I'm going to try!
> 
> Anyway, here's a new chapter! Be ready for something I'm sure none of you were expecting. Hope you like it!

     Kenma awoke the next morning with a stiff neck, which he'd expected, and an empty lap, which he hadn't been expecting. There was also a blanket draped over him, which he knew hadn't moved before he fell asleep.

     "Morning." He jumped at the rough voice, looking around to find Kuroo leaning against his kitchen counter watching him.

     "Good morning." Kenma shifted in the rocking chair, taking in Kuroo's appearance. Despite getting at least some sleep the night before, dark circles rested under Kuroo's eyes. His face was pale and drawn, his presence small and guarded from where he stood, leaning against the counter and clutching at his cup of coffee. The knuckles on Kuroo's right hand were swollen and bruised, and Kenma could only imagine what Bokuto's nose looked like.

     "I'm sorry," Kuroo blurted out, breaking the silence that had settled between them. Kenma blinked at him. "About last night. I shouldn't have let myself go like that. I didn't mean to scare you, if I did."

     Kenma stood and laid the blanket over the rocking chair, moving to stand in front of Kuroo. He hesitantly reached out and brushed his fingers against the back of Kuroo's hand. "I was more worried than anything else. I don't like seeing you in pain, emotional or physical." He glanced up at Kuroo to see that the taller man was looking at the floor away from him. "But I'm glad you got it out. You needed to."

     "Heh, I think Bo is going to disagree with you on that," Kuroo chuckled humorlessly. Kenma shook his head.

     "Bokuto will understand. He meant well, but he took things too far." He reached out and gently took Kuroo's hand. "Akaashi will talk to him about it, but I think you both need to talk about it, too." Kuroo nodded and threaded his fingers through Kenma's. 

     They stood in silence for a while, playing with each other's hands, before Kuroo spoke again. "I love you."

     Kenma smiled and squeezed Kuroo's hand. "I love you, too."

\\\

     After showering and eating a quick breakfast of cereal, (Kenma had a glass of milk with his, while Kuroo nearly made Kenma gag by drinking orange juice right after he brushed his teeth) they took a cab to the hospital, prepared to spend the whole day there.

     Kuroo grunted as they stepped through the hospital entrance, shifting the strap of his backpack on his shoulder. At first, he hasn't wanted to bring his school work with him, too worried about focusing on his mother. But Kenma had pointed out that she slept most of the time, and that it would be bad for Kuroo to get too behind in his school work. In the end, Kuroo had reluctantly agreed to bring at least some of his homework with them.

     Kenma followed Kuroo to Kayoko's room, keeping his eyes on the tiled floor in front of him. He didn't want to see all of the other patients. He'd seen enough the first day they had come to visit. Not knowing what to do with his hands, he shoved them in the pocket of his borrowed hoodie, wishing, once again, that he could have brought his handheld. At least then he would have something to distract him from all of the memories buzzing around in his head. He wanted to stay alert so that he could be there for Kuroo. But, despite how hard he tried, he was afraid that spending so much time in a place he associated with pain and fear would trigger a panic attack, and that was the last thing he wanted.

     Kenma jerked to a stop, narrowly avoiding running into Kuroo. He glanced up and blinked in surprise when he saw that they were already at Kayoko's room. The door was opened, welcoming anyone who wanted to visit inside. Kenma looked up at Kuroo, watched as the taller man took a deep breath before he stepped forward, and followed behind him as he entered the room.

     Kuroo rapped gently against the white door frame. "Mom?" he called, sticking his head into the room.

     "Hey, baby," Kayoko's gentle reply made a small smile tug at the corners of Kenma's lips. "Where's Kenma?" His heart lurched painfully in his chest at the question, not used to the feeling of having someone want him with them, and he stepped forward.

     "Good morning, Kayoko," he murmured with a wave. She smiled at him and gave a weak wave in return.

     "Good morning, honey," she murmured with smile. Kuroo moved to the side of her bed and took one of her hands, Kenma following close behind him.

     "How are you feeling? Did you sleep well?" Kenma pulled up two chairs for them to sit in while Kuroo talked. Kayoko gave a small shrug.

     "They've got me on some good medication, so I don't feel much. I slept through the night well enough." Kuroo nodded as he rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand.

     "That's good. I'm glad."

     Kayoko waved the hand Kuroo wasn't holding in the air as if to brush away the topic. "Enough about me. How was your night? Did you have a good time? Tell me everything."

     The tired but excited smile that twitched to her lips made Kenma's heart ache at the idea of telling her exactly how Kuroo's night out went. The thought of explaining to her that her son moped, drank, and got into a fight with his best friend didn't sit very well with him. Thankfully, Kuroo must have thought the same thing.

     "Oh, you know how Bo and I get when we're together. We nearly gave Akaashi a heart attack, like usual." Kayoko's smile widened just a little, and Kuroo sent Kenma an apologetic look. "My only regret is that Akaashi called Kenma and woke him up so he could help me get home."

     Kayoko's smile twisted into a frown as she fixed her son with a disappointed look. "Tetsurou," she admonished, "I thought you knew your limits better than that."

     Kuroo chuckled and scratched at the back of his head, glancing at Kenma with a guilty look. "I know, I know. But it had been a while since Bo and I got together."

     Kayoko huffed, giving her son a still disappointed look. "Still. I know Akaashi is mostly used to your antic, bless him, but Kenma isn't. Don't push him too much."

     Kenma coughed and leaned forward. "Honestly, Kayoko, I don't mind, really. It's nice to see Kuroo out with people he can...relax around."

     Kayoko sighed and patted Kuroo's hand fondly. "You better hold on to that one, Kuroo. He's a keeper."

     Kenma blushed furiously at the compliment, making both mother and son chuckle at him. Kuroo grinned down at him, warm and loving.

     "I plan to," he murmured, to which Kenma huffed and turned his head away.

     It wasn't long after that Kayoko fell asleep. She'd been in the middle of a conversation with Kuroo about how his classes were going when she'd nodded off, her head slowly sinking to rest on her chest. Kuroo watched her fondly for a moment before he sighed and bent to open his backpack. Kenma made a soft noise of surprise.

     "What?" Kuroo asked, pulling one of his textbooks out.

     Kenma shrugged and turned his attention back to his phone. "I just thought I would have to push you a little more before you agreed to do your homework."

     Kuroo huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "I am actually more than a little responsible, you know."

     Kenma smiled and nodded. "Yes. I know." He glanced up at Kuroo, amused at his boyfriend's pouting. "You're just fun to tease." He noticed Kuroo gape at him out of the corner of his eye, but he chose to ignore him, focusing on the game on his phone instead.

     After a few moments, Kuroo turned back to his textbook and began working on his school work. With Kuroo safely distracted, Kenma finally took a moment to think about what happened the night before. Kuroo was obviously hurting much more than he led on if he lashed out at Bokuto as quickly as he had. And despite what Bokuto had said, he and Kuroo needed to make up, and soon. Kuroo needed all the support he could get. But, the day after might not be the best time, especially not if they both had hang overs.

     Kenma glanced at Kuroo again, taking in the bags under his eyes, his pale face, and the way he was holding his head gently while he squinted at his textbook like simply reading caused him pain. Yeah, definitely hung over.

     Kenma reached over to Kuroo's backpack and dug around in one of the smaller pockets on the side until his fingers brushed against what he was looking for. Not a second later, he pulled out a bottle of Advil and dumped three out in his hand, replacing the bottle once he was done with it.

     He stood then and walked over to Kayoko's bedside table where a small jug of water and a few styrofoam cups sat. He poured some water into a cup and turned, wordlessly handing both the cup and the three pills to Kuroo. The dark haired man blinked up at him in surprise before he smiled and took the offered medicine.

     "Thanks, Kitten," he murmured and downed the pills. "You're always taking care of me." Kenma shrugged and returned to his seat, pulling his phone out once more to work on getting the high score in Mochi Mash. It was a relatively easy matching game, but Kenma liked it for the same reason he liked doing put-backs at Dog-Earred. He could get lost in the repetitive motions and choose to either think or not. This time Kenma needed to mull over some things, so he let his thumbs float over his screen on autopilot while his mind wandered.

     Bokuto obviously cared about Kuroo, Kenma could tell from the way the loud man had reacted when Kuroo had agreed to a night out. But it was also obvious that Bokuto had gone about trying to help Kuroo in the wrong way. Some tragedies called for a night of drunken fun, others did not. And while Kuroo liked to have a good time, he didn't seem like the type of person to drink to forget his problems.

     Regardless of Bokuto's poor approach of cheering his friend up, Kuroo still needed him. The exuberant man was an embodiment of light-heartedness that Kuroo needed. Especially now that his mother was hospitalized and had a grim outlook. Kenma had to think of a way to help reconcile the two friends.

     He chewed on his bottom lip at he thought. Maybe he could ask Akaashi. The quiet man had known both Kuroo and Bokuto longer than Kenma had. Perhaps he could help Kenma set something up.

     He followed that train of thought for about thirty second before he sighed softly and shook his head. No, that wouldn't work. At least not today. Akaashi was probably either busy at work or with Bokuto. Kenma didn't want to bother him until he knew he would be able to talk.

     He sighed softly in frustration when he didn't finish the level he was currently working on in the allotted amount of time. He was about to lock his phone and move to the small couch and try to take a nap when his phone vibrated with a text. He frowned and opened the message. It was from Shouyou

 **Shouyou:** Kenma!

     His frown deepened as he answered and waited for a reply.

 **User:** Shouyou.

     Shouyou answered a few seconds later.

 **Shouyou:** Kenma, I need your help! It's about work. Akaashi called in and told me to go ahead and open Dog-Earred, but there's some paperwork I don't know how to handle and he won't answer his phone!

     Kenma huffed. He was more than happy to help Shouyou whenever he needed anything, but paperwork was his least favorite thing to do at Dog-Earred. Still, he didn't hesitate to offer assistance to one of his only friends.

 **User:** Okay, don't worry. Just come to the hospital during lunch and I'll help you with it. We can meet at the hospital food court and eat there while we figure it out.

 **Shouyou:** Thank you Kenma!!!! I owe you one!!

     Kenma rolled his eyes but couldn't keep a small smile from twitching at his lips. He checked the clock on his phone and made a mental note that he had about three hours before he had to meet his red headed friend. That left him plenty of time.

     He glanced over at Kuroo, watching him look over the pages of his textbook as he read and pause every once in a while to mark something in the book or take notes. It had been a while since he'd seen Kuroo study or do any school work. It was something he hasn't realized he'd missed until now.

     While he loved his tall, dark haired boyfriend for more than his looks, Kenma couldn't deny that Kuroo was handsome. Kenma knew that Kuroo knew this, and Kuroo often tried to look his best. While Kenma enjoyed those moments when Kuroo tried his best, he liked moments like these even more.

     Moments when Kuroo was too focused on something to worry about trying to look good. His habit of biting his lip while he read about an interesting or hard to comprehend subject made his lips flush a flattering color. His long, dark eyelashes fluttered over his cheeks as his eyes darted back and forth over the pages while he read. Kenma wanted to trace the tip of his finger over the swell of Kuroo's cheekbones and touch the light, nearly invisible smattering of freckles that crossed over the bridge of his nose.

     The corner of Kuroo's mouth suddenly curled up into a half grin. "See something interesting?"

     Kenma made a soft noise of agreement but didn't offer any further explanation. After a moment of silence, he spoke up. "Shouyou is coming to meet me at the hospital food court during lunch. He needs help with some paperwork."

     Kuroo nodded and put a finger on the book, holding his spot, before he turned to Kenma. "You guys need any help?"

     Kenma shook his head. "No. It's something for Dog-Earred, and I've helped Akaashi with almost everything so far. I should be able to help Shouyou. Thank you for offering, though."

     Kuroo leaned over and and pressed a kiss to Kenma's cheek, which made the shorter man's face flush slightly, but he ignored his body's reaction. "Do you mind if I take a nap? I want to be well rested when Shouyou gets here."

     The taller man shook his head with a gentle smile. "I don't blame you. Short stuff is practically bouncing off the walls ninety-five percent of the time. Go ahead. I'll be here when you wake up."

     Kenma nodded and stood, leaning down for a kiss before he moved to the small couch in the corner of the room. Kuroo happily obliged, reaching up to cup Kenma's cheek and hold him close to draw out the kiss. Kenma let his eyes flutter shut at the gentle brushes of Kuroo's lips against his own. He wanted nothing more than to tangle his fingers in the unruly, inky locks of Kuroo's bed head and deepen the kiss, but Kuroo pulled away too soon, giving Kenma a soft smile.

     "I love you," he murmured, pressing one last chaste kiss Kenma's lips.

     Kenma smiled and squeezed Kuroo's hand. "I love you too."

\\\

    Kenma woke up to someone gently shaking his shoulder and whispering in his ear, "Kitten, it's almost noon."

     He groaned and turned away from the voice, curling into the blanket that he didn't remember having with him when he went to sleep. Someone chuckled above him, and he felt a kiss being pressed into his hair.

     "Come on. The shrimp will be here soon looking for you. You can sleep again once you're done." Kenma turned and squinted up at Kuroo, barely peeking out of his blanket. The dark haired man smiled down at him warmly and reached out to brush some hair out of Kenma's eyes.

     "Have I gotten any texts?" Kenma asked, shuffling out of the blanket. Kuroo reached over and took Kenma's phone off the table next to the couch, handing it to him.

     "I don't think so. I didn't hear anything go off." Kenma rubbed at one of his eyes as he checked his phone and saw that Kuroo was right. He didn't have any notifications of missed messages or calls. It looked like he still had time before Shouyou showed up.

     He groaned as he sat up, stretching out a kink in his back from sleeping on the small couch. Kuroo crouched in front of him and ran his fingers through Kenma's hair to smooth it down. Kenma leaned into the touch and yawned.

     "Did you have a good nap?" Kuroo asked softly, cradling Kenma's face in his palm. Kenma nodded and sighed contentedly, closing his eyes. "Sorry I kept you up last night. And that Akaashi had to wake you up to come get me."

     Kenma opened his eyes again to peer up at Kuroo, only to see that the taller man wouldn't look him in the eye. He frowned at that and touched Kuroo's cheek with the tips of his fingers, making his eyes flick back to his face.

     "I love you, and I want to be here for you. Whether it's the middle of the night or during the day, you can come to me for anything." He held eye contact with Kuroo while he spoke, wanting the other man to know that he meant what he said one hundred percent. It seemed like his message got cross, because Kuroo coughed softly and blinked rapidly as his eyes moistened.

     The taller man nodded as he stood, rubbing at his nose with the back of his hand. "You should probably head down soon. Hinata will be waiting for you." Kenma pursed his lips to keep from smiling at Kuroo's reaction and nodded, moving off the couch to stand. Not five seconds later, the phone in his hand vibrated with a text. It was a message from Shouyou saying that he was at the hospital's entrance.

     "Ah, Shouyou's here," he mumbled, glancing up at Kuroo. "You can come with me, if you want?"

     Kuroo seemed to consider it for a minute, but he took one look at his mother, still lying asleep in her hospital bed, and shook his head. "No, I think I'll sat. In case she wakes up."

     Kenma nodded. "Okay. You need anything while I'm down there?"

     Kuroo shook his head again. "No, I'm okay. Thanks, though, Kitten."

      Kenma shrugged and lifted his phone. "If you need anything, just text me, okay?" Kuroo nodded as he moved back to his mother's bedside.

     "Alright. We'll be here when you get back,"  Kuroo said, taking his mother's hand again.

     And with that, Kenma headed out of Kayoko's room and towards the hospital entrance. He quickly sent a message to Shouyou, telling him that he was on his way and would meet him in the hospital lobby. Then, he pocketed his phone and headed to the elevators.

     It didn't take him long to reach the front of the hospital, but when he rounded the corner and spotted Shouyou's mop of bright hair, he was a little surprised to see Kageyama with him.

     Once Shouyou noticed Kenma, he waved at him enthusiastically. "Hey, Kenma!"

     Kenma quickly hurried to his friend in an attempt to quiet him down. "Hello, Shouyou. I didn't know you would be coming, Kageyama."

     "Ah! I hope that's okay! Tobio doesn't have to work today, and he made me let him give me a ride." The raven haired man blushed violently at both the use of his first name and Shouyou's statement.

     "Dumbass! I did not! Is there a problem with me wanting to drive you places on my day off?"

     Kenma quickly spoke up to cut off any argument that might have been started between the two. "Of course it's alright, Shouyou. I was just surprised." He gestured in the direction of the food court. "Let's go get something to eat and finish that paperwork you were talking about."

     The two younger men quickly agreed and followed after him, arguing between themselves in hushed voices. Kenma had half a mind to tell them to be quiet, but they were being rather quiet so he figured they weren't bothering anyone.

     Really, all he wanted to do help Shouyou with whatever he needed and get back to Kuroo. Shouyou was one of his closest friends, but Kuroo needed his attention and help more than anyone else. Especially if he was fighting with Bokuto. Hopefully Shouyou just needed help with some basic things so Kenma could quickly get back to-

     His train of thought came to a crashing hault as he jerked to a stop. As his eyes had scanned the hospital lobby they were walking through, they locked on to an eerily familiar face. For a split second, Kenma thought his mind was playing tricks on him; that his extended time spent in a place that brought up so many bad memories was making him see things.

     But then the eyes he saw in his nightmares looked up, as if the monster they belonged to could feel Kenma's gaze, and he knew this was no trick.

     He barely felt Shouyou run into him from behind, barely heard his friend's muffled voice asking him what was wrong. His world had narrowed down to the singular point he was staring at in horror.

     Recognition flashed in the monster's eyes, and he stepped forward.

     And Kenma turned and ran.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLOT TWIST!!
> 
> Did you see it coming? Were you completely blind sided by it?
> 
> I hope you guys liked this chapter. I made it a little longer than usual because you all have been so patient with me. Let me know what you thought!
> 
> And as always, thanks so much for reading! Leave a comment or kudos if you want. They make me so happy! See ya next time!


	19. And The Hits Just Keep Coming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo finds out that Kenma didn't tell him everything about his ex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, everybody! Happy Valentine's Day! Here is my gift to you: a new, extra long chapter, with a little surprise at then end. Just for funsies!

     Kenma ran.

     He ran, and he ran, and he ran. He didn't care where he was running to; he just knew that he had to get away from the monster that had followed him from his past.

     He could vaguely hear Shouyou and Kageyama yelling after him, but their voices were muffled through the blood pounding in his ears. His vision had all blacked out except for a small circle in the center. That didn't matter, though. All he had to do was run and eventually he'd get somewhere safe.

     He was barely aware of the fact that he was hyperventilating, sucking too much air in but there wasn't enough air. He couldn't breathe, but he had to keep running. Had to get away. Get away.

      _Get away, get away, get away, get away, get-_

    Suddenly, he was in front of the elevators, fingers smashing the up button. Up stairs. Up stairs was good. But why was up stairs good? Up stairs was away, yes, but it was also good for another reason. What was it, what was it?

      _Kuroo_.

     The name came crashing through his panicked thoughts, providing some sort of clarity. Kuroo was safe. Kuroo would help him, protect him. Kuroo loved him.

     "Kuroo," he gasped out, rushing into the elevator once it opened and mashing the button of his desired floor. He squeezed his eyes shut and covered his ears while he waited for his stop, trembling where he stood. He clutched at the front of his shirt, his chest and throat aching with an on coming asthma attack brought on by the panic attack he was currently having.

     It felt like years went by while he waited to get to the second floor, and the second the elevator doors opened, he bolted through them. He sprinted down the hallway to Kayoko's room on shaky legs, lips tingling and vision going spoty.

     "Tetsuro!" He cried out once the familiar room was in his sight. "Tetsurou, _p_ _lease!_ " Kenma threw himself against Kayoko's door, beating against it even when he heard the doorknob jiggle.

     The door was thrown open, and Kenma fell forward, falling into Kuroo's chest. He grasped at his boyfriend's shirt, using the clothing as leverage to press closer against him. Kuroo jumped in surprise at Kenma's actions, placing his hands on Kenma's shoulder to try and pull him back enough to see his face.

     "Kenma? Kenma, what happened? What's wrong?" Kuroo's voice was starting to take on its own tone of panic as Kenma refused to let there be any space between them, burying his face into Kuroo's chest.

     Once he realized that it was pointless to try and get information out of Kenma when he was like this, and that Kenma was about to have an asthma attack, he pulled the shorter man completely into the room, shut the door, and moved them over to the couch. He sat them down and allowed Kenma to crawl into his lap, whimpering and hyperventilating into Kuroo's tanned neck.

     "Shh," Kuroo hushed him, rubbing a soothing hand up and down his back. "I've got you. You're safe, now."

     Kenma let out a gasping sob at those words, curling further into Kuroo's embrace. His world tilted when Kuroo leaned over slightly, reaching for something on Kayoko's bedside table. A familiar rattling sound came from his left and Kuroo gently turned Kenma with a hand on the back of his head so that his face was no longer pressed against Kuroo's skin.

     At first, he fought against Kuroo, wanting to bury himself further into him so that nothing could see him. But then the familiar feeling of plastic being pushed past his lips made him follow along with what Kuroo was doing. He took a hit from his inhaler, attempting to hold his breath for a few seconds to help the medication take affect. He reached up with a hand and helped Kuroo press down on the inhaler one more time, giving him one more dose of his medication.

     Once he could breathe properly again, he turned and pressed his face back into Kuroo's neck. The hand on his back resumed its motion, rubbing firmly along his back. It was then that he realized he was shaking hard enough to make even Kuroo move.

     A knock on the door made him jump, jerking his shoulders up to his ears as he clung tighter to Kuroo. "Who is it?" Kuroo called and pressed a soft kiss against Kenma's head.

     "Hinata and Kageyama," an urgent voice replied. "Is he in there?" Kenma relaxed at the sound of his friend's voice, but he didn't move his face from where he was trying to meld it to Kuroo's neck.

     "Yes. Come in," Kuroo said, and Kenma faintly heard the door behind him open and shut. There was shuffling behind him, probably the two new occupants of the room trying to find a place to settle. It was quiet for a while before Kuroo spoke again.

     "What happened?" Kenma knew from  the tense harshness of his tone that he wasn't addressing Kenma himself. He still tensed at the topic, though.

     "I don't know," Shouyou whispered. "One second we were headed toward the cafeteria, and the next thing I know, Kenma is sprinting off in the opposite direction."

     "Has he told you anything yet?" It was Kageyama who spoke next, his voice low and soft.

     Kenma felt Kuroo shake his head as he gently patted his back, a calming gesture that helped ease some of Kenma's anxiety. "No. I just got him to use his inhaler." Kenma shifted against Kuroo's chest, and everyone in the room stilled for a moment. But he didn't say anything.

     Kayoko's voice suddenly came out of nowhere, surprising the others in the room. "Give him some time. He'll tell us when he's ready." Kenma wanted to thank her; he wanted to throw his arms around her and hug her until they both ached. But he couldn't find it in himself to pull away from Kuroo.

     The atmosphere in the room relaxed after she spoke, an unspoken tension easing out of the others. Kenma closed his eyes and tried to focus on the steady rise and fall of Kuroo's chest as he breathed, the firm beat of his heart. It helped him calm his own still-racing pulse.

     "How are you feeling, Mrs. Kuroo?" Shouyou asked.

     "Please, honey, call my Kayoko," she replied. "And that goes for tall, dark, and brooding over there, as well."

     A quiet conversation started after that, one that Kenma let wash over him like a gentle wave. Let the voices of the people he trusted blend together into a soft hum. It was like a warm bath for him, soothing his nerves and reassuring him. It also helped that Kuroo hadn't let him go once, still rubbing his back and pressing kisses into his hair every so often.

     Once his heart rate slowed to a much more reasonable pace and his shaking had eased to only trembling, he slowly pulled his face out of Kuroo's neck. "I saw him," he whispered, voice hushed and rough.

     All conversation stopped when he spoke, four pairs of eyes focusing on him at once. He shrunk into Kuroo's chest at the attention and fought the urge to hide again. These were people who cared about him. They weren't going to hurt him.

     "Who did you see, Kenma?" Kuroo murmured, pushing some hair out of Kenma's face. Kenma's bottom lip trembled at the caring gesture, and before he could stop it, tears were pooling in his eyes and streaming down his cheeks.

     "Him _,_ " he whimpered, screaming at Kuroo with his eyes what he couldn't force himself to say out loud. " _Him."_

     Understanding flashed in Kuroo's eyes, and Kenma watched fury roll over his expression like a storm cloud. He nearly flinched away from him, not used to seeing such anger coming from Kuroo. The dark haired man let out a low breath and reached up to gently wipe the tears off Kenma's cheeks.

     "Where is he?" he asked, voice hard and his body stiff.

     Kenma sniffled and dug his fingers into Kuroo's shirt. "Why do you want to know?"

     "So we can go and kick his ass," Kageyama growled viciously, but Kenma shook his head.

     "I don't want that," he told them, his voice firmer than it had been in a long time. "I...I don't want something from my past to damage something in my future. I may...have trauma from what... _he_ did to me, but I'm...moving past it."

     "But, Kenma," Shouyou finally spoke up, his voice eerily calm, "you can't expect me to not do something. Not after what you told me. About the hospital visits."

     Kenma sucked in a sharp breath at his words, watching the way Kuroo went utterly still from the corner of his eye.

     "Hospital visits?" The dark haired man repeated, and Shouyou nodded.

     "Kenma told Kageyama and me about them a few months after we became friends, during one of his attacks. He broke Kenma's arm for one visit. Another was for a fractured wrist. There were a couple for concussions. Two, right?" Shouyou turned to lock a hard, serious stare on Kenma, and he shrunk away from the look. "At least, the ones that I know of."

     "Oh, honey," Kayoko murmured from her bed, her voice wet and choked. Kenma fought and lost against another wave of tears.

     "I'm-" he let out a soft sob, "f-fine."

     "Like hell you are," Kuroo spat, manuvering Kenma off his lap and onto the couch and then standing up.

     "Where are you going?" Kenma asked, digging his fingers into the couch cushion underneath him.

     "To find that son of a bitch." Kuroo was through the door before either Kayoko or Kenma could call out his name. That didn't stop Kenma from racing after him, though.

     Kuroo was already almost at the elevator when Kenma ran out of the door to Kayoko's room, his shoulders set and his hands curled into fists by his sides. Kenma ran after him, nearly stumbling on his shaky legs, weak from his earlier panic and asthma attacks.

     "Kuroo, stop," he panted once he reached the taller man. Kuroo didn't say anything, just jabbed the down button to the elevator and waited quietly for it to arrive. After about thirty seconds of waiting, Kuroo growled in frustration and turned on his heel, stalking off down a hallway to their left. Kenma followed him, having to jog slightly to keep up with him.

     "Kuroo, don't do this. Please," he begged, wanting so badly to reach out a touch the other man, to get him to look at him, but he didn't dare. Not when Kuroo was this angry. He'd learned not to touch people when they were angry. It usually ended with him getting hurt.

     Kuroo didn't respond to him again, and Kenma watched him warily. The other man's silence was making Kenma anxious. He wanted to know what was going on in the dark haired man's head, what he was thinking. Suddenly, Kuroo turned and pushed open a door, and it was only after Kenma followed him through it that he realized it was to a stairwell.

     "Kuroo, stop," he tried again, tugging at the bottom of his shirt while he descended the stairs after the other man. Again, Kuroo didn't react to his voice, as if Kenma wasn't even there.

     Finally, Kenma had had enough. He lunged forward and grabbed the back of Kuroo's shirt, jerking him back so that he had to stop. "I said stop, Tetsurou!"

     Kuroo turned on him suddenly and grabbed Kenma's wrist tightly. "What do you expect me to do after I hear all of that?!" Kuroo's voice bounced off the metal walls of the stairwell, making Kenma flinch. "How can you expect me to  _not_ go find that...that...." Kuroo suddenly turned and kicked the wall closest to him, shouting in anger.

     "Because I asked you not to," Kenma replied quietly, his voice shaky.

     Kuroo turned back to him, red faced and breathing heavily. "It's not that simple, Kenma. Not after everything that fucker has done."

     Kenma shook his head and took a deep breath through his nose, trying to blink away his new tears that were threatening to spill over. "I don't want him to be a part of my life now." Despite his best efforts, a sob slipped through Kenma's lips and his tears streamed down his cheeks.

     Kuroo's fury seemed to evaporate at the sight of his tears, his grip on Kenma's wrist loosening until he was just barely holding it and his expression clearing of all anger. Kenma felt Kuroo gently cup his cheek, thumbing at the tears on his skin.

     "But he is, Kenma. Whether you want it or not, he's obviously affecting your life still," Kuroo whispered, his own voice choked and strained. "You had a panic attack from just seeing him, and before a few months ago, you would have one if you even _thought_ about him. He obviously traumatized you."

     Kenma sobbed again and ducked his head, knowing Kuroo was right. "I just don't want to be scared anymore," he whimpered, pulling his wrist out of Kuroo's grasp so he could cover his face with his hands while he cried. He'd been so scared for so long, and he was just so tired of it. Kuroo helped him, as did Shouyou and Kageyama and Akaashi. Even Bokuto. But they could only do so much.

     "You don't have to be scared, Kenma," Kuroo murmured to him, pulling at Kenma's shoulder until he leaned into Kuroo's chest so he could hold him tightly. "I love you, and I'm not going anywhere. Not unless you want me to. So, you don't have to worry." Kuroo pressed a kiss into his hair. "I've got you. You're safe."

     And, honestly? Kenma did feel safe then, wrapped in Kuroo's arms. He felt safer than he had in a long time. Slowly, he relaxed into Kuroo's embrace, his tears drying until he was calm enough to breathe regularly. Kuroo rocked his gently side to side while he held him, whispering softly in his ear.

     Eventually, Kenma pulled back enough so that he could stand on his toes and press a kiss to Kuroo's cheek. "Thank you," he murmured against tan skin, pressing another kiss there quickly.

     Kuroo ducked his head and kissed Kenma, pulling back after a few seconds to let out a soft sigh. "I'm sorry for shouting. And storming off like that. I just...why didn't you tell me about the hospital visits? That he had broken your arm, fractured your wrist, given you concussions?"

     Kenma shook his head with a shrug. "I...It's like you said. Talking about him used to send me into a panic. The only times I was only ever able to speak about him until recently were when I was already having a panic attack, like Shouyou said. And I don't want to talk about that when I'm with you. And I have never worried about anything like that happening with you. We dealt with the only trigger I've had regarding our relationship. Everything else wasn't something I was concerned about when it came to our relationship."

     Kuroo sighed again and grinned down at him. "I just, I want to know everything I can about you. And if I can learn something that will help you, then I would be more than happy to."

     Kenma couldn't help but smile a little, too. "I love you," he murmured, tilting his head up just a bit as an invitation.

     Kuroo's grin softened and he leaned down to meet Kenma's kiss. "I love you, too."

\\\

     After they had calmed down, the both of them had returned to Kayoko's room where the others were. There was no talk of Kuroo's outburst or what Shouyou had said.

     Instead, they talked about Kayoko. She told them stories of her past, about her best times in high school and her even better times in college. She told them about the time that she went on a roadtrip with her best friend at the time and got lost. They'd had to drive for hours before they could figure out where they were, but it was the best trip she'd ever been on.

     She told them about her first year of college when she moved out of her parents' house and into the dorms. She and her roommate had quickly hit it off and had become fast friends. They took the same Psyche class their first semester and, according to Kayoko, had tormented their poor professor.

     Then she told them about her third year of college, the year that she'd met Kuroo's father. "He was such a sweetheart," she told them, a fond smile stretching her lips. "We actually met through some friends. They set us up on a date, a movie." She shook her head and laughed softly with a fond smile.

     "It was a scary movie, which your father hated, but he wanted to impress me. He ended up spilling his drink all over himself when he jumped at something." Kenma watched Kuroo listen to his mother's stories with rapt attention, as if he were trying to memorize every detail. It was nice to see him smiling and laughing with her.

     Eventually, Kageyama and Shouyou had to leave so they could open up Dog-Eared for the afternoon. Kenma had him leave the paperwork that still needed to be finished with him, saying that he would bring it in to work the next day. Shouyou thanked him profusely and promised Kayoko that he and Kageyama would visit again soon, his boyfriend nodding in agreement behind him.

     They talked a little longer after Shouyou and Kageyama left, Kayoko and Kuroo reminiscing about funny stories of their past. Kenma laughed with them and tried to remember as much as he could. In fact, he wanted to remember this moment for as long as he could.

     Eventually, though, the stories dwindled and Kayoko started to nod off. Kuroo tried to help her get a little more comfortable, but she waved him off.

     "You both should go home. It's getting late," she told them, her eyes sliding closed.

     "We can stay a little longer, Mom. Don't worry about it," Kuroo replied, but she shook her head.

     "No, no. You two go home. Mrs. Nancy is coming by soon, so I won't be alone. Go get some rest." Kuroo tucked the blankets and sighed.

     "If you're sure..."

     Kayoko cracked her eyes open and smiled up at her son. "I'm sure, Tetsurou. Go home. Spend time with your boyfriend. I'll be here tomorrow."

     "You promise?"

     Kayoko nodded and reached out to take Kuroo's hand. "I promise," she whispered, squeezing his hand once before she let go. "I hope I get to see you tomorrow too, Kenma."

     "Of course," he murmured, coming to stand next to Kuroo.

     "Good. I love you both," she sighed, closing her eyes again as she settled more into her bed.

     "We love you, too," Kuroo said, and Kenma made a soft noise of agreement.

     Kuroo packed up his things, and they left after that, taking a cab to Kenma's apartment. They didn't talk much on the ride to his apartment. Kuroo did reach out and offer his hand to Kenma though, who gladly took it. It was nice to feel Kuroo's palm pressed against his own, the larger man's warmth transferring over to Kenma's icy fingers.

     Kuroo reached over with his other hand and began tracing patterns on the back of Kenma's hand, his touch so light that Kenma could barely feel it. Then, like on their first date, Kuroo lifted Kenma's hand to his mouth and blew warm air against it.

     The heat seemed to crawl up his arm and rest in his cheeks and stomach, and when Kuroo glanced at him through his lashes, a pang of arousal shot through him. He bit his bottom lip to keep a quiet moan from escaping, but it didn't seem to matter. Kuroo looked at him like he'd heard it anyway as he pressed a kiss against the back of Kenma's hand.

     Kuroo behaved himself from then on though, but he kept a tight hold on Kenma's hand, only letting go to pay the cabbie when they stopped at Kenma's apartment building. Kenma told him he could pay, but Kuroo insisted, pressing a kiss to Kenma's forehead.

     Kenma shook his head and tried to hide his smile, turning to start up the steps to his apartment. Once he reached his door, he could hear Kuroo coming up the stairs after him, and he quickly unlocked his door.

     The moment he stepped foot through the doorway, Frank came sprinting towards him and slammed his shoulders into his shins, babbling at him. Kenma chuckled and bent down to pet the ginger cat.

     "Well, hello to you, too," he mused, running his fingers through Frank's fur. The cat meowed up at him as if to say, 'I've been so loney! Where have you been?!'

     Kuroo's laugh from behind him made Kenma jump. "I guess he missed you." Kenma turned and smiled up at the dark haired man with a nod.

     He scooped Frank up in his arms and carried him inside, going into the small kitchen. "Are you hungry?" Frank meowed up at him "Awe, you poor thing," he cooed, rubbing his forehead against the cat's.

     He set Frank down next to his food bowl (Which was about a third full) and filled it. "Do you want anything to eat?" he asked Kuroo, turning to face the other man.

     In a split second, Kuroo crowded Kenma's space and caged him in against the counter top with his arms, bending down to brush his lips against Kenma's. Kenma gasped at the sudden movement but didn't pull away, his previous feeling of arousal spearing through him again.

     "I'd rather have you," Kuroo breathed against his lips, his lidded eyes glancing down at Kenma's mouth.

     Kenma didn't bother with a reply; he simply push forward and closed the distance between them, sealing their lips in a heated kiss. Kuroo leaned into him, pressing their bodies together until there was no room between them, and lifted a hand from the counter top to cup Kenma's jaw and angle his head.

     Kenma gasped softly when he felt Kuroo's tongue gently swipe across his lips, asking for entrance, and Kenma let him in, sucking on the wet muscle hard enough to make Kuroo groan. He felt hands on him, rubbing at his hips and stomach. He arched into the touches, wanting more; more heat; more feeling. More of Kuroo.

     "I've got you," Kuroo whispered to him, slipping a leg between Kenma's thighs so he could rock his hips into the firm muscle. "Don't hold back. I've got you."

     Kenma ground desperately into Kuroo's thigh, panting as arousal wound tight just under his stomach. Kuroo slipped a hand under his shirt, fingers mapping out his smooth skin until he found a nipple. Kenma gasped when Kuroo flicked over the sensitive skin, rubbing and pulling until it pebbled under his touch.

     Kenma tugged on the hair in his grasp when Kuroo moved his mouth to his neck, nipping and sucking marks into the pale skin there. Despite the pleasure coursing through his body and scrambling his thoughts, Kenma still had enough of his wits about him to notice the hardness pressing against the lower part of his stomach.

     Kuroo wretched his mouth from the skin he'd been feasting on when Kenma slipped his smaller hand down to grind his palm into Kuroo's groin. "Ah! Fuck, Kenma," he groaned, his hips twitching against Kenma's hand.

     "Tetsurou," he murmured, leaning forward so he could close his teeth about Kuroo's bottom lip. The dark haired man let out a shaky moan and moved his hands down the the backs of Kenma's thighs, hoisting him up so he could sit on the counter top behind him.

     Kenma gasped at the sudden movement, but the noise quickly changed into a throaty moan as Kuroo pressed their hips together at the new angle. He surged forward to easily kiss his boyfriend, digging his fingers into Kuroo's back so he could feel the muscles shifting under his shirt. Kuroo quickly took charge of the kiss, licking into Kenma's mouth so he could taste every inch of him.

     A sudden tug on his pants made Kenma pull back, glancing down to see Kuroo's hands fumbling with the button of his jeans. He released his hold on Kuroo's back to join his efforts, lifting his hips a bit to help Kuroo tug his jeans and briefs down his thighs when they managed to undo the clasp.

     Kenma was quick to move his attention to Kuroo's own pants, before the taller man had a chance to distract him with a hand on his aching cock, his nimble fingers making easy work of the button and zipper. Kuroo shoved them down along with his boxers, sighing with relief as his dick was released from its confinement.

     They both eagerly pressed their hips back together, Kuroo moaning and Kenma crying out at the feeling. Kuroo's large hand wrapped around their cocks, rubbing the silky, slick skin together. Kenma arched his hips into the touch, gasping at the feel of Kuroo's hot, throbbing arousal against his.

     "Tet-Tetsurou, I can't-" he was cut off with a moan when Kuroo flicked his wrist just right. "I'm gonna cum."

     Kuroo leaned his forehead against Kenma's, nodding against his sweaty skin. "Yeah, me too," he panted, moving his hand faster over their cocks. It had been nearly two weeks since they'd really touched each other like this, much too long for them to last any significant amount of time.

     The slick sounds of Kuroo's hand moving over their heated skin echoed through the small kitchen were making Kenma lightheaded, and he had to wrap a hand around the back of Kuroo's neck to help keep himself steady where he was perched on the counter top. He could vaguely hear himself letting out higher and higher pitched cries as he neared his peak, but he couldn't bother himself care about it. Not when he could feel Kuroo shuddering against him and hear Kuroo groaning his name in the low timber his voice took on when he was this far gone.

     "Tetsurou,  _ah_...'m close...." Kenma panted, his fingers tightening in the hair at the base of Kuroo's neck. Kuroo pushed forward just enough to press a kiss to Kenma's lips before he pulled away again.

     "I love you." Those words, whispered so closely that he could feel them form on the other's lips, were the last straw. The tension that had been building within him snapped, and he came with a shout. Kuroo kept his hand moving, prolonging Kenma's release.

     Kuroo must have came soon after him, because when Kenma finally managed to open his eyes Kuroo's hand had finally stopped and the taller man was gasping like he'd just finished a marathon. Kenma stared Kuroo's face, watching the way his eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks as the last waves of pleasure left him.

     Kenma reached up with a shaky hand and brushed Kuroo's sweaty bangs out of his face. "I love you, too," he breathed, pressing a kiss to Kuroo's forehead. The dark haired man hummed softly, pleased by the affectionate gesture. They stayed there for a few minutes, leaning against each other so they could be close for just a little while longer.

     Eventually, though, Kuroo pulled back and glanced down at the mess between them they had made and smiled at Kenma warmly. "Shower?"

     Kenma nodded. "Then, food." And Kuroo eagerly agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tada! KuroKen smut! Now I have finally made use of that hand job tag.
> 
> I hope you all liked it! There's quite a bit of stuff going on in this chapter, I know. But I had a sudden rush of inspiration, so I figured I should use it while I could.
> 
> I've been thinking about adding in some Akaashi or Kageyama centered chapters (with a little BoAka and KageHina mixed in there, of course). I think it'll add some depth to the story to hear from some different perspectives. Let me know what you guys think!
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! As always, please feel free to leave a kudo or a comment if you want to. They make my day. I'll see you all next time!


	20. Change of Venue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo and Kenma let out some much needed tension, and Kenma asks a question that brings a big change in their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just gonna...change the rating of this fic...yeah, that's better. I figured it was probably for the best to change this to explicit. You know, just in case.
> 
> Anyway, I'm alive and kicking! Here's some smut, because fuck it (and Kenma), they both need some lovin' after the day they've had. (Sorry it's a little short, but it's what I got right now, haha.) Thank you so much for reading, you guys! It means a lot to me. Hope you enjoy!

*Kuroo's POV*

     Kuroo didn't know what it was about Kenma's shower that made him so horny, but for some reason, whenever he managed to get Kenma into the small, tiled room with him, he couldn't help but do everything he could to get his hands on him. There was just something about the way the steam from the hot water made Kenma's skin take on a pink tinge and how he became so pliable under Kuroo's hands. It made him want to ravage him, give him every kind of pleasure he could ever want. Kenma deserved it, and Kuroo was determined to show that to him.

     Currently, he had Kenma leaning back against one of the shower walls as he trailed his lips over every inch of the smooth, soft skin in front of him. Kuroo watched Kenma writhe against the tiles behind him when his tongue brushed a sensitive spot on one of his hips, and he smirked, wrapping his lips around the pale flesh to nip and  _suck_  at the spot. Kenma's hips jerked and a soft cry escaped him past the hand he had pressed against his mouth despite Kuroo's protests at him trying to cover up the noises he was making.

     "I wanna hear you," he murmured for the second time since they had stepped in the shower, flattening his tongue against the new mark he had made on Kenma's hip to lap at the hypersensitive skin there. Kenma whimpered in what sounded like an attempt at a protest, but soon his hand shakily fell away from his mouth to thread his fingers through Kuroo's hair. Kuroo hummed in appreciation when the smaller made gave a gentle tug at his dark locks, a spark of heat flooding though his body. He glanced up at his boyfriend through his lashes, trying to keep water out of his eyes, and saw Kenma staring down at him pleadingly as he bit his poor bottom lip raw. "What do you want, Kitten?"

     Kuroo didn't miss the way the pet-name affected Kenma, his eyelids fluttering over his golden irises as he drew in a sharp, shaky breath. The hand in his hair tightened slightly as Kenma seemingly subconsciously rolled his hips forward gently, and, after a moment, his eyes opened again to meet Kuroo's stare. "Touch me, Tetsurou," he whispered. "Please."

     How was Kuroo supposed to say no when his little Kitten asked so nicely?

     "Whatever you want," Kuroo breathed, letting his hands slide up Kenma's sides until his thumbs could brush against his chest, touching the pink nipples he found there. Kenma threw his head back against the wall behind him and cried out again, this time letting his voice echo in the small room. Kuroo groaned softly and shuddered at the noise, pressing his forehead to the slim stomach in front of him. He would do anything to keep Kenma making those sounds.

     "I...I want you," a soft voice said above him. "Please, I want...want you inside me. Tetsurou...need it." Kuroo's breath caught in his throat at Kenma's words, and he had to close his eyes tight against the wave of arousal that washed through him at those words.

     "Shit," he breathed. "Shit, Kenma. You're gonna kill me if you keep talking like that." Kenma just whimpered again and rolled his hips in one smooth motion, trying to get Kuroo to move, to give him what he wanted. "Alright, alright," he told him, reaching for the small bottle of lube he'd brought with them into the shower and slicking his fingers with it. "Let me get you ready for me."

     Without hesitation, Kenma spread his legs when Kuroo touched the inside of his milky thighs, not needing any sort of prompting. Kuroo swallowed hard at how eager his boyfriend was, not used to seeing this side of him. He may actually die from how hot and bothered Kenma was getting him tonight. He was glad that he and Bokuto had made their wills recently when they had been toying with the idea of going skydiving. (Just in case.)

     A quick tug at his hair brought Kuroo back to his senses, and he grinned up at Kenma as he slowly made his way up the backs of the soft, milky thighs in front of him, taking his time to truly appreciate every bit of the quivering muscles he could touch. When his finger tips met with the smooth curve of Kenma's ass, he paused to cup rounded flesh in his palms and leaned forward to presses kisses against the crease of his hip. Kenma's pink cock twitched against his cheek when he gently squeezed his boyfriend's ass and a soft and shaky, desperate cry spilled out of Kenma as he pushed back into Kuroo's hold.

     "Shh," he breathed against Kenma's skin, reassuring. "Shh, I've got you. I'll give you whatever you want. Anything. Everything." Carefully, he slipped his fingers up and into the cleft of Kenma's ass, brushing them against the puckered flesh of his entrance and murmuring softly again when Kenma choked out a whimper at his touch. Kuroo was glad that he had taken his time to explore Kenma's body when he had because he'd managed to help Kenma relax enough that the first push past the ring of muscles was smooth and easy enough. Kenma sighed when Kuroo's finger slid in until he could move it no further.

     Kuroo pressed kisses against Kenma's lower stomach as he thrust his finger, waiting for the smaller man to relax enough for him to slip another in. But it didn't seem like he had to wait long.

     "More," Kenma said, the word rushing out of him with a gasp of air. "Please, I want more."

     Kuroo was quick to oblige his boyfriend's wishes, pressing a second finger in along side the first. Kenma groaned lowly and rolled his hips down onto Kuroo's hand, and Kuroo thought his soul was going to leave his body as he watched Kenma's body move, smooth and sure. Taking what he wanted.

     "That's it. Take it. Whatever you want, you can have it. I'll give it to you. All you have to do it take it." Kuroo meant every word he said. He'd give Kenma the world, if he wanted it. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against the pale skin of Kenma's lower stomach, sucking at his flesh until he was sure there would be a dark mark left behind. He wanted to let everyone know it was Kuroo who got to see Kenma like this, and only him. Kenma arched his back at the feeling, and Kuroo curled his fingers inside his tight body, finding the right spot on the first try.

     " _Ah!_ Oh,  _God!_ There...there, there. Please, Tetsurou. Give it to me. I...I want it." Kenma moaned, writhing on Kuroo's fingers. "Fuck me."

     Kuroo didn't even hesitate, carefully slipping his fingers out of Kenma so that he could stand and lifted Kenma up so that he could wrap his legs around Kuroo's waist. While he wasn't sure what had gotten into Kenma, he wasn't about to deny him what he clearly knew he wanted. So, with a little more pleading from his boyfriend for him to just  _hurry up, Kuroo_ and some more lube, Kuroo carefully slipped inside Kenma's small, shaking body with a blissed-out groan.

     "Oh...oh, Kenma. Fuck, you feel...," he breathed, trailing off with a choked off groan when Kenma clenched around him, making soft, little noises of pleasure himself. Kenma's fingers gripped at Kuroo's shoulders, his blunt nails digging into his skin just right.

     "Does it...does it feel good?" Kenma sighed, his lips brushing against Kuroo's ear with every word. "Inside me?"

     Kuroo quickly pulled back so he could look Kenma in the eye, taking a hand off one of the other's hips so he could cup one of Kenma's cheeks and get his full attention. "You feel amazing." Kenma's eyes widened at Kuroo's words, at the strong conviction that he spoke with. "It's like we were made for each other. You take me so well."

     "Ah..." Kenma gasped out when Kuroo suddenly thrust, pressing up tight against his ass and staying there to grind into him.

     "I love being inside you. If I could do this all day with you, I would." Kenma sobbed out a shaky moan as Kuroo started to thrust in earnest again. "God, I love you. I love you so much."

     Kenma wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him in close, moaning in his ear as Kuroo fucked him against the shower wall. "Ah! Nngh... _hah_ , I love you, too. I love you." The phrase became a mantra for the smaller man as Kuroo fucked into him, pushing him closer and closer to the edge while Kuroo chased his climax, too. He needed this; Kuroo needed the distraction from everything that had happened recently. His mom being in the hospital, the fight with Bo, and Kenma's ex's sudden appearance, all of these things, he just needed one night that he didn't have to think about them. And he had a feeling Kenma knew this and probably needed a night without worrying, too. Kuroo would be more than happy to help him with it.

     "I've got you," he murmured against Kenma's cheek, pressing a kiss to the flushed skin there. "Let go. I've got you."

     Kenma sobbed again and arched his back at a well placed thrust, tears streaming down his face. Kuroo would have been worried about the sudden appearance of the salty substance if it weren't for the blissed out moans that were pouring out of Kenma's mouth. Instead, he slipped a hand between their bodies and wrapped his fingers around Kenma's leaking cock, stroking him firmly. Kenma jerked in his hold, crying out sharply at the pleasure that was spearing through him at the added stimulation. It only took a few more thrusts, once, twice, a final third time, and Kenma was spilling over Kuroo's hand, his body fluttering around him, sucking him in deeper.

     "Oh,  _fuck_ ," Kuroo gasped, his hips stuttering against Kenma's ass as he finished, too. He peppered soft kisses across Kenma's tear-stained cheeks and down his throat, letting the smaller man come down from his high slowly, and Kenma clutched at him, unwilling to let any space form between them.

     Once their breathing had returned to something that resembled normal and aftershocks were no longer rocking through their bodies, Kuroo pulled out of Kenma's small, shaking body, drawing soft whimpers from his boyfriend. Kuroo quickly cleaned them both up, letting Kenma lean heavily against him as he washed off the rest of the day's stresses. When he finished, he turned the shower off, wrapped Kenma in a towel, and carried him to his room. He dried him off after setting the smaller body on the bed and quickly did the same to himself, moving to get them both a new change of clothes while Kenma dozed.

     He quickly came back with a new pair of underwear and a fluffy sweater for Kenma and a pair of boxers and some sweat pants for himself from the stash he had started keeping at Kenma's apartment. After helping Kenma get dressed, Kuroo flopped down on the bed beside his boyfriend, pulling the other against his chest with a sigh.

     "You still want something to eat?" he asked softly, running his fingers through Kenma's damp, two-toned strands. The smaller man shook his head against Kuroo's chest and let out what Kuroo deemed a much too adorable yawn. "You wanna go to bed?" Kenma nodded, and Kuroo smiled, moving them up the bed and pulling the covers over them both. Kenma settled against his chest with a familiarity that sent a wave of affection through Kuroo, making him pull his boyfriend closer and press a kiss to his forehead. A soft mumble came from the lump of cuddly boyfriend in his arms, and he pulled back to give Kenma room to talk.

     "What?" he whispered, brushing some hair away from Kenma's face. Sleepy but nervous, golden eyes peered back at him as Kenma fidgeted with the sleeves of his sweater. Worry started to settle uneasily in Kuroo's stomach at how Kenma was acting. Had he accidentally hurt him? "Kenma?"

     "I...I've been thinking about something," Kenma said, glancing down at his hands where they rested against Kuroo's chest, and Kuroo nodded and rubbed a hand over his boyfriend's back to show that he was listening. "What would...what would you think about...us moving in together?" Kuroo had to lean closer to hear what the little ball of nerves had said, and when he understood his eyes widened and his breath caught in his throat.

     Kenma noticed the change in him immediately and began to nervously babble. "It's just...we spend so much time together, and I know going back and forth between our apartments is a bit of a hassle." He quickly shook his head and looked up at Kuroo with big, round eyes. "Not that I mind doing it! If you don't want to move in together, I'm fine with doing that. I just...thought that it would save us time and money. And I know Frank gets lonely, and he really likes you. And it doesn't have to be permanent, I just...just know I'll be able to take care of you better that way, and it would make me...feel better. Happier. Being with you like that. A-and I just -"

     Kuroo quickly cut off his poor boyfriend's anxious rambling, pressing their lips together in a sloppy, rushed kiss that was more teeth clacking together than anything else. But it got Kenma to stop talking and gave Kuroo a moment to try and get his brain working enough to answer his absolutely adorable Kitten.

     "I would love to move in together," Kuroo breathed the moment they parted, not missing the way Kenma's whole body relaxed.

     "Really?" Kuroo nodded furiously and wiped away a tear that strayed from Kenma's eye with a thumb, smiling down at him.

     "Really really. I love you _so_ much, Kenma. I hate it when I have to leave you. When I have to go to a different apartment when nothing feels like home without you." A sob hiccuped out of Kenma and he pushed forward to press a kiss of his own against Kuroo's lips, this one much softer than the one Kuroo had initiated.

     Kuroo kissed him back gently, lifting a hand to carefully cradle Kenma's face so he could brush his thumb against his boyfriend's soft cheek. His chest felt like it was going to burst. He had too many emotions swirling around inside him. He was too happy, too grateful for Kenma, too full of love for him. He didn't even realize he'd started crying too until Kenma reached up and brushed at his cheeks, his small fingers coming back wet. Kuroo sniffled and laughed softly, smiling down at Kenma.

     "I love you," he whispered, and Kenma smiled back at him.

     "I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tada! That was probably the most explicit sex scene I've written for this fic. Fun stuff. Also, hooray! Plot movement! Kenma is so fucking cute, espeically from Kuroo's perspective. Speaking of which, this is the first time I've ever written so much in Kuroo's POV. I think it went pretty well, if I do say so myself.
> 
> Anyway, I'm still thinking about writing a Akaashi and/or Kageyama centered chapter. Let me know what you guys think about whether I should do it or not. I mean, if you're only here for KuroKen, I'll just have to make a new work or something.
> 
> If you guys have enjoyed this so far, you might wanna check out my IwaOi work that I've just started called Kiss Your Bruises and let me know what you think of it so far. If you do, don't hesitate to let me know you're one of my lovelies from this fic! I love you all so much!
> 
> Anyway, thanks so much for reading this. I hope you enjoyed it and much as I enjoyed writing it. Leave a kudos and/or comment if you want to. They make my day! And, as always, I'll see you next chapter!


	21. Patching Up, In More Ways Than One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi and Kenma decide it's time for their boyfriends to make-up, but in the mean time, Kenma struggles with a problem of his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello! Alright, guys, here's some actual plot and not just an excuse for me to write some smut. (No shame.) This chapter is actually based off an event that happened to me recently, so you know it's gonna be fun! (Maybe not for Kenma, though.)
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! I hope you guys enjoy it!

     Kenma woke up the next morning slowly, wrapped in warmth and comfort. He nuzzled forward into Kuroo's sleep-warm skin, content to simply go back to sleep, but it seemed that Frank had other plans. As if the orange tabby could sense that Kenma was awake, he came sprinting into the bedroom babbling like crazy, as if to say, "You're up. Good! Food time, now!"

     Kenma huffed a sigh and forced himself out of bed, careful not to wake Kuroo up. The dark haired man groaned and felt around at the empty spot Kenma had left for a minute before he simply rolled over and smashed his face even further into the pillow he was holding. Kenma rolled his eyes fondly at his boyfriend and shuffled into the kitchen after his cat.

     He quickly pulled out a can of wet cat food and opened it, setting it down so Frank could eat his breakfast. The ginger cat did so with a tail flick of thanks towards his owner. Kenma snorted and moved to make some coffee and toast.

     While he was waiting for the liquid energy to brew, he heard a  _ping!_ from his phone come from the counter behind him. He quickly shuffled over and checked the notification. It was a text. From Akaashi.

      He thought it was time for Bokuto and Kuroo to talk about the incident that happened the other night. Bokuto had been pouting and moping around for the past two days. Kenma could see it now, Bokuto moping around he and Akaashi's apartment with black eyes and a swollen nose and clinging to Akaashi any chance he could get. Honestly, Kenma thought that he deserved to have at least a day or two of moping after what he had said to Kuroo. Granted, Kenma knew he had been drunk and not completely aware of exactly what he was saying, but in Kenma's mind that didn't mean he should get off easy.

     Kenma quickly started to reply, saying he'd talk to Kuroo about it, when another cell phone went off in his room. He hurried after the noise, not wanting it to wake up Kuroo when he was sleeping so fitfully. He had to stop when he tip-toed into his room, caught up at the sight that was waiting for him. Kuroo was draped over on his stomach facing the door, one of his arms hanging off the bed while the other was shoved somewhere under the pillows. He looked so at peace. Kenma had the sudden urge to crawl back into bed with him and just sleep the day away. Forget their worries for just one day. But the urge quickly passed when Kuroo's ringing phone pulled him out of his thoughts, and he reached for the device. Only for his heart to stop when he saw the name of the caller ID:  **Mom's Hospital**.

     A million things raced through Kenma's head, the most prevalent one being  _What if she's died?_ And, for a brief moment, he couldn't breathe, couldn't cope with the idea. He almost couldn't answer the call. But he had to know, so he could be a buffer for Kuroo from the information. So, quickly, before the call ended, he picked up Kuroo's cell with an only slightly shaking hand and answered.

     "Hello?" he breathed, heart hammering in his chest.

     "Hello, this is Sacred Medical Hospital. Is this Kuroo Tetsurou?" A chirpy, female voice came from over the line.

     "U-um, no. But I can take a message for him. He's sleeping right now." There was a soft hum of acknowledgement from the woman on the other end of the call.

     "Ah, well, it's customary for family members of patients to give blood, so, if you would, please let Kuroo-san know." Kenma blinked for a moment, staring straight ahead at the wall in front of him, before he slowly sank down onto the bed behind him.

     He couldn't help the one, harsh bark of a laugh that burst out of him at the absurdity of the statement. "You're telling me," he said, fingers clenching hard around the phone in his hand, "that you called Kuroo this early in the morning to ask him to come and give blood?"

     The woman's answer came much more hesitantly this time. "Well, yes. But, as I said before, it's -"

     "It's customary, yes. I heard you the first time." Kenma cut her off abruptly, his cheeks beginning to feel hot with the anger that was surging through him. "Let me ask you a question. Are you sitting in front of a computer right now?"

     "Um, yes?"

     "And do you have Kuroo's information pulled up right now?"

     "Yes."

     "Then you know what their family is going through. Do you really think Kuroo is going to have the time to give blood when his mother is in your hospital dying from cancer? Would you want someone to call you this early in the morning after spending as much time as possible with your sick mother the night before to ask you to give more than you already have? Because it's  _customary?"_   Kenma was close to snarling the words into the phone when he finished speaking. Normally, he was the last person to go out of his way to confront someone, but this had crossed the line. Kuroo had been through enough in the past two days, let alone however many years he and his mother had been dealing with her cancer. He did not need to be bothered by this nonsense.

     "I understand they're going through a hard time, but -"

     "But nothing. You have no idea what they're going through. Don't call him about this again." Kenma hung up then, glaring at the comforter clenched in his hand that wasn't holding Kuroo's phone. He hadn't noticed before, but now that he wasn't talking to the ridiculous woman on the phone, he realized he was breathing heavy with anger.

     He jumped at a sudden soft touch against the back of one of his hands. He whipped his head over to see Kuroo staring up at him from his spot on the bed. A small smile was curling the corners of his mouth up just slightly. Kenma let out a shaky breath.

     "Good morning," Kuroo said before Kenma could even decide what he was going to say about the conversation that Kuroo had most definitely heard.

     "Morning." Kenma set Kuroo's phone back on the bedside table. "I'm sorry if I woke you up." Kuroo shook his head and pushed himself up on one elbow.

     "Don't worry about it. I'm hungry, anyway." A moment of silence fell over them, in which Kuroo gently drew lines on the back of Kenma's hand with his finger and Kenma tried to calm himself. But it didn't last long. "Who was that? On the phone?"

     Kenma sighed and sent a glance at the device sitting on the bedside table. "It...it was the hospital. It wasn't about your mother." He took a breath before he continued. "They wanted you to come in and give blood."

     "Ah, yeah. Some hospitals have a policy about that." Kuroo shrugged and sat up, scratching at the back of his head as he yawned. Kenma blinked at him in surprise.

     "You...That doesn't bother you?" Kuroo turned to him and smiled softly.

     "Thank you. For getting upset for me." Kenma ducked his head. "It means a lot to me. More than I could ever tell you. But I'll go do it. Mom would want me to." Kenma nodded and tugged the sleeves of his shirt over his hands and balled them up in his fists. He'd overstepped.

     "Right," he mumbled, letting his hair fall around his face as he stood up. "There's coffee and toast in the kitchen."

     Kuroo caught Kenma's hand before he could escape out of the room, pulling him into his lap and wrapping his arms around him. "Really, thank you," he murmured into Kenma's hair, his scalp warming with Kuroo's breath. "I love you." Kenma pressed his face into the skin of his boyfriend's neck and nodded.

     "I love you, too." Kuroo let out a noise of happiness and kissed Kenma on the forehead.

     "Time for breakfast," Kuroo announced shortly after, picking Kenma up as if he weighed nothing and carried him into the kitchen, setting him down on the counter. "You stay right there while your amazing, cool boyfriend cooks you a mouthwatering breakfast."

     Kenma hid his bemused smile behind a sleeve, kicking his feet lightly against the cabinets. He was content to watch Kuroo pull cooking supplies out and make their breakfast all while only dressed in a pair of sweats that hung loosely around his hips, but a  _ping!_ from his right tore his attention away from the truly delicious sight in front of him that was Kuroo bending over. It was another text from Akaashi, asking what Kenma thought of his proposal.

     "Akaashi is wondering if you would be willing to meet up with Bokuto and try to make up. He says Bokuto has been moping around their apartment for the past two days." Kuroo stiffened for a moment, back muscles tense as he let his head hang forward between his shoulders. At first, Kenma thought he'd done the wrong thing in telling Kuroo this soon, but then Kuroo let out a low sigh and sniffed once before nodding his head and continuing making their breakfast.

     "Yeah. Yeah, tell him they can meet up with us at the hospital. I'll make Bo give blood with me." Kenma watched him closely for a moment before he hummed in agreement and sent Akaashi Kuroo's answer. "Ah, speaking of which, do you want to, too?"

     Kenma paused in typing out a reply to another of Akaashi's text, thumbs hovering over his screen, and glanced up at Kuroo in question. "Want to what?"

     "Give blood. I mean, I know that often times, hospitals could use as much donated blood as they can get, since it expires so quickly and they don't use much of it often." Kuroo was busy cracking eggs into a frying pan to notice how Kenma froze and started to sweat. "Besides, I don't really like needles, and it's nice to have someone else come donate with you. What do you say -" Kuroo abruptly cut himself off when he turned from his task at hand and saw how pale Kenma was. "Kenma? Hey, are you okay?"

     Kuroo quickly rushed to him, placing one hand on Kenma's thigh and the other on one of his cheeks. Kenma hummed in response, nodding his head. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay," he said after clearing his throat. "I'm fine. I'll go and...donate with you."

     "Kenma, you don't have to it you don't want to. I'll be fine if you don't want to. I mean, Bo'll be there." Kuroo bent in front of him to look him in the eye, and Kenma shook his head.

     "No, no, I'm okay. I want to." Kenma mentally patted himself on the back for keeping his voice steady, even though he wanted nothing more than to whine and whimper at the very thought of giving blood. It wasn't that he was opposed to the idea, far from it. He just had one too many bad experiences when it came to having his blood taken for tests, let alone donating blood. Kuroo frowned up at him, not convinced. "I promise, Kuroo. I want to do this with you."

     Kuroo stared at him for a moment longer before he sighed and stood up, moving back to their cooking eggs. "Alright. But I'm watching you, Mister Sir."

     Kenma nodded and finished his text to Akaashi before locking his phone and accepting the mug of coffee Kuroo passed to him. He stared down at the drink. Black. No cream or sugar. The way you had to drink it if you were going to give blood the same day. Kenma swallowed hard tried to focus on something else.

//

     Kenma tightened his grip on the shoulder strap of his satchel as they walked to the entrance of the hospital. He had three or four good reasons why he didn't want to go in the building, but one of the two great reasons he  _needed_ to go in the building was holding his hand, speaking reassuringly to him.

     "Now, if you see that son of a bitch again, you tell me right away. I'll take care of it. I promise, he won't touch you again." Kuroo looked down at him, making sure Kenma was listening to him. He nodded and squeezed Kuroo's hand.

     "Okay," Kenma whispered, keeping his head down as they walked through the hospital's automatic doors. Akaashi and Bokuto had agreed to meet them at the hospital, Bokuto more than happy to join Kenma and Kuroo in giving blood. Akaashi had declined so someone would be able to watch over the three of them afterwards. Kenma was currently wishing he had thought of that, but it was a little too late to turn back now. Especially now that Kuroo was currently leading him to the front desk to ask about where they were supposed to go.

     "Kuroo, bro!" Kenma and Kuroo both turned at the sound of the familiar voice. Only for the blur of muscle that is Bokuto Koutarou to come crashing into Kuroo, wrapping the tall man into a what Kenma could only assume was a bone crushing hug. Immediately, Kuroo returned the embrace with just as much enthusiasm, ducking his head to hide his face in Bokuto's two-toned hair.

     "Hey, Bo," Kuroo said softly, squeezing the large man in his arms even tighter. Bokuto suddenly ripped himself out of Kuroo's hold and gripped his shoulders, his eyes glistening wetly. There were two smudges of dark purple that came from Bokuto's nose and bled under his eyes. Clear bruises from the punch Kuroo had landed. Kuroo must have noticed them too if the guilty look in his eyes said anything.

     "Kuroo, I'm so sorry for what I said the other night. I didn't mean it. I'm just worried about you, man. I just want you to have a breather every once in a while, that's all," Bokuto quickly spewed, each and every one of his words coated in sincerity. "You know how much I love Mom."

     Kuroo nodded quickly, blinking rapidly to keep from crying. "I know, man. I know. I'm sorry for punching you. I shouldn't have done that. Not to my brother, man."

     Bokuto shook his head. "No, I deserved it. I'm glad you did." The two men quickly embraced again. Kenma blinked at them, trying to process everything that had just happened in such a brief moment.

     "Kuroo-san and Bokuto-san have a special relationship." Kenma nearly jumped at the sound of Akaashi's voice as the quiet man stepped up beside him. Kenma nodded.

     "Yeah, I'm well aware of how...close they are," Kenma whispered back, but Akaashi shook his head.

     "You know how they are around each other now, but it goes even further than that. Kuroo-san probably hasn't told you because it's more personal to Bokuto-san than it is to Kuroo-san," Akaashi murmured, glancing at Bokuto sadly. "Bokuto-san's mother died when he was in middle school, leaving him with an abusive father. When he and Kuroo-san met in college, Kuroo-san's mother took Bokuto-san under her wing, treated him like family. As far as she was concerned, Kuroo-san and Bokuto-san were brothers. They lost touch after they graduated from undergrad school, but obviously it didn't last long." Akaashi fidgeted with his fingers as he glanced back at Kenma. "Thank you for asking Kuroo-san to meet up with him. Bokuto-san doesn't show it, but he's taking all of this very hard. They need each other right now."

     Kenma nodded. In fact, he couldn't agree with Akaashi more. Bokuto was able to give Kuroo something that Kenma himself couldn't. A different kind of love. And honestly Kenma was grateful to the boisterous man for it.

     Finally, after a few more minutes of hugging and murmuring to each other, the two tall men separated and patted each other on the back, grinning widely. "Alright, Bo. You ready for this?" Kuroo asked, leading the four of them down a hallway that had a sign labeled "Labs".

     "Hell yeah, bro! You know it!" Bokuto turned back to Akaashi and Kenma with a grin. "Nurses love me cuz I'm a good stick. Whatever that means."

     "Bokuto-san has very good veins," Akaashi explained, and Kenma nodded. He was fairly sure that Kuroo had good veins, too. Himself, on the other hand, was an entirely different story. After his many hospital visits he soon found out that he had terrible veins, as he'd been told many times. They were small and they rolled, which made having blood drawn a long and painful process. But, if it helped Kuroo in some way, then he was willing to go through it.

     "I'm not a huge fan of giving blood," Kuroo said a little sheepishly, rubbing at the back of his head, "but I'm a pro at drawing it. All the professors at my school say I have the magic touch." Kenma felt a small wave of pride wash over him for his boyfriend, helping him ignore the nerves that were writhing in his stomach. Kenma was aware of how hard Kuroo worked in his studies and knowing it was something the dark haired man took pride in himself made Kenma feel a swell of affection in his chest.

     Those feelings took a nose dive though when they came to a stop at a desk outside a room filled with medical beds and chairs made to hold people up in case they feinted while they were giving blood. His heart started hammering in his chest, and he felt his palms start to sweat. He focused on his breathing while Kuroo informed the nurse at the desk who they all were and what they were there for. He could do this. All he had to do was grit his teeth and bare it.

    "Kenma." He jumped at Kuroo's call, not expecting the man to be right next to him. "You okay?"

    "Yeah," he replied in a thin voice. "Yeah, I'm okay. Are they ready for us?"

     Kuroo nodded but watched Kenma closely. "They aren't very busy right now, so they can fit us in real quick. Works out for everyone." A warm hand came to rest on Kenma's back, reassuring him. "Are you sure you want to do this? You really don't have to. You just being here is more than enough, honest."

     Kenma shook his head and stepped into the room behind the desk. "I'm really okay, Kuroo. I want to do this with you."

     Kuroo huffed but followed him without any more attempts at talking to him about it. Back in the room, Bokuto was already being prepped to have his blood drawn, sitting down with one arm set out on the arm rest in front of him. Akaashi was holding his free hand while one of the nurses tied a rubber strip around his arm and swabbed a spot on the inside of his elbow.

     "Can we go get ice cream after this, 'kaashi?" Bokuto asked, glancing up at the dark haired man. Akaashi smiled gently at his boyfriend and nodded.

     "Of course, Bokuto-san. Maybe Kuroo-san and Kenma-kun would like to join us?" They looked over at the two of them as they walked in, and Kuroo smiled.

     "I don't see why not. Does that sound good, Kenma? We can go after we stop in and see Mom." Kuroo said with a grin as he glanced at Kenma for confirmation. Kenma nodded, trying and failing to keep from staring at the needle the nurse pulled out to use on Bokuto. Honestly, he would do anything to get out of the room he was currently in at the moment. "Alright, then. Sounds like it's settled. Come on, Kitten. Looks like they're ready for us over there."

     Kenma followed closely behind Kuroo as the taller man led him to another set of chairs, holding on to the back of Kuroo's jacket to keep himself from bolting out of the room. Another nurse waved them over with a smile.

     "Hi there! You both here to donate?" Her voice was cheerful and most-likely meant to be comforting, but it didn't really make Kenma feel any better.

     "Yup!" Kuroo said, plopping down in one of the chairs. "We're ready. Let's get stabbing!" The nurse chuckled at him and began prepping his left arm.

     "Left arm okay?"

     Kuroo nodded. "Yeah, it doesn't really matter. Either arm is a good stick." The nurse hummed in acknowledgement and swabbed a spot on the inside of Kuroo's elbow after feeling around a bit for a good vein. She turned a gentle smile on Kenma and motioned at a chair across from Kuroo with her chin.

     "You can sit over here, sweetie. We have another nurse coming in to take care of you. Should be here any second." Kenma quickly shuffled over to the chair she had mentioned and sat down, putting his satchel on the ground next to him.

     "Wow!" Kenma glanced up at Kuroo's exclamation. "You're good. I barely felt that." Kuroo's nurse had already inserted his needle and was currently checking over the tubing connected to it. She grinned down at him and shrugged.

     "Lots of practice," she told him. "It took some time for me to get this good."

     Kuroo made a noise of agreement and carefully leaned over to catch a glimpse of Bokuto. "How you doin', Bo?" A thumbs up popped into view.

     "I'm good, bro!" Kenma took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Maybe things would go well today. The nurses all seemed to be hitting well. That was a good sign. If he was lucky, they would all give blood with no hiccups and then go get ice cream together after seeing Kayoko. Sure, things could go that smoothly.

     "Hello," a voice spoke up from beside Kenma and made him jump. He looked to his right and saw a tall, gangly man with crooked glasses taking off a backpack. "Oh, sorry! Didn't mean to startle you. I just got in. How are you today?"

     Kenma wanted to say he would be better once they got this over with, but instead he just shrugged. The nurse wasn't even looking at him.

     "Good, that's good." Without further ado, the lanky man pushed the left sleeve of Kenma's shirt and started poking around with a finger at the inside of his elbow. Kenma fought against his knee-jerk reaction to pull away from the nurse.

     "I'm a hard stick," he mumbled, and the nurse nodded.

     "Yeah, I can tell," he grumbled. "Small veins."

     Kenma nodded hesitatntly. "They roll, too. Usually there's a spot on my right arm that works well."

     The nurse didn't seem to hear him. Instead, he stopped at a spot toward the tender underside of Kenma's elbow and nodded to himself. "That one is the best I can find right now, so we'll try it."

     Kenma swallowed hard as the nurse tied a rubber strip over his arm and turned to grab a needle. Thankfully, and much to Kenma's relief, he grabbed a butterfly needle, instead of the larger ones the other nurses were using on Kuroo and Bokuto. The relief didn't last long as the nurse quickly swabbed Kenma's skin with alcohol and readied the needle.

     "Alright. No time like the present." There wasn't even a count down. No warning. Just a sharp pinch that almost made him jump. The nurse frowned and shifted the needle in Kenma's arm. "Oh, come on. I just had you," he muttered under his breath. Kenma quickly shut his eyes and tried to imagine himself anywhere else but where he was.

     After a few more seconds of searching, the nurse sighed. "Can you hold this?" He pushed the plastic syringe attached to the needle through tubing still in Kenma's arm into his right hand and turned away, grabbing a cotton ball. Kenma took another deep breath in an attempt to ground himself as the nurse took his sweet time pulling the needle out and pressing a cotton ball to the pin-prick of blood.

     "Kenma? You doing okay?" Kenma didn't even look up at Kuroo's question, instead answering with what he hoped was a not so shaky sound of positivity. He didn't get to hear what Kuroo had to say about it before the nurse was talking to him again.

     "Has anyone tried to use your hands? There's some pretty visible ones there." The nurse picked up his left hand and pressed his finger to the vein that ran through the middle of Kenma's hand.

     "No," he breathed, eyes riveted to what the nurse was doing, unable to look away. "But if that's what you think will work..."

     The nurse nodded and pulled out another needle and alcohol swab, taking Kenma's hand and pushing it so that it bent at the wrist. "Okay. I'm gonna try here," he said, swabbing the spot he was talking about with alcohol, right at the outward bend in Kenma's wrist. "Since it looks like the best chance I have at sticking you."

     A soft, "Okay," was all Kenma could get out before the nurse pushed the needle into his skin. Pain immediately flared up Kenma's arm. The nurse tsked and felt around where Kenma's vein had been.

     "I can't believe this! I literally just felt it." He shifted the needle, and a new wave of pain washed over Kenma. "Alright," the nurse pushed the plastic syringe into Kenma's free hand again. "I'll get Diana. Maybe she can get you. Hey, Diana?" Kenma watched the nurse slowly draw the needle out of his wrist and felt a sudden wave of nausea wash over him, his stomach rolling uneasily. He suddenly felt lightheaded and a sheen of sweat formed on his face.

     Out of nowhere, there was a hand on his back, warm and reassuring through his shirt and jacket. "Hey, Kenma? Are you alright?" Ah, it was Kuroo. Leave it to the tall, dark haired man to know when Kenma was in trouble.

     "I think I'm gonna be sick," Kenma quickly whimpered, pressing his right hand to his mouth.

     "Okay, you need to get out of my way," Kenma heard Kuroo say over his head and there was the sound of some shuffling before something was pushed into his hand. Kenma blinked his eyes open,  _when had he closed them?_ , and saw that it was a blue plastic bag with a small ring of cardboard attached to its sides. He'd seen them before in his other hospital visits. They were made for holding throw-up.

     Something wet and cold was pressed against his forehead, and he nearly swooned with how good it felt against his clammy skin. "Here you go." A voice whispered over his head and Kuroo murmured his thanks from Kenma's left.

     "Kenma, I'm gonna lift your hair a bit, okay?" Kuroo said softly as he moved the hair at the back of Kenma's neck and pressed another thing that was wet and cold there. Kenma closed his eyes and tried to breathe through the nausea that was still roiling throughout his body.

     "He probably hasn't eaten anything today. That's usually what makes them sick." Kenma would have told the nurse to fuck off if his brain wasn't filled with white static and his stomach wasn't sitting in his throat. It seemed that Kuroo had already planned on taking care of it for him, though. The hand on his back stiffened, and Kenma could practically feel the anger and irritation rolling off his boyfriend in waves.

     "Or, maybe it was your shitty attempt at using his hand to draw blood. Actually, you didn't even use his hand, you used his wrist. I can guarantee you that no one ever taught you to draw blood that way. You're just a dumbass." Kenma wanted to agree with Kuroo, wanted to be brave enough to tell the stupid, dumbass nurse off, but all he could do was settle for a weak nod. "You need to get out of here. Right now. Before I do something stupid."

     There was no argument from Kenma's nurse, in fact the only response was the sound of footsteps walking rather quickly away from them. If Kenma hadn't felt like he was about to melt into the floor he would have laughed.

     It was quiet for a few minutes after that. Kuroo stayed where he was beside Kenma, rubbing his back gently while he tried to breathe through the nausea. Soon enough though, Bokuto and Akaashi made their presence known.

     "Is everything alright?" Akaashi asked softly, coming to stand on Kenma's other side.

     "Kenma's nurse was an asshole," Kuroo said by way of explanation. Somehow, Kenma managed to huff a chuckle.

     "Whoa, Kenma! You're white as a sheet!" Bokuto's face suddenly popped into Kenma's view as the large man bent down to look at Kenma's face. Kenma reeled back, getting his personal space back. The world immediately spun around Kenma, but before either Kuroo or Akaashi could help him, Bokuto reached out and steadied him. "Ah, sorry, sorry! My bad." He leaned back, still squatting in front of Kenma. "Better?"

     Kenma nodded and let out a long breath, pulling his sickness bag away from his mouth. "I think I'm okay now."

     Kuroo gave him a concerned look. "Are you sure? There's no rush."

     "I agree with Kuroo-san. There's no need to push yourself," Akaashi said softly, setting a gentle hand on Kenma's shoulder. "Perhaps you should lay down for a bit?"

     "I might as well do that in Kayoko's room," Kenma reasoned, and Kuroo smiled at him.

     "Alright, then. Let's go see Mom." Kenma stood on only slightly shaky legs, taking the hand Kuroo offered to him, and walked with the others out of the lab room. A nap really didn't sound so bad...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tada! I hope you all enjoyed that extra long chapter. I was struck with some inspiration after I, myself, almost threw up and passed out having my blood drawn recently because I also have incredibly shitty veins.
> 
> Anyway, here's some plot with more protective!kuroo, as I promised, like, at least 5 chapters ago.
> 
> Thanks again for reading! I love you all! Let me know what you thought. Leave a kudos and/or comment if you feel like it. They make me smile.
> 
> Stick around for more! I'll see you guys next time!


	22. Life Happens When You Least Expect It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You don't get to choose when things happen, but Kenma really wished he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *climbs out from under the rock I've been stuck under for months* Why, hello there! Yes, as you can see, I AM still alive. I apologize for the long gap in updates. I don't really have any excuses besides I was having some writer's block, and once I pushed past that, I was trying to decide if I really did want things to go the way they did in this chapter.
> 
> Anyway, here's a new chapter. It's a little short, but I think the content might make up for it a little bit. Thank you for reading and enjoy!

     "Oh, that nurse should be fired!" Kenma smiled at Kayoko's rasped comment of outrage. Despite laying in a hospital bed hooked up to so many machines it looked like she was part cyborg and aching from her illness, the fiery woman's protective streak still hadn't waned.

     He shook his head and hoped she could see it from where he was, laying on the small couch in her room with his head in Kuroo's lap. "No, he just shouldn't be allowed to ever draw anyone blood again," he murmured. He barely heard Kuroo's noise of agreement from somewhere above him, too focused on the fingers currently threading through his hair. If Kuroo kept that up he'd fall asleep.

     He said as much, his words slurring together, and Kuroo chuckled by didn't stop. Instead, he started massaging Kenma's scalp as well, and Kenma's eyes fluttered closed with a happy sigh.

     "I'm with Mom on this one. I think that guy should be fired." Bokuto's voice almost made Kenma jump, but him muscles were too relaxed to manage it. "He didn't even apologize to Kenma after he made him almost faint."

     As nice as it was to have so many people concerned about hjm, Kenma shook his head against Kuroo's thigh. "I don't even care anymore," he sighed, snuggling into Kuroo's stomach. "It's over and done with. I'm just sorry they didn't get to draw any blood from me."

     "They'll get over it," Kuroo murmured, his fingers working magic through Kenma's hair. It wasn't long before Kenma started drifting off, the stresses of the day and Kuroo's pampering too much for his tired mind and body. His mind tingled with the familiar feeling of falling asleep, and the last thing he heard was Kuroo laughing at one of Bokuto's jokes...

 //

     Kenma jolted awake he didn't know how much later when Kuroo jumped off the small couch they'd been sharing.

     "Mom?" He was calling, his voice pitching dangerously high with panic. "Mom?!"

     Kenma glanced around frantically, trying to get a grasp on his surroundings. Bokuto and Akaashi were still there, both of them wide-eyed and pale-faced. He was about to ask what was going on to find out what he was supposed to do, but the words died in his throat when a shrill, electronic sound startes cutting through the air.

     His eyes were immediately drawn to Kayoko, who was sitting up slightly, slumped over a bit to the side. Her face was slack, almost as if she were asleep.

     Kuroo was at her side in an instant, hands fluttering around her helplessly. "No, no, no, no! Mom!"

     Kenma jumped to his feet, his exhaustion forgotten, and rushed forward. He slapped a hand down on the red nurse's aid button on the wall close to the bed, but when a nurse didn't poof into existence right beside them, he huffed in impatience.

     Apparently he was not the only one.

     "Hey! We need help in here!" Kenma almost jumped at Bokuto's yelling, but he was more than grateful for it when he heard the sound of running footsteps coming down the hall toward them.

     Thirty seconds later, a handful of nurses and Dr. Anderson came running into the room and started whirling around in the space like a bunch of little tornados. Kenma felt hands pushing him out of the way, gentle but forceful.

     "What happened?" The Dr. Anderson shouted over all the noise in the room. None of the nurses spoke up, seeming at a loss.

     "Her oxygen levels plummeted right before she..." Kuroo trailed off, his voice trembling horribly. "I think her lungs finally gave out."

     Dr. Anderson sucked in a breath while he leaned over Kayoko and started chest compressions. "Get them out of here," she told one of the nurses, not looking away from the monitor attached to Kayoko.

     Bokuto fought against the nurse as he tried to usher the muscular man out. It took Akaashi's assistance to finally get him to leave more or less willingly. Kenma had expected this.

     What he hadn't expected was how Kuroo reacted.

     It was like he was a husk of himself, like something had come and torn everything out of him and just left a shell behind. The dark haired man didn't resist at all to the gentle but strong nudging from a nurse. The only thing that refused to move were his eyes, staying fixed on his mother's face.

     Kenma followed behind Kuroo, inches away from his boyfriend's back, not waiting for the nurse to move him. He watched Kuroo closely while the two nurses walked them down the hall to the waiting area for their floor.

     Once they were all relatively settled (i. e. Kuroo letting Kenma guide him into a chair while the smaller man settled into the chair next to him, Bokuto standing and rocking back and forth with his arms crossed over his chest, and Akaashi standing next to his boyfriend and nervously playing with his fingers.) the nurses softly explained that they would let them all know as soon as anything happened. They then quickly left, hurrying back to Kayoko's room.

     Silence took over once the four of them were alone together. Even Bokuto didn't dare break the fragile quiet. Kenma wanted to whisper soft words of reassurance to Kuroo, tell him everything was going to be okay, but he couldn't. He wasn't going to lie to Kuroo. Especially not when everyone, including Kuroo, was all too aware of just how hopeless the situation was.

     "This is a dream, right?" Akaashi, Bokuto, and Kenma all jumped at the sound of Kuroo's voice. "Like a..." Kenma could almost feel Kuroo's fear and pain stick in his own throat as he watched the dark haired man swallow hard. "Like a nightmare?"

     Kenma glanced at Akaashi, their worried gazes meeting for a second, before he looked back at Kuroo. He opened his mouth to answer, but Kuroo cut him off.

     "Maybe if I pinch myself I'll wake up," he muttered, but instead of doing so he rested his forearms on his knees and clasped his hands together, hunching over them deeply. Kenma thought he was done talking, but then, in a soft and trembling voice, he whispered, "Someone please tell me I'm dreaming."

     Kenma didn't have anything to say to that. His heart broke at the words, but there was nothing he could do. So, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly, then he laid a hand on Kuroo's back in what he hoped was a soothing gesture.

     Kenma's touch seemed to break Kuroo; it shattered the shell Kuroo had around him and left him shivering in its wake. A harsh noise left him, a gasping sob that shook his whole body, and Kenma wrapped his arms around Kuroo's broad shoulders.

     "This can't be happening," Kuroo hiccupped, pressing his hands hard against his eyes. "Make it stop.  _Please_ _!_ "

     Kuroo's begging seemed to finally jolt Bokuto into action. He covered the space between he and Kuroo in one quick step, kneeling in front of his sobbing friend, and tugged him into what must have been a bone crushing embrace.

     While this pulled Kuroo out of Kenma's hold, the smaller man didn't mind. Not if it meant Kuroo was given any kind of comfort. And Kenma could tell from the way Kuroo buried his face in Bokuto's shoulder and clutched at him, Kuroo needed a form of comfort that Kenma wasn't familiar with. So, he let Bokuto take over for now.

     Kuroo truly started crying, then. He sobbed words and questions that were muffled by Bokuto's shoulder, but to Kenma's ears they sounded an awful lot like, "What am I supposed to do?" and "Not my mom."

     Kenma jumped when he felt something gently tap his shoulder, and he looked up to see Akaashi offering him a tissue. He hadn't even realized he'd been crying, too. He took the tissue gratefully and wiped at his eyes and cheeks, clearing them of tears. Akaashi quietly sat in the chair next to him and didn't say anything, but his presence was comforting. Akaashi had always been that way, even from the first moment Kenma had met him. It was something Kenma was more than grateful for.

     Movement in his peripheral vision made Kenma look over. Dr. Anderson was walking out if Kayoko's room, a pensive look on her face. Kenma abruptly pushed himself to his feet and rushed over to her as quietly as he could, wanting to intercept him before she got to Kuroo.

     Dr. Anderson blinked in surprise at Kenma's sudden close proximity, but Kenma ignored her reaction. He didn't care if he was being rude. Not when Kuroo was involved.

     "What's going on?" he asked bluntly, not wanting to deal with any beating around the bush. Dr. Anderson gave Kenma a once over and glanced over his shoulder at Kuroo, obviously not sure if she should share any information with Kenma since he wasn't family.

     "She's stable. For now," she said and started to move around him, but Kenma stopped her with a hand on her arm.

     "Please." He looked up at het, begging him with his eyes. "Who do you think he'd want to hear it from first?"

     Dr. Anderson's lips pressed together into a thin, white line for a few seconds and she glanced at Kuroo again before her shoulders slumped in defeat. "Alright." She nodded. "Her lungs have failed. She can no longer breathe on her own. We have her hooked up to a ventilator, but she's not conscious. And it's very likely she won't regain consciousness."

     At this, Dr. Anderson looked Kenma in the eyes, making sure he wasn't looking away. "It's important that you and he understand this. What we thought was going to take a few months is now going to happen in the next few days." She pulled a picture of a body scan out of the file she was holding.

     The images didn't make a lot of sense to him, but he understood enough from the bright splotches that took over where her lungs were.

     And her brain.

     Kenma's breath caught in his throat, stuck behind his heart that had wedged itself there when Dr. Anderson had said Kayoko probably wouldn't wake up. He pried his eyes off the image in front of him and glanced up at her, waiting for her to confirm his fears and hoping she wouldn't.

     Her gaze was sympathetic when Kenma looked at her, but there was no hint of a joke in her eyes. "We put her through another PET scan early this morning. I just got the results a few minutes ago. Right after we got her stable." She paused for a moment, biting the inside of her cheek. "I'm so sorry."

     After what felt like hours, Kenma finally took a breath and nodded, feeling oddly hollow inside. "Thank you. Would you mind coming back later to talk it all over with him?" Kenma swallowed hard. "It might take him a while to process the news."

     Dr Anderson nodded and rested a gentle hand on Kenma's should, squeezing gently in a reassuring manner. "If you need me, I'll be in my office. The nurses can show you." Kenma nodded, and once she left he stared for a few minutes at where she'd been standing.

     What was he going to do? How was he going to tell Kuroo? This would break the man, Kenma was sure.

     He looked up and his gaze fell on the three he had left in their floor's waiting room. Kuroo had let go of Bokuto and was sitting solemnly in his chair with his head down, both Akaashi and Bokuto hovering around him.

     The nurse's words from a few nights ago echoed in his head.  _Would you want to be told, if you were the one who didn't know?_ Kenma would want to know, and he was certain that Kuroo would want to know, too.

Kenma swallowed again, and with a deep breath, he started walking back to his friends. His mind was made up. Kuroo needed to know just how small the numbered days he had with his mother were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah. That, uh, that happened. This was actually something that happened to my friend's mother earlier this year, except she had breast cancer that metastasized to her bones and then her brain. It happened so fast. Three or four days after they found the cancer in her brain, she died.
> 
> Anyway, I say that to give this sudden turn some believability and understanding. Things like this can and do happen, and they suck. But they are a part of life, unfortunately.
> 
> That being said, I think this story will be winding down to a close in the next 2 or 3 chapters, so everyone just keep that in mind. I might make this into a series with a BokuAka story and a KageHina story. You know, to give some more depth to the story. If any of you would read that, let me know.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading! I really appreciate it. If you want to, please leave a kudos or comment. They make my day. I look forward to hearing from you guys and updating soon! Bye ~


	23. The Pain of Two Brothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma doesn't want to tell Kuroo, wishes he didn't have to tell Kuroo so he could save him from the pain he knows he will feel, but Kuroo deserves to know. So, Kenma would tell him and be there for him through the pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I don't really have much to say before this chapter. I really like some of the emotions going on in here.
> 
> Anyway, thank you all so much for reading! I hope you enjoy this and don't want to kill me too much.

     Akaashi glanced up as he approached them, and Kenma could tell the quiet man could read that something was very wrong. He took a few quick steps to Bokuto and murmured something in his ear. Bokuto nodded once. Akaashi turned when Kenma finally stopped beside Kuroo, his eyes gentle and pained.

     "We're going to go get some coffee. Do either of you need anything?" Kenma read through the question, heard the understood moment Akaashi was giving he and Kuroo, and when he looked up and met Akaashi's eyes he saw the sympathy there.

     He cleared his throat and swallowed hard. "Ah, maybe some water." Akaashi nodded and tugged Bokuto away, the taller man not fighting the suggestion of movement. Kenma watched them go, waiting until they turned a corner before he turned back to Kuroo. The dark haired man was hunched over, his spine curved, his shoulders pulled up tight by his ears, and his face buried in his hands. The sight of his usually happy and exuberant boyfriend so worn and beaten by pain and exhaustion made Kenma's hands shake. How was he supposed to tell this man something that was going to change his life for worse? Especially after everything he'd been through so far?

     Kenma took a deep breath and let it out slowly, albeit shakily. Now was not the time to let his own feelings affect what he had to tell Kuroo. It would be better if he heard the news of his mother's fast-approaching death from someone who loved him, not a doctor he barely knew.

     "Kuroo?" Kenma called softly, but the man sitting in front of him didn't so much as twitch. Kenma sighed and knelt down in front of his boyfriend. He slowly pressed his finger tips against Kuroo's hands, gently tugging Kuroo's hands away from his face so he could look him in the eye. Tear tracks lined Kuroo's cheeks and his eyes were rimmed in red. His face was pale, paler than Kenma had ever seen it, except for some color that had risen to his cheeks from his crying. But still, Kuroo didn't look him in the eye.

     "Tetsurou," he said, trying to keep his voice gentle and understanding. Finally, Kuroo's brown eyes flicked up to meet Kenma's, and for a moment Kenma couldn't speak. But he swallowed again and pushed on. "I just talked to Dr. Anderson." Kuroo's eyes widened and his breath hiccuped out of him softly, and Kenma clutched at Kuroo's hands still in his own. "Your mother is stable for now. She's unconscious and can't breathe on her own, so they have her hooked up to a ventilator."

     Kuroo nodded and blinked, glancing down the hallway to their right where Kayoko's room was before turning back to Kenma. "That's good. It'll keep her from panicking as much when she wakes up." Kenma's heart ached at the certainty in Kuroo's thin, hoarse voice, that he had no doubt that his mother would come back to him.

     Kenma's eyes stung, and he blinked quickly as he shook his head. "Tetsurou." His voice came out warbled and strange, and Kuroo met his gaze with a look of fear and uncertainty in his eyes. "There's a good chance that your mother won't wake up again."

     Kuroo shook his head and tried to pull his hands out of Kenma's grasp, but Kenma didn't let him. "What do you mean? What are you talking about?" Kenma briefly closed his eyes tightly against the wave of tears that wanted to spill over his cheeks and when he opened them again Kuroo's face had flushed with emotion. With Anger, sadness, or pain? Kenma didn't know, but he pushed on anyway.

     "Dr. Anderson had another PET scan done on your mother early this morning." Kuroo shook his head at Kenma's words again, harder this time.

     "No," he said, his voice harsh and shaky. Kenma ignored him and kept talking.

     "She had just gotten the results back after they stabilized your mother-"

     "No!"

     "It showed an advancement in her cancer. It's-"

     "No!" Kuroo tore his hands out of Kenma's and slapped them over his ears, trying to block Kenma out. "Stop! I don't want to hear this!"

     Kenma's heart rattled and ached painfully in his chest, but he reached out to pull Kuroo's hands away. He wrestled gently with Kuroo for a minute or two, trying to get the other to just listen to him. Finally, when it became obvious that he wouldn't be able to over power his boyfriend, Kenma simply took Kuroo's face in his hands and waited.

     "Tetsurou," he sobbed gently, both of them crying freely now. "Tetsurou, look at me. Please, listen to me." He brushed his thumbs under Kuroo's eyes, only temporarily wiping away the other's tears. Kuroo crack his watery eyes and peered at Kenma miserably, his mouth trembling as he moved his hands to cover Kenma's.

     "The cancer has spread." Kuroo flinched at his words, but he didn't look away. "It's in her brain."

     A soft, mewling cry tore out of Kuroo's throat as he shut his eyes tightly, tears streaming down his face as his body rocked back like Kenma had physically hit him. Kenma leaned forward and tugged Kuroo into his chest, letting the other man bury his face in the crook of Kenma's neck. "No," Kuroo whimpered, the single word a high, choked sound that clawed its way out of his throat. Kenma held Kuroo against him, trying to take as much of the other man's weight as possible as Kuroo sagged against him.

     "I'm sorry," Kenma whispered. "I'm so sorry." Kenma shook with the power of Kuroo's sobs, his own tearing at his throat while he held his boyfriend.

     "It's days now, isn't it?" Kuroo rasped, his voice muffled by Kenma's shoulder. "Not the two or three months we'd thought before?"

     Kenma hesitated a moment before he nodded and whispered in Kuroo's ear softly, "Yes." Kuroo only trembled harder at Kenma's confirmation.

     "Damn it." That one curse alone breathed against Kenma skin carried the weight of Kuroo's agony.

//

      Bokuto and Akaashi came back about half an hour later. Kuroo had stopped crying, but Bokuto's eyes still swam with tears. Kenma guessed that Akaashi had probably told Bokuto there was more bad news.

     At first, Kenma thought he'd have to be the one to tell Bokuto about the sudden shortening in Kayoko's life span, but Kuroo spoke up after a moment. Kenma held his hand while he spoke, but it seemed to do very little to soothe the pain of speaking about his mother. He stuttered a bit over the words "brain", "cancer" and "days left", like they were catching in his throat, but he got them out all the same. Kenma was proud of him in a heartbreakingly painful way.

     Bokuto cried, again. This time he didn't hug Kuroo or clutch at Akaashi, though. He sunk down into a chair at the end of the hall and curled in on himself, silent.

     This seemed to worry Akaashi even more than if Bokuto had been loud and expressive with how much he hurt. The quiet man followed after his boyfriend and sat next to him, but he didn't touch Bokuto. Instead, he played nervously with his fingers and watched Bokuto closely out of the corner of his eye.

     Kenma wasn't much better, sitting quietly beside Kuroo. He didn't really know what else to do other than to simply offer his presence to Kuroo and hope that it was at least a little comforting. He expected to sit quietly for quite a while, which is why he jumped when Kuroo suddenly turned to him.

     "Did Dr. Anderson say anything to you about what they were go to do with my mom until," Kuroo swallowed hard, "she dies?"

     Kenma shook his head. "No. I asked her to come back some other time to talk to you about it. I thought you'd like some time to take everything in."

     Kuroo turned a small, grateful smile toward him. "Thank you."

     "We can go talk to her in her office if you want, though. She said we could find her there if we needed anything." Kenma wasn't quote sure where Dr. Anderson's office was, but, like she said, they could always ask the nurses for help.

     Kuroo took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds before he let it out slowly and nodded. "Okay. Let's go talk to her. I need to find out what they're planning in doing." Kenma stood when Kuroo did and followed him as he walked over to Akaashi and Bokuto.

     Kuroo knelt in front of his friend and gently touched Bokuto's knee with the tips of his fingers. "Bo," he murmured lowly, waiting for his friend at show that he was listening. When Bokuto's shoulders twitched, Kuroo continued, not perturbed by the fact that he couldn't see Bokuto's face from where it was buried in his arms. "Kenma and I are going to talk to Dr. Anderson about Mom. You wanna stay here or come with us?"

     Bokuto hesitated for a moment before he stuck a hand out towards Akaashi like he was reaching for him. "Keiji," he mumbled quietly.

     Akaashi took Bokuto's hand and gently stroked the back of it. "I'm here, Koutarou. I'll be with you whether you decide to stay here or go with Tetsurou." Kenma blinked in surprise of Akaashi's use of Kuroo's first name. He didn't think he'd ever heard the prim and proper man use anyone's first name beside Bokuto's. Kuroo didn't seem to notice it, though. He simply waited patiently for Bokuto to decide what he wanted to do.

     After a few minutes though, Kuroo shifted a little and squeezed Bokuto's knee gently. "I need to know today, Bo." Kenma could tell he was only half joking, and he wondered if Bokuto usually took a long time to make decisions.

     Finally, Bokuto shook his head. Kuroo sagged a little but nodded, patting Bokuto's leg lightly before he moved to stand up. Suddenly, Bokuto's hand shot out and grabbed Kuroo's arm, stopping him in his tracks. Kenma jumped at the quick movement and glanced back, only to be struck by an emotion he'd never accosiated with Bokuto.

     His heart ached in his chest at the torn and broken expression the usually cheerful and boisterous man wore. Tear tracks lined his cheeks, his eyes red and swollen, and face had paled considerably. He had a death grip on Kuroo's arm, his knuckles white, and his mouth worked soundlessly for a moment before he managed to get anything out.

     "I want to be there with you. I want to. But I-I can't-" Bokuto's voice broke and his face crumbled with a sob. "I can't sit in a room and listen to some doctor tell me my mom's gonna die again. I  _can't_."

     Kuroo carefully pried Bokuto's hand off his arm so he could hold it in his own. "I know, Bo. I get it. It's okay." He squeezed his friend's hand before he let him go. "I'll come back, and we can talk about it." He glanced at Akaashi and Kenma. "All of us. Together."

     The three of them nodded and Kuroo gave them a small smile in return. Kenma reached out and took Kuroo's hand, conflicting feelings of relief and sorrow clashing within him when Kuroo gently squeezed his fingers. Kuroo looked down at him and let out a sigh, his smile vanishing as quickly as it had appeared.

     "You ready?" Kenma studied Kuroo's face, observed just how dark the circles under his eyes were and how pale, sickly even, his skin was. Kenma wondered how long it had been since Kuroo hadn't had to really  _worry_ about something. He suspected it had been quite a while.

     "Yes," he said, gripping Kuroo's hand a little tighter. "I'm ready whenever you are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tada! Sad Bokuto and Sad Kuroo two chapters in a row! Yay! All aboard the Pain Train! Choo choo!
> 
> Thank you all for reading, especially this hurtful chapter. It means a lot to me. I hope you enjoyed it and stick around for more.
> 
> Please leave a kudos or comment if you feel like it. They give me the warm fuzzies.
> 
> You all rock! Until next time!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Kuroo/Kenma fanfic, and also my first AU, too. Hooray! Leave me some thoughts about how you think Kuroo and Kenma's relationship should go, or just tell me what you liked or didn't like. Thanks for reading, and stick around! There's more to come!


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